Battle of Wills
by Fay-Mishima
Summary: Mishima Fay today is Atobe Keigo's ex-wife. How do you manage life on your own? Meet new people? New love? Yet, you still share a son with your ex-husband? This story has two endings. AtobexOC and NiouxOC
1. Chapter 1

I asked myself for the umpteenth time that night in what I was doing there. I had not only been dragged to this event by my best friend and his wife, but I was shocked to find out that he was going to be minute I walked into the room, I felt that powerful gaze on me. Acknowledging a few people here and there, I immediately planned my escape route and found myself leaning against the balcony.

Sighing, I let the peaceful night calm me as the light breeze surrounded me. I was about to turn around and leave when I felt that powerful presence, and I felt it really close. Before I could grant him the honor of me talking to him, I found myself held from the back and a voice I knew very well whispered in my ears, "What are you doing here?"

I shivered at the touch; his warm breath against my ears triggered a lot of unfound memories. I stiffened in his hold and tried to elbow him, but he wouldn't allow me. "You have no right to touch me, Keigo." I hissed vehemently, "You lost that right when you took everything away from me."

He chuckled lightly, but he consented and let me go. "And you certainly have no right to call me Keigo anymore."

I straightened myself and glared at him. There he stood in front of me, Atobe Keigo. My ex-lover, ex-husband, and the father of my only child. Our marriage of two years lasted in a quick route. Our first year was of bliss and filled with love. However, the second year, it had initiated a lot of fights, disagreement between us, and finally divorce when none of us could take it anymore. The only thing I regret is losing the battle of the custody of my only son. I loved him dearly and he was taken away from me by him and that I will never forget or forgive. "Just….Just leave…" I said softly, moving away from him.

"You're not going to ask me how Rai is doing."

At the mention of my son's name, my heart ached painfully. How many days and nights did I cry because I could not see my beautiful baby boy grow in front of me? I composed myself and ignored his gaze again. I wondered if he enjoyed taunting me like this. Did he actually think that reminding me of my son would make me break down in front of him?

"Mishima Fay, I can see the emotions pouring out of you."

I held onto my tears and glared at him through a heated gaze. "You really are a bastard, do you know that?" I whispered as my whole body shook. "Do you enjoy reminding me every time you see me that my son is not growing up in front of me?" I demanded, ready to slap him, but he caught my wrist in a firm grasp.

"I'm sorry, but I do not want Rai to grow up with your influence."

The statement did not only shock me, but I'm sure that my whole face turned pale as well. My hand went limp and fell down on its own accord. I did not have the strength to move my body anymore. I turned around stiffly and gave him my back, "Just leave Atobe." I said softly, "I do not want to be reminded of you, for every time I look at you, I'm only reminded of my little boy."

Atobe's expression did not change, "He started kindergarten now. I will not tell you which one he's going to, but he is happy." Atobe added as he turned around and made his leave.

The minute he left, I felt a few tears slide down my cheeks. No matter how hard I tried to cage them in, they had managed to escape. In all my life, I had never felt my emotions so rattled. To watch your baby being taken away from you at the age of one devastated me. It had changed and depressed me. I covered my face and felt my whole body betraying me as it trembled; I just hoped that no one would come into the balcony and see me in this state.

As if my wishes were ignored, I felt a pair of arms around me, but it didn't surprise me, for I knew who it belonged to. The warmth and comfort he emitted, relaxed my emotions and I allowed that person to have the privilege of holding me. I turned around and walked closer into the arms of that person and allowed him to hold me.

My best friend's husband was someone very close to me. In fact, I was the one that had introduced them. He was someone very dear to me and my best friend did joke sometimes that I will take him away from her, but she knew that we would never to that, for we had too much respect for each other. However, life was ironic. Whenever I was depressed or hurt by Atobe, only one man could calm me down and that was Atobe's own best friend, Oshitari Yuushi. As you can see, we have our own little circle; best friends forever entertained with each other and somehow ended up marrying as well. "You let him get to you again."

I moved away from his embrace and leaned back on the balcony. "I'm sorry," I apologized quietly as my gaze settled on the gardens beneath us. "Whenever Rai's involved, I lose all my senses."

"Here." He said as he handed me a picture that he had pulled out from his pocket. "I took this last week when he started his first day at kindergarten."

I took the picture from him and my heart leaped. My eyes drank in the little boy that was smiling innocently at the picture. He was dressed casually and holding his bag as he waved at the person that was taking his picture. As much as I hated his father, my boy did take a lot after him. The looks and deep blue eyes were identical to his father. I hugged the picture and rubbed a single tear that rolled down, "Thank you, Yuushi."

"Sai's in the same class as him." He smiled proudly, referring to his own daughter, 'He'll be fine, Fay." He assured me. "Keigo only wants the best for his son."

I nodded quietly. I knew he was trying to soothe my nerves, but what he didn't know that it was only breaking me bit by bit. Oshitari and his wife did not know what it feels like to not see your baby growing up everyday in front of their eyes. I straightened myself and looked at him, "I'm going to leave." I announced in a whisper. "Please apologize to Yui for me." I referred to his wife.

"I'll drop you, Fay." He offered.

I shook my head, "No." I declined politely, "Thank you, but I've got my car." I explained as I took my leave. I made sure not to have eye contact with anyone as I left. Also, I had lied to Yuushi as well, for I did not have my car with me. I picked up my coat and walked out as I decided to walk home. Although I knew it was a long walk, but I wanted something to calm me down. I walked for quite a long time and my heels were staring to complain. I stopped for a rest and gazed at the night sky. The beautiful stars were dancing in joy as they looked down upon me. As I stood up to continue my walk, a car sped by me, but to my surprise, it halted to a screeching stop and reversed. "I confirm now that you are indeed crazy." Atobe remarked as he rolled down his windows and looked at me from the seat of his sports car.

I ignored him and continued to walk towards my destination. I wasn't in the mood for another run in with him, so I decided it's best to walk away. However, the sudden grasp at my upper arm made me realize that he was not backing down. He pulled me roughly towards his car and threw me in the passenger seat before I could even struggle. "This is kidnapping!" I shouted as I tried to open the door, but he had locked it from his side and I was not able to open it.

"Just shut up." He said annoyed as he moved his car into gear and drove. "A woman walking at this hour alone," he muttered sarcastically, "Don't you care if something happens to you?"

"No." I said softly look away from him. My anger had lessened and I watched the streets as he drove. "I don't care."

"Fay."

"Don't…" I said softly, "I really cannot handle you at the moment." I admitted as I pushed the hand that nestled on my knee. I wasn't sure what that gesture was for. Comfort? Sympathy? I just didn't want him touching me now.

He drove in silent. I was starting to get edgy at the sense of familiarity that was starting to invade my senses. I hugged myself by my thin coat and tried to stop shivering from the cold. He felt my shivering and reached for his suit jacket from the backseat and threw it at me. "Put it on." He ordered.

I didn't. I just placed the jacket on my lap and covered my bare legs from the knee-length dress that I was wearing. The silence electrified the small compartment of his car as he drove and I was thankful when I heard his car phone ring. Atobe turned the speakers on, "Hello?"

"Daddy."

My heart skipped a beat. It was a beautiful voice that belonged to an angel. Already innocence surrounded that voice. I wanted to hear more, but Atobe picked up the receiver preventing me to hear anything else. "Why are you still up? Don't you have to wake up early, tomorrow?"

Atobe listened to his son speak and finally spoke, "Go to bed, Rai. It's already past your bedtime, I will be home shortly." He said curtly, "Put Yume on, so I can speak to her." He ordered as he referred to the nanny that he had hired for his four year old son.

I heard him give firm instructions to the nanny and finally he hung up. When Atobe took custody of our only child, he had also taken a court order for me not to see him. Till this day I still don't know why he did something like that. The man that I had married was a compassionate man that would never allow a son to not know his own mother.

The car finally stopped in front of my apartment complex. With my divorce I was offered a lot of money and a villa, but I didn't accept it. I had made it clear to Atobe that I did not care for his money as I left the courtroom that day. I removed his jacket off my legs and hand it back to him without saying word. Opening the door, I stepped out and realized that my legs were shaking. To my surprise, he stepped out of the car and stood next to me. "Let's go."

"I can handle going to my apartment by myself." I said annoyed as I ignored him and walked inside. The security man greeted me and the look of shock was not misguided as he noticed Atobe next to me. Apparently I was not the only stubborn one when it came to both of us. We both stepped into the elevator as it took us to the top floor, although I did not allow Atobe's money into my life, I did spoil myself and got a penthouse when I moved out of his mansion.

We walked till we reached my door, "You can go now." I said not looking at him.

Atobe ignored me and backed me up against my door. He placed each hand firmly next to my face and leaned towards me. "Why do you hate me so much, Mishima Fay?" He questioned softly in my ears.

I pushed him, and then slapped him. The hard touch of my hand against his cheek felt so good that I almost jumped in joy, but I didn't. I glared hatefully at him and his gaze was not of an amusing one as well as he returned my hateful glare. I'm sure he didn't appreciate the fact that he had been slapped. "You think this is a game to you?" I whispered painfully. "Do you enjoy taunting me? Do you enjoy keeping my son away from me? Do you enjoy these sick games of yours?" I demanded looking hatefully at him. "You're an asshole! You want my son to grow up with someone like you as a role model?"

"At least it's better than having you as for a mother."

I raised my hand again to slap him, but he stopped me. Before I could even apprehend what he was doing, he opened my door and pushed us both inside. I struggled against him and my efforts only resulted in making us both fall on the floor. The familiarity of him on top of me weakened my thoughts. Although as much as I hated him right now, my love in the past for him was stronger than the hateful feelings I had for him presently.

He got off me and sat up, loosening his tie. "Che…"

I lay there on the floor and slowly decided to sit up as well. "I didn't invite you in." I said shakily as I pulled my hair away from my face. As much as we both went through a hard time during the bitter divorce, I sensed that the passion in our relationship had not died down. Every time I looked at him, I remembered the man I had married and loved. Although his actions had hurt me painfully, but my feelings for him had not died.

Before I could say anything, he pulled me forcefully towards him and kissed me, hard. The acquaintance of his lips on mine froze every living cell in my body. He had his arms around me, prohibiting me from moving or struggling. The lip that was placed roughly on my own softened. However, his arms still had a firm grasp on me as he moved his lips sensually on my own. I closed my eyes and allowed the warmth for a second, but when I felt myself being lifted and placed onto the sofa, I pulled away, bruising my lips in the process. "Are you crazy?" I demanded as I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand. "What do you think you're doing?"

"Hmph…" he muttered as he raised an eyebrow. "You know how to kill someone's mood." He remarked as he stood up.

My heart was beating fast. What just happened? Did I almost lose control with him? I do remember that we were very physical in our relationship, but to have him kiss me like that since our divorce in two years was astonishing. I stood up shaking furiously and stumbled a bit as I made my way to my door. I was determined to throw him out; however, I never made it to the door, for everything turned black as I took two steps.

When I opened my eyes, the feeling that I was held by someone engulfed me. I was sleeping between the outstretched legs of someone and being held tightly as if that person was afraid to let me go. A hand was nestled against my back and another at the back of my head. I sensed the rising chest of that person as it told me that he was in deep sleep. I shifted to look at the person's face and found it to be Atobe's. Quickly moving away, I had not only stumbled out of his embrace, but woke him up in the process as well. When I was on the floor I realized that I was only wearing a shirt, his shirt. I looked up and found him staring at me, he was only in his pants and he acted like it was the most natural thing for him to be doing, sitting in my apartment like that. "What are you doing?"

"You blacked out."

I blacked out? I haven't fainted in a long time. Were my emotions that unstable that I had blacked out in front of him? I did not care about that now, "Did you… did you undress me?"

"Are you acting like a shy virgin bride now?" He mocked sarcastically. "I've already seen all of you."

I glared at him, "Why are you still here?" I asked annoyed and ignoring my blushing cheeks. "Rai is waiting for you."

"It's already 4 am, way past his bedtime."

"You just leave our son at home like that with the nanny?!" I demanded.

"Rest assured that the nanny is capable."

"It's probably because you're sleeping with her."

His eyes narrowed, "You don't' seem to have much faith in me." He said annoyed as he stood up.

"That should be my line."

He clenched his jaw and watched me cautiously. Without a word, he pulled me up and lifted me. I was too angry to say anything as he made his way too my bedroom. I didn't even know how he knew where the bedroom was. He dropped me onto my bed, "Rest." He ordered as he took one of the pillows off my bed and headed towards the door. "I'm going to sleep in the living room."

Needless to say I didn't get any sleep that night. The clock that ticked above my head was the only sound that I could hear as I tried to sleep. Knowing that he was next door frightened me. It was hours that I lay like that, finally giving up entirely on sleep; I got off the bed and padded to the kitchen, for I needed some coffee.

I made my way into the kitchen quietly in order not to wake Atobe up. I could see him soundly asleep on the sofa with his arm on his eyes and one knee bent. As I made my coffee, I picked up a book from the bookshelf and decided to do some reading, but I frowned when I noticed that he had no blanket on. I went to one of my closets and pulled an extra blanket out. Returning to him; I covered him with it and went back to my book and coffee. As I read my book, my mind kept drifting to the sleeping figure on my sofa. I was still trying to understand why my ex-husband was at my apartment.

I don't know how long it had been, but I woke up with a jolt. The sunlight had made it's presence into my apartment and had brightly lit everything already, which confirmed to me that it was late in the morning. I sat up and found the same blanket that I had covered my ex-husband with last night on top of me instead. Throwing it aside, I looked around and confirmed that I was alone after all.

I was feeling very vulnerable since last night as I headed into the shower. I stayed there for a while and then came out fully dressed. I looked at the clock on my wall and noticed that it was almost noon. It has been a long time since our divorce, but the impact of it hit me this morning after what happened last night. To also hear my boy starting kindergarten, confirmed to me that I had indeed missed his first childhood years. The joy of watching your baby crawl for the first time and take his first steps was something I was always looking forward to. I remember when Sai did that, her parents were both overjoyed.

I wanted to see him.

I needed to see him.

I want Rai in my arms.

With those words, I was determined to find out something's. I rushed to my study and switched my laptop on. As soon as I was logged in and hooked to the Internet, I went to all the search engines I knew and looked for the top kindergartens in this region. I could've easily asked Yuushi which one Sai went to, for she was in the same class as Rai, but I didn't want to put him in such a position. After all, Yuushi was Atobe's best friend.

I lucked out as I found two names. I wrote the names and addresses down and picked up my coat and handbag. Taking my car keys with me, I decided to be nosey and take a better look for myself.

I didn't luck out at the first address I went to, for the building was pretty much a rundown and knowing how Atobe is like, I just reversed and left the place without even bothering to leave my car. When I arrived at the second destination, I knew I hit the jackpot. The lavish building and tight security was all I needed to confirm that my son was indeed part of this. I got out of my car and walked towards the entrance, I had already prepared my excuse if someone I recognize spotted me.

Walking inside the building, I took off my sunglasses and looked around me. Already I could see that most of the children were preparing to leave since it was close to ending session. I kept looking and looking until there was a small doubt in my mind that I must've mistaken the place and Atobe didn't place Rai here. I retraced my steps back to the exit when I felt a tug at my back.

"Um ….."

I turned at the voice and time froze for me. The world stopped and the sounds disappeared. A curious pair of deep blue eyes was looking up at me as the figure still held onto my bag. I could not breathe. I could not speak. I tried to say something, but my lips would not move. However, he beat me to it when he said, "I know you."

I blinked. He knew me? How was that possible?

"You're Sai-chan's godmother." He explained with a childlike smile. "I saw your picture."

Tears formed in my eyes. Godmother? Godmother? Don't you know that I am your mother? I leaned down and patted his head gently, then moved forward and kissed his forehead. With that, I rushed out of the building and ran to my car. I heard him call me, but I never looked back. I was weak. Even in front of my own son, I was weak.

The tears burst out. Why was he doing this to me? Why was Atobe doing this? To this day, I do not know what he has against me or why he took my boy away from me. Was it his pride? Ego? Or was it the fact that I was the one that asked him for a divorce?

I finally calmed down and drove away. I was driving aimlessly until I reached my own penthouse. Numbly, I picked up my stuff and headed towards my floor. I locked the doors and lay on the sofa.

I could not feel.

I was numb.

The pain was unbearable.

I shut my eyes tightly and hugged myself trying to throw my emotions away.

I don't know how long I had slept for, but when I opened my eyes it was dark. The darkness surrounded me and it suited my shadowy soul as well as the only light visible was through the mass billboards through my window. The sudden ring of my phone frightened me, but I didn't move.

I ignored it.

I ignored the many rings.

I ignored the phone that rang through the night.

And I ignored the phone that rang during the day.

I just stayed there. I felt like my soul was sucked out of my body and the only thing left of me was my body that had no control of its own. I did not want to see anyone. I did not want to speak to anyone. And I simply did not want to be alive anymore.

* * *

"She's not picking up."

Yui looked at her husband with a frown. "It's been three days, Yuushi." She said softly as she watched him try again. The two of them were at Atobe's office dropping Rai off. Atobe got held up and had asked him to bring his son to him. He usually picked Rai himself and never allowed the nanny or the driver to do so. However, Atobe was not amused when Rai walked in, for he could not stop speaking about Sai-chan's godmother and how pretty she looked when he saw her a couple of days back.

Oshitari heard that as well. He asked Yui to wait at the reception with Sai and walked into Atobe's office. He found Atobe standing in front of his son with his arms crossed. "Did she say something to you?" he heard Atobe ask.

Rai thought for a second as he raised his finger to his lips. "No." he answered shaking his head. "All she did was look at me and then she ran off."

"Che…"

Oshitari put his hands in his pockets. "I think you should stop being stubborn now."

"She is not going anywhere near my son."

"Yet you still want her as your wife."

Atobe ignored that remark. "She is just a beautiful woman that I like to keep me company, nothing other than that." he answered crudely as he went back to his desk.

"And you just admitted that she still boils your blood."

Atobe watched him un-amused, "Do you mind not being crude in front of my son?" He asked annoyed at the fact that Oshitari was right.

Oshitari shrugged, "You started it."

Atobe was going to say something, but Rai tugged at the sleeves of his jacket. "Daddy…" he said softly as he placed his bag on the floor. He rummaged through the bag and pulled out some papers. Rai handed it to him and Atobe tried to understand what it was till he finally comprehended that it looked like flowers. "We made this in class for mother's day." He referred, for it was the second Sunday of May in a couple of days.

Atobe looked at his son without any emotions.

Rai looked down with a blush. "Um…can you give it to her please?" he asked softly as he moved his foot nervously behind him. It was true that Rai did not know his mother, but he knew that she existed. Atobe placed it on his desk, "I'll see what I can do." He replied curtly as he walked to the window. "How about we go and get something to eat, Rai?"

"Yes!" he nodded in happiness. "Can Sai-chan come with us?" He asked Oshitai, who still stood there. Oshitari patted his head gently, "Not today." He answered the little boy. "We're going to check on someone." He remarked, "And in case you're wondering, she hasn't picked up her phone for three days and the security said that she hasn't left her apartment at all." Oshitari added the last remark for Atobe's ears as he walked out of the office.

* * *

I opened my eyes and found myself in a surrounding of unfamiliarity. I tried to move, but feeling numbness in my right hand prevented me from doing so. I looked to my right and found an IV drip in my vein. I felt my energy all washed up, I placed my left hand on my face and tried to register what was going on.

"I don't know what to say."

That voice made my head turn. I found a very displeasing Yuushi looking at me. "Where am I? What happened?" I asked, ignoring the look that he was giving me. "You are at the hospital because you had locked yourself up in your apartment without eating for three days." He answered my question. "Do you want to die, Fay?"

His question didn't faze me. I didn't answer him nor look at him. I sat up with a struggle and absently moved my hand through my limp hair. I knew I looked like a mess. "You also violated your court order, Fay. You were not allowed to go near Rai."

I still sat there speechless. My eyes were staring at my lap and I just didn't want to say anything. I knew he was disappointed in me. I was disappointed in myself. I had been strong willed for the last years and I should be stronger now, but I only ended up breaking myself now. Was it the fact that I saw my son that made me like this?

"Fay."

"Stop it Yuushi." I said softly as I held onto my head. "I understand. I did something stupid." I admitted as I held onto my head. "I don't need you to tell me 'I told you so.'"

He sat on the edge of my bed and held my hand. "I know you're hurting." He said softly, "You have to be strong."

I nodded quietly and then excused myself and told him that I wanted to sleep. I was aware of him being in the room for a while, and then finally he left. I lay on the bed absently and tried to think of my life and what I had gone through. I was pathetic. I'm sure everyone around me thought so as well. I closed my eyes and shut them tightly, tomorrow was a new day and I had to think of a way to improve it.

* * *

In the morning, I checked out of the hospital. I was checked by a doctor and he told me that I was free to leave. I didn't phone Yuushi, for I wanted to be alone to clear my thoughts. I told myself that I'll call him later and thank him for bringing my stuff yesterday as well, for at least now I looked decent enough to leave. I walked to the elevator and noticed that there was a crowd in front of it, so I decided to take the stairs. As I walked towards the stairs and was ready to take the first step down; I felt a slight dizziness wash over me and before I knew it, I had lost my footing and was about to collide with the steps. However, something stopped me. An arm had held me tightly around my waist and caught me almost in mid-air. I felt myself being pulled back against a strong build and I sensed the person behind me relax as he breathed out a sigh of relief, which tickled my hair against my cheek in the process. "That was close." He whispered.

I placed my hand on the arm and turned back to get a glimpse of the person that rescued me. I was not a person that easily got deluded by someone's appearance, but when my eyes settled on the concerned face of the individual that rescued me, I felt something. I don't know what I felt, but it was something.

He steadied me and then let go of me. I felt another rush of dizziness and almost lost my balance again, but he caught my upper arm. "Are you sure you should be leaving the hospital?" He asked as he helped me lean against the stair railing. I looked up at him and moved my hair off my eyes, "I'm fine." I whispered softly, "I just haven't eaten for the last three days." I admitted with a shake of my head. "The doctor told me I could leave."

To my surprise, he didn't say anything else. He helped me down the stairs and walked me to the door, but I couldn't help notice he kept doing it cautiously as if he were afraid that someone would recognize him. He looked left and right and then helped me cross the street and took me to a small restaurant. "Allow me to invite you to lunch." He offered as he walked me inside.

"It's not like you're giving me a choice of saying no and I'm not exactly someone who can't afford lunch."

A hint of a smile touched his lips as he helped me sit down. "It was either me feeding you or carrying you back to where you live."

The statement made me blush. "I'm sorry." I apologized quietly as I looked down. "I didn't mean to drag you like this." I admitted as I looked at him for a second and then averted my gaze. "I could've asked someone to check me out of the hospital and drop me home, but I just wanted to be alone." I whispered. Then I shook my head and looked at him straight in the eyes. "I want to thank you again for rescuing me."

He smiled, "Actually I am partially to blame for you taking the stairs." He said, "The reporters were harassing me in front of the elevator and I had to slip away somehow."

That stopped me. Reporters? I thought to myself as I kept looking at him. I tried to bring my senses to work and recognize the man in front of me, but I was honestly clueless. I knew now that I was too curious, 'I'm sorry, but I don't know you." I admitted embarrassingly, "Are you someone I should know?"

His smile broadened, "This is exactly why I invited you to lunch." He remarked, "It's a relief to lunch with someone who won't harass you endlessly about useless things."

I looked at him. Normally I would classify an individual who made that comment as a braggart, but the way he said it actually made him sound modest to me. I watched him again and saw clear eyes look at me. Shaking my thoughts away, I prepared another question to avoid looking at him anymore, "That still didn't answer me who you are."

"I am a pro tennis player."

I shuddered at the mention of tennis. It immediately reminded me of my arrogant ass of an ex-husband. I realized that the man in front of me noticed my shuddering look and it was his turn that asked, "You're not fond of tennis?"

"I'm not fond of anything to do with my ex-husband." I mumbled incoherently and obviously in annoyance. He leaned back in the chair and crossed his arms. "That is interesting." He remarked, watching me. "You also answered my question if you were committed to someone."

Something about that statement made me feel uncomfortable. "You're being rather forward." I stated bluntly. I averted my gaze and looked down to my folded hands on my lap. I sensed awkwardness in the air as I went quiet. To my surprise however, I heard him chuckle. "Do not worry." He assured quietly. "I am not like that. I apologize if I made you feel uncomfortable; it's just a relief to find someone you can talk to who doesn't recognize you."

His apology relaxed me. In fact, it even made me smile, "No, I am sorry."

He nodded and looked at ease as he heard my apology as well. "I am sorry if I offended you in anyway." He said sincerely, "I do not like to make a beautiful woman such as you uncomfortable."

His remark made me blush; "Now you have succeeded in embarrassing me." I admitted as I pushed my hair absently behind my ear. What was this feeling? Have I not been in the company of a man in such a long time that I was starting to get edgy? Or was it the fact that he kept flattering me? I let out a sigh at these thoughts as I ate quietly.

He made light conversation with me and I admired his intellectuality. I found it refreshing to talk to someone who rarely used the word 'I' in his conversation. All ever Atobe did was talk about his day or himself. Don't get me wrong, I do not want to put him down completely, he did have his good days as well. As we talked for sometime, I completely lost track of time till my cell phone interrupted me. I looked at it and noticed that it was Yuushi; I excused myself for a second and picked it up. "Hello?"

"You're not at the hospital."

I actually felt embarrassed, "No, I'm sorry." I said quietly. "I checked out earlier and just wanted to be alone."

"How are you feeling?"

"I'm better now, thank you." I answered softly. "Can we talk later? I'm out actually with someone." I admitted. Whether he was amazed or not, he didn't show it. He told me to take care of myself and then hung up. "I'm sorry." I said looking at my companion, "A friend that worries too much about me."

"A boyfriend?"

I looked up at him, "You really don't give up, do you?" I asked as I eyed him carefully. What was it about those eyes that captivated me? It was almost the same as Atobe's when I first met him. I felt like I was under a microscope and was being studied very carefully.

"I just love teasing you."

"You just met me." I pointed out haughtily. He was a fun person to be around, but some of the things he said did make me wonder. "I don't even know your name."

"Normally one would introduce oneself first before asking."

I rolled my eyes at his comment as I sipped my drink. I allowed that remark to slip by and looked at him, "My name is Mishima Fay."

He nodded. "It was nice meeting you, Mishima Fay." He said with a smile. "I am Fuji. Fuji Syuusuke."


	2. Chapter 2

Oshitari Yuushi blinked. "What?" He questioned slightly, for he wasn't sure if what he had heard was correct. Oshitari stood in Atobe's office and watched his best friend cautiously.

"Fay can see Rai."

Oshitari narrowed his eyes. He knew Atobe too well. Something was definitely up or he wouldn't consent like this so easily. "I sense a 'but' in your statement somewhere." He aid bluntly as he placed a hand in his suit pants. He had asked Atobe on several occasions to allow Fay to see her son, but he had always denied her the right.

"Fay can see Rai, but I don't want him to know that she is his mother."

"Congratulations Atobe." Oshitari whispered softly. "For years I have defended you against people for calling you a jerk, and now I have to go and apologize to them." He said flatly as he left Atobe's office with a slam of the door.

* * *

Fuji Syuusuke.

It was an interesting name. I don't think I've ever heard of that name before. After we had lunch, he offered to walk me back, but I politely declined. I liked his company, but I wasn't sure yet if I wanted him knowing where I lived. However, he did stop a cab for me and escorted me in. also, I noticed he did something mean. During our conversation he had taken my cell and dialed his number. "You could've just asked." I had said at that time, but he just gave me one of his angelic smiles.

I reached my apartment building and walked in. The security gave me a look of concern and I thanked him for worrying about me the other day and allowing Ohitari in. I reached my floor and let myself into the apartment. I felt at ease as I fell onto the sofa. I lay my head on he sofa pillow and closed my eyes. Things have changed in my life and I needed to find a better way of approaching them. I was just about to get up and take a shower when my door knocked. I knew immediately who it was as I opened the door. "Hi."

Oshitari Yuushi looked at me with a slight surprise. His eyes studied me and then a frown settled on his delicate lips. "You're not emitting a back off or I'll bite aura." He concluded as he walked into my apartment. "Are you better?"

I nodded and gave him a light smile. I was actually feeling better. Was it because of my encounter with Fuji that made me feel like this? I thought to myself as I went to the kitchen to fix some drinks for Yuushi and myself. I'm thinking too much into this, I'll probably never see Fuji Syuusuke again. "Yuushi, would you like coffee or fresh juice?"

He took off his suit jacket, placed it on the table and walked into the kitchen as well. "I'll fix my coffee." He offered as he took the stuff that he needed. I watched him carefully and noticed that there was something wrong with him. "Normally the question is directed at me, but Yuushi, is something the matter?"

He let out a sigh as his hand dropped from the cupboard door and watched me. "Before I even tell you what's off beam, I want you to promise me that you will say no."

Something in his statement made me realize how serious this must be. Although I knew he was going to hate me for this, I wasn't one to act rashly without having all the details. "I can't promise you anything if I didn't know all the facts." I said quietly and the look he gave me was one of disappointment.

He walked closer to me and placed his hands on my shoulders. "You can see Rai."

My heart felt like it was given an extra jolt of electricity. I searched his face to see if there were signs of a cruel joke in them, but there was none. Yet, something in my heart knew something was amiss, for I knew my ex-husband too well. "I can't tell him I'm his mother, right?" I whispered hurtfully as I looked down at the floor.

He didn't say anything. Instead, the hands that had clasped on my shoulders pulled me in for an embrace and held me tightly. "You're such an idiot." I whispered softly as he held me. "You fret too much about me." I added quietly, "I'm fine…"

"Please say no."

I shook my head, still in his arms. "That is one thing I can't do." I answered avoiding looking at him. "Just to see Rai grow up is enough for me." I remarked as tears of reprieve flowed down my cheeks. "I don't need him to call me mother, Yuushi." I assured, "I really don't."

He let out a defeated sigh. It was if he already knew what I wanted to say. "Do you know why he is doing this?" I heard him ask me.

The question did enter my mind a lot, but I was clueless. However, I had some theories of my own. "Maybe it's because Keigo never grew up with a mother." I reasoned as Yuushi continued to make his coffee. I suddenly remembered something, "I recall at one time that his father said something that if a boy grows up weak it's because his mother was always there to baby him…" I murmured as I put a finger to my lips.

"They've got issues.' He muttered as he stirred his coffee and then took a sip of it. He finished his coffee and then look at me, "So how do you want to do this?" He asked me quietly. "I'm the one who will bring Rai to you; I will not allow Atobe to do that."

I didn't really think of that. I thought for a second and then looked at him, "How about Keigo's country house, Yuushi?" I asked because if I wanted to see my son, I wanted privacy. "You guys come along too because Rai will think it peculiar that I'm meeting him by myself, so you, Yui, and Sai come too." I said quickly. "Just say you guys are going out and I'm meeting you as well."

Oshitari watched me and nodded. "Sounds like a plan." He said quietly. "Let's do this tomorrow, alright?"

I nodded happily and watched him go. It was still early in the evening and I had a lot of things to do. I couldn't wait. I decided to quickly get that shower and sleep. If I sleep early, tomorrow will come early.

* * *

Oshitari Yui watched her husband and felt something was muddled. She walked up to him from behind and placed her hands on his shoulders as he sat on the chair. "You're much tensed." She murmured softly as she massaged her husband's shoulders.

He rubbed a hand through his hair and leaned on the chair as he raised his face to watch hers. "How much do you think a person can sacrifice till they end up breaking down?"

Yui watched her husband's face upside down as he looked at her. "Sacrifice?" She asked confused as she cupped his face. He let out a sigh and stood up, "We're going to Atobe's country house tomorrow." He told her as he explained the situation to her.

"I'll prepare a basket of goodies then."

Oshitari smirked, "You know the help there will probably prepare enough food for a wedding."

"But it won't be made with my loving heart." She winked as she went into the kitchen.

* * *

It had taken hours for morning to come, but I didn't care. As much as tired I had been, I didn't care. I had kept staring at the alarm clock on my bed at every hour. Starting from 5 AM, then 6, then 7, and finally at 9 AM, when I was actually supposed to wake up.

Now I was in my car heading towards the country house. As much as I hate that place because we had spent a lot of private times there together, I simply didn't care. I needed privacy and that was the only place I was going to get it. It was an hour's drive and I finally arrived. I wasn't surprised to notice that I was the only one there. The help did look astonished though to find me there when the butler opened the door for me. "Oshitari-sama already told us to prepare things by the pool area, Mishima-sama." He informed me as I walked into the house.

Walking along the hallways, I shuddered as the déjà vu sense came to me. I hated these hallways, for it reminded me too much of him. Whenever we had wanted to be alone, we would've escaped to this place. This place was our peaceful heaven and seclusion. Now that I think about it, we never really fought in this place.

I walked towards the pool area and almost made it outside, but froze. What? What? I asked myself shocked. Why is Keigo here? I thought as I watched my ex-husband lying tiredly on the pool chair only in swimming trunks. The look on his face was one of sheer exhaustion. "Keigo!" I found myself shouting as I walked outside. Several maids that stood around the area backed off quietly as they saw my wrath. "What are you doing here?" I demanded angrily glaring at him.

He looked at me and sat up from the chair. He moved his sunglasses to the top of his head and watched me carefully. "Excuse me?" he asked as he rubbed his bare shoulder, "This is MY house."

I looked at him hatefully. My day was ruined. It was totally ruined. "Yuushi's bringing Rai here!" I hissed intensely. "You did this on purpose." I accused him with tears in my eyes. "You're a twisted…" I began, but we were interrupted.

"Daddy~"

His eyes narrowed as he saw Rai running towards them. Atobe stood up and a maid placed a towel around his shoulders as he stretched quietly. "How many times have I told you not to run around the pool? You're still learning how to swim." Atobe remarked with an authoritative voice as he looked critically at his son.

Rai looked embarrassed at being scold at. He put his hands behind his back and then he did something that surprised me. "I'm sorry." He apologized quietly as he bowed to his father. Once he lifted his head up, his eyes settled on me. "Um…"

Atobe watched him and then back at me. "This is Mishima-sama." He said curtly, just as Oshitari arrived with Yui and Sai. Oshitari immediately looked alert as he noticed Atobe there as well. "She is a good friend of Oshi…"

"She is Sai-chan's godmother!" Rai interrupted happily. "Sai-chan says nice things about you." He blushed as he stood in front of me. I watched my baby say those words and felt a tug at my heart. As much as I wanted the earth to open up and swallow me, I chose not to run this time. I placed my hand on his head and smiled at him, "Sai has told me a lot of pleasant things about you too, Rai." I said softly with a voice I didn't recognize.

He blushed even more as his smile broadened. After a few minutes, he walked off to one of the maids as she helped him dress for the poolside. Fay relaxed a bit, but not enough to be fully tranquil. Her eyes went to her ex-husband and she eyed him dangerously. "If you want an apology from me, you're not getting it." He confirmed as he crossed his arms. "I needed a place to loosen up. I didn't know someone was going to be here." he muttered as he lay back on the chair. "Just do whatever you want, I'm not moving from here." He mumbled with a wave of his hand.

I felt mortified. The day that I was so looking forward to was starting to collapse bit by bit. As my shoulders slumped, I felt a hand on one of it and when I turned to look, it was Yuushi. "The kids are waiting, Fay." He said with a sincere smile, "Go to them while I keep Atobe companionship."

I nodded hesitantly and decided to make the best of it. I changed quickly into a swimming suit and joined Yui and the children. I watched my son as he played with Sai and they both looked thrilled at being here. We stayed in the water for some time and the whole time, I made sure I was close to Rai. He was an inquisitive boy and he didn't hesitate in asking me a lot of things. Even I ended up doing the same thing.

Finally, we decided to leave. One of the maids gave me a towel and I dried myself. I saw Rai trying to dry himself as the other maid helped Sai and I walked towards him. "Hey…" I said softly, "Come here." I smiled gently as I towel dried his hair for him. He shivered slightly and to my surprise walked into my embrace. "Chilly…" he quivered.

I wrapped the towel around him and hugged him close. "How about we get some dry clothes for you then?" I asked as I lifted him up. He huddled close to me and put his arms around me. To my distaste, I found his things next to Keigo. I walked towards where he lay and just placed Rai on my lap. One of the maids offered to help, but I declined politely. This is my boy and I want to do it. As I pulled out his clothes, Rai sneezed and held me closer. "Cold….." he whined softly.

I felt my baby's body tremor through my own and I hugged him even tighter. "It's alright, sweetie." I soothed quietly as I helped him put on a sweater. "Bundle up in this and you'll feel better." I said as he nodded courageously. "Put socks on as well."

He obeyed without a word and did what he was told. Once he was done, he looked at me with awareness. "You can go to Sai-chan and Yui and drink some hot chocolate. It will help you feel warmer."

As soon as Rai ran towards them, I heard the famous, "Che…"

I looked to the source of that and glared at him. "Can I help you?" I asked Atobe without caring. "You're already babying him." He remarked in an exasperated tone. I watched him as he lay there lazily, he really did look out of it. He had an arm on his head and he was just watching. I stood up completely ignoring him and tied my hair into a ponytail. After a few seconds, I turned around and left him as I headed towards the group.

My day was going rather well. Even though Keigo was here; I dealt with myself and decided that his presence was not going to bother me. The kids spent a lot of time with me while we talked and played. Finally, it was lunchtime and I was taken aback to see that Keigo was joining us for lunch. I sat down next to him, completely ignoring him and I found Sai sit next to me while Rai took a seat next to his father. We ate in a semi-silence mood. Oshitari and Yui made some light conversation and we did join, but it was obvious that neither I nor Keigo were comfortable.

As I ate silently, I saw Rai struggling a bit with his baby fork and knife. Before I could reach up to him and help, my ex-husband had beaten me to it and was actually showing him how to do it properly. I blinked when I saw that. I had thought that Keigo never really interfered in Rai's upbringing. This brought a question in mind, where is my son's nanny? I wanted to meet the woman and see if she is fit to handle my son.

Shaking my thoughts away, I resumed back to my food and finally we were all done. Keigo went back to his chair while Rai sat on the floor reading and Sai was coloring with her mother. I walked to my son and sat next to him, "What are you reading?"

"Poetry."

I let out a sigh and took the book from him. "Interesting." I remarked softly as I flipped through the book. What is Keigo teaching our son? I thought wryly to myself. I have no objection in liberal arts, but I didn't want Rai growing up only concerned about these. I was going to say more when my cell phone rang. I looked up distracted and walked to where Keigo was, for my handbag was there. Rummaging through my purse, I pulled out my phone and frowned. I didn't know the number.

"Hello?"

"Mishima-sama."

I sat down on the chair. "It's you, isn't it?" I asked softly. I wasn't sure, but I had a feeling it was him. "I forgot that you had stolen my number."

A light chuckled came on the other side, "Not stole, but burrowed."

I felt light headed. Why was Fuji Syuusuke calling me? Wasn't yesterday just a coincidence? He said he wasn't like that. Then why is he calling me? I asked myself several times. "Is this…um…a social call?"

"I actually wanted to ask you to dinner."

I bit my lip. It was awkward. It was awkward. My ex-husband was next to me and I had someone on the phone asking me out. "On a date?" I questioned meekly trying to speak as quietly as possible.

He laughed. "Date is a rather strong word. How about for company?" he asked casually.

I hesitated. I was actually thinking of accepting, but I wasn't sure if I should, for I didn't know what his true intentions were. Since he was being forward with me, I decided to be blunt as well. "You won't try anything funny…" I pointed out firmly.

"A tennis player's honor."

I rolled my eyes. "Please." I muttered sarcastically, "I told you I don't trust them." I said softly. "You have to try another way."

"On my honor then. Fuji Syuusuke's words."

The statement relaxed me. I agreed to dinner with him and we decided on a place to meet. Looking at my watch, I noticed that I still had a few good hours with Rai before going home and getting dressed. I snuck a glance at Keigo and found him asleep. Whether he heard my conversation or not, I wasn't sure, but I was glad that he didn't make any remarks to it.

By the time I knew it, it was time for all of us to leave. I cherished this day, for it was one of the best days for me. I owed Yuushi a lot for making it easy for me. I walked up to Rai and smiled at him as I leaned down and hugged my knees. "I had fun."

He nodded shyly and to my surprise he hugged me lightly. "Can we do this again?" he asked as he looked at the floor. I rubbed his hair playfully and nodded. "I would like that." I said softly, "Make sure to always be good and don't make daddy angry."

He nodded.

My heart tugged again as I stood up and walked to collect my things. It was a first step for me to be here with my son. However, I never imagined that I'd leave him so fast. I know I should be grateful for having this time with him, but I was being greedy and I wanted more. I picked up my bag and other stuff that I brought with me just as Keigo sat up. "I can't believe you've been sleeping all this time." I muttered unconsciously.

He rubbed his eye without due consideration and stood up. "I told you I was weary."

"Just make sure that weariness does not kill Rai." I answered as I pulled my handbag onto my shoulders.

"Che…" he muttered as he put on a shirt, "And I really thought you were worried about me." He said sarcastically as he buttoned his shirt. "My nerve-racking days over you is done." I answered flippantly as I left him there.

* * *

 _Later_

Idiot?

Smart?

What am I?

I stood in front of my mirror and frowned. I had tried not one, two, or three different outfits, but sixteen. So this brings me to my question again, am I an idiot or something else? Why am I fretting so much over an outfit? He said it wasn't a date, I told myself repeatedly as I studied my reflection in the mirror. I had tried on a pair of pants and a sleek top, but it looked too casual and I didn't want him to think of me as informal. I put on a nice elegant dress, but it was too revealing and I didn't want him to think of me as I was hinting something. Finally after throwing out tops, pants, and dresses; I finally settled for a printed knee length skirt and a plain top to go with it. I felt it made me look different, but I just didn't have the time to change anymore.

I quickly picked up my bag, shoes, and earrings and rushed to the door. I had refused it when he offered to pick me up because I was still hesitant about him knowing where I lived. I got into my car and drove to the address he had given me, to my surprise I found myself driving a bit out of the city and finally I ended up at a secluded restaurant by a lakeside. "Where is this place?" I whispered as I got out of the car.

"A quiet and serene place that I go to so no one can harass me."

I turned and saw Fuji Syuusuke dressed in a formal shirt with a tie and formal pants. I noticed that as he walked towards me that he had foregone his suit jacket. "Do you like it?" he asked as he took my arm gently and led me towards the restaurant. "I know the owners and not a lot of people come here, which makes it perfect for us to be alone."

To be alone? What is he exactly thinking of? I stopped a bit as he was leading me. He noticed my hesitance and smiled, "Mishima Fay," he said softly, "You owe me your trust." He pointed out, "I told you that I am a man of my words and I'm not a pervert."

I bit my lip, but nodded as we went inside. The restaurant was breathtaking as we entered. Cozy warm seats, beautiful dim lights, and the aroma of delicious appetizers filled my nose. I noticed that light music was playing and I realized it was a violinist as he played his tune uncaringly so the viewers can admire him in silence. Fuji led me to a table on the side and helped me sit down. He took a seat opposite me and smiled, "How about I make one thing clear before we start so we can be comfortable."

I blinked in confusion when I heard him say that.

"I already have a special someone, Mishima.'" He proclaimed, "I meant it when I said I wanted to have dinner with you for companionship. I found you very interesting to talk to, for you don't hesitate when you want to say something."

I felt a huge burden lift off my shoulders. However, I was still uncomfortable, if he had a special someone, won't that person object to him being here with me? I had to ask. I just had to ask. "Fuji-san, won't your girlfriend object to you having dinner with me here? I mean if I were her, I would object if you brought a woman to such a beautiful place."

"Don't worry." He assured as he looked at the menu, "He's not the type to care for what I do with my time and we have complete trust in each other."

"Oh, ok…" I muttered looking at my menu. Oh, wait a minute. Did he just say…."He?" I asked sensitively looking at him as I dropped the menu. "Oh…" I whispered quietly, then when it finally hit me, "OH!" I exclaimed covering my mouth.

He put his menu down and leaned his elbow on the table as he held his hands. "I imagine we can be at ease now."

I glared at him in annoyance. "You could've told me from the beginning you know." I said as I drummed my finger on the table, "You were playing with me all this time." I accused as I crossed my arms. I didn't know whether to be annoyed or overjoyed. He actually had the tenancy to laugh in embarrassment. "I'm sorry, but it's not really something I'd say straight up to a person I just met." He apologized with a chuckle.

"No, but that doesn't make me forgive you for flirting with me."

"I wasn't flirting."

I shrugged, "Call it whatever you want." I said as I picked up my menu, "You led me on." I remarked in aggravation as I scanned the menu. I peeked at him and found him looking at me innocently. "You're not planning on apologizing, are you?'

"No, because I know that I haven't done anything erroneous."

My eyebrow twitched at his statement. Why was I acting like this? Was I trying to relief my anger because I found out he was into men and not interested? Or was it because I was actually thinking of him? I looked up at him and found him smiling casually as he studied his menu. "Fuji-san?"

"Yes, Mishima-san?"

"I'm annoyed."

He chuckled again and nodded. "I know." He said standing up, "Want to walk for a bit and clear our heads? We can come back and eat later." He offered as he held his hand out to me. I took it and walked out with him. The night chilly air swooshed around me and I found myself leaning closer to him. I was more comfortable around him now. The fact that he did not like women in that sense actually reassured me. "I'm sorry." I found myself saying, "I ruined the evening."

"Evening hasn't ended yet." He said as we walked towards the lake. "I am partially to blame as well, for I had not been fully open with you."

"It's alright." I said softly, accepting his apology. "What do you wish to gain by dining with me?"

"A friend."

I smiled at that response, "Well, Fuji Syuusuke, you got that in me."

Surprisingly, we got along flawlessly fine after that. He talked a lot about many things, including his 'special someone'. I found myself opening up to him as well, but I refrained from discussing Keigo. I simply didn't want to talk about my ex-husband or son at this stage. Finally, the night was over. He walked me to my car and gave me a smile, "I enjoyed."

I nodded at his statement, "I will admit that I did too." I added as well as he helped in my car. He leaned down as he placed his hand on the hood of my car, "Let's do this again, Mishima-san."

"Call me Fay-chan, Fuji-san." I said without thinking.

He nodded and told me to do the same thing. I finally bid him goodnight and drove away. I was actually relaxed and was feeling good about myself. My day had been exciting and my night had been eventful. I drove aimlessly enjoying the night air in my convertible when my cell phone rang. I frowned at the time, for it was late. I picked it up when I realized that it was Yuushi, "Hello?"

"Fay…" his voice sounded sympathetically.

My heart pounded. Something was wrong. Something was not right. Something had happened. And as if my fears were denying the truth. He confirmed the tragic news to me as I stopped the car.

What was I going to do now?


	3. Chapter 3

The color Black.

"Black."

It's ironic how one word could be assorted with so many negative feelings.

Remorse

Agony

Sadness

Bitterness

And finally, death

I stood there without sensation. So did a lot of people around me. I couldn't look up and I could not look to my side. However, my hand was clutching tightly to a tiny hand and I was trying so hard not to break down and cry in front of that little one because I knew she needed me to be strong for her. As we watched the body of Oshitari Yui lay to rest, I felt that my knees were going to give away. I felt my sensations wanting to let go of me, a tiny body woke them up as it huddled close to my leg. I looked down at Oshitari Sai and felt my heart yank. I bent down and patted her head gently. "Let's go back." I told her softly and she nodded sadly.

When Yuushi had called me that night, he had told me that Yui had left the house after a heated argument with him and ended up in a car accident because of her reckless driving. Sadly, neither she nor the driver of the car that collided with her made it out alive.

I helped Sai into the car and sat there quietly with her. She still held dearly to my hand refusing to let go. She is too young to see her mother go, I thought as I held her in my arms. I closed my eyes, for I was exhausted. I had helped Yuushi in the last two days with the arrangements (note). Plus, it had been exhausting, for Yuushi had wanted a traditional Japanese funeral, but Yui's parents were against it since her father was not of a Japanese descendant. Her father had agreed to everything except when it came to the crematorium (note).

In the long run, Yuushi had consented for he knew no matter how he buried his wife, she was not coming back. I let out a sigh and waited in the car as I watched everyone go. I left the car door open to get some fresh air when I saw Keigo walk past our car and to my surprise he stopped and retraced his steps towards us when he noticed me. "How is she?" He asked referring to Sai who was sleeping on my lap.

I looked up at him as I moved Sai's hair off her face. I tried to see what his eyes were saying, but I couldn't because they were concealed by his sunglasses. "She's not good." I replied quietly as I placed my jacket around Sai's sleeping figure. "I think she's still in shock."

He leaned down and cupped Sai's cheek lightly. I knew Keigo had a soft spot for her; he was her godfather after all. "Fay." He said looking up at me from where he was leaning. "Take Sai back home with you while I handle Yuushi." He ordered softly as he stood up and turned, but I grabbed the sleeves of his jacket. "Keigo, please make sure Yuushi rests. He hasn't slept for two days." I confided in him, "I'll keep Sai with me for a few days."

He nodded and walked off.

I asked the driver to take us home. Once we arrived he offered to carry Sai inside, but I declined politely. I held her lightly and walked into my apartment complex as the security man opened the door for me and then he escorted me to the elevator. As I stepped out of the elevator, I stopped as I saw two people standing there. "Oh…" I said surprised as I recognized them.

"Fay-chan! Fay-chan!" A person yelled hugging me for dear life. He hugged me so tight that I was afraid that Sai would die of suffocation. Before I could kick him, he was already pulled back roughly and he lost his balance. "Jirou!" A female scolded softly yet in a tough tone. "Can't you see that she's carrying Sai?" She demanded as she looked at the man on the floor.

I watched in awe at Akutagawa Jirou and his wife. An old friend of mine who went by the name of Arai Kaede, but she was now Akutagawa Kaede. They made an odd pair. He tended to be hyperactive over everything while she was more laid back. It was more like fire versus ice, but I knew there was love in that relationship. I saw Jirou rub the back of his head in embarrassment and stood up. I watched them and smiled, but found tears in my eyes. I knew why they were here. Even though Kaede lived far away, I knew why she was here. Without saying anything, Jirou lifted Sai off my arms and Kaede hugged me tightly. "I'm sorry we didn't come sooner, Fay." She said softly as she rubbed my back.

"We're sorry we missed the funeral." Jirou apologized as he walked to my door.

I moved away from Kaede and rubbed my tears away. "It's not me you should be apologizing to." I said softly as I pulled out my keys from my purse and headed to where Jirou stood. I turned the lock and opened my door, allowing them in. I met Kaede through Jirou since he was one of Keigo's good friends from school. Kaede and Jirou have been married for six years now and I admire how strong their love has been. Even with the fact that they can't have children, they're love and adoration for each other just progressed day by day.

"Where do I put her?" Jirou asked.

"Let's put her in the guest room." I answered as I walked towards it. "Follow me." I said as I moved the covers off the bed and fluffed the pillows. Jirou placed Sai quietly on the bed while I covered her with a blanket. We walked out of the room and found Kaede in the kitchen making something for us to drink.

"Where are you two staying?"

"We're staying at Keigo's." Kaede answered as she poured the juice into glasses. "He wasn't there, but we invited ourselves over." She said proudly as she served us.

"Don't worry, I text him." Jirou assured as he lay on the sofa. "We went to see Yuushi, but he wasn't at home so we came here."

"Last resort?" I asked sarcastically as I sipped the orange juice. I lean back on the sofa and let out a sigh. "It's weird." I admitted as I looked at my glass. "I'm fine, yet I feel something's missing." I said softly. It was depressing, but I was feeling the same emptiness when Keigo and I divorced. Although by that time, it was both of our decision; it still felt weird when I was no longer married to him.

Jirou out an arm around me and smiled. "We love you." He assured cheerfully as he gave his wife a loving smile as well. "We're staying for a while to make sure you don't end up babysitting everyone."

I felt like crying again, but I closed my eyes instead and put my head on his shoulder. I decided to rest a bit, but I didn't apprehend that I had fallen asleep.

Kaede was watching TV when she heard the doorbell ring. She ignored the two sleeping figure on the sofa and walked to the door. To her surprise, she found Atobe in front of her. "I should've known you two were here." He smirked as he walked in. The minute he walked in, his eyes settled on Fay as she slept on the sofa and Jirou on her lap. "You're okay with that?" He asked.

Kaede shrugged. "It's not like that they're doing anything behind my back." She answered as she walked in. "And you're here because?"

"Always straight to the point." He answered as he handed her a bag. "Sai's things." He explained as she looked at the bag curiously. "Yuushi's at home, he'll come see Sai tomorrow."

Kaede frowned, "Sai needs her father now."

Atobe watched her carefully, "Not in the state that he's in. It's finally hit him that Yui's gone." he said softly as he placed his hands in his pockets. "I'll bring Rai over tomorrow as well so he can distract Sai a bit."

Kaede looked staggered, "You're letting Rai near Fay?" She asked with her hands on her hips. She knew of Fay's agony with her son, but she wasn't informed of the latest progress.

He patted her head gently, "It's a long story." He explained.

Kaede pushed his hand away, "I'm not a pet." She muttered annoyed, "I hate it when you do that."

He smirked again and watched his ex-wife and Jirou. "Will you two head back to my place tonight?" He questioned casually as he turned and walked towards the door. "No." Kaede answered as she stood next to him by the door. "Fay needs us more."

He rubbed his jaw, "I wasn't aware that she was a good friend of Yui."

Kaede smacked his arm lightly, "You truly are an arrogant ass." She mumbled in cohesively. "You think she cares what she's going through now? Her main concern is Sai at the moment." She answered quietly. "And you of all people should know how painful it is for a child to grow up without a mother."

He narrowed his eyes, "What's that supposed to mean?"

Kaede rolled her eyes. "You really want me to stamp it for you?" she asked sarcastically, "What you're doing to Rai…hmph…"

Atobe stood surprised as he saw Jirou muffle Kaede's mouth with his hand. He had one arm around his wife and the other on her mouth preventing her from continuing her sentence. "We agreed that it was none of our business, Kaede." Jirou told his wife quietly.

Kaede moved away from him and ignored them both as she walked away. Jirou gave Atobe an apologetic look, "Sorry."

Atobe glared at where Kaede had disappeared to and then looked at his good friend. "She is not your responsibility to apologize for." Atobe told his friend firmly as he turned to leave.

"She is my wife." Was all that Jirou said as Atobe left.

Oshitari Yuushi was at his home cleaning out Yui's things. Although he was a man that lost everything, he wanted to make sure to clear everything out before he brings Sai home in a few days. Although he was trying to clear things out, he was also a drunken man. He let out a sigh and tried to clear his thoughts. He was feeling guilty, for he was partially to blame on why he and Yui argued, and that was something he didn't want anyone to know.

Especially the reason to why they fought.

* * *

I knew it was morning the minute I opened my eyes and I was not surprised that we had slept through yesterday afternoon. I stirred and found myself on my own bed. How did I end up here? I wondered. I also found Sai and Kaede occupying the bed with me. I sat up as I scratched my hair and yawned slightly. My legs dragged themselves as I made my way to the shower and decided to shower and at least prepare a proper breakfast for Kaede and Jirou who was sleeping on the sofa. Even as the water hit me, I felt numb. It was a new day and yet I felt like something was still missing. I wanted to cry, but my tears refused to pour out. What was it that was making me feel like this? Did I want to cry for Sai? Yuushi? Or myself?

I finally finished showering and dried my hair. I walked out and began preparing breakfast. I still could not absorb anything as I unconsciously prepared things. While I was making juice, I heard the doorbell ring. I walked to it, opening the door and blinked. There stood my ex-husband with my son, but I was still numb. "Come in." I said softly without any feelings. "Do you guys want breakfast?"

"We ate." Atobe answered as he watched me peculiarly. He looked at Rai who was watching Fay oddly and leaned down. "Rai, why don't you go watch TV in the other room?" Atobe told Rai. The little boy hesitated, but nodded as he walked off. Atobe crossed his arms and watched me as I made things absently. "Fay?"

"Huh?" I looked up as I poured hot water into the kettle to make some tea, but to my disclosure. "Ouch!" I whispered as I over poured it and dropped the kettle onto the floor splashing water everywhere. I was going to move, but Keigo stopped me by holding my arm. "Don't move." He ordered briskly. It was so sudden that it took me a few minutes to register the burning sensation in my right hand. "Oh…" I said softly as I snatched my hand away and realized that I had scalded it.

Another hand held my arm, "That is malicious." Jirou remarked as he looked at my burnt hand.

"It's just a first-degree burn." Atobe explained as he took my hand and ran it under the faucet's cool water. "Jirou hand me a gauze pad from the first-aid cupboard and one tablet of ibuprofen." Atobe ordered as he kept my hand running under the water.

I winced at the stinginess that I was feeling and shivered. I was so stupid. I was so out of it that I didn't realize what I was doing. I glanced silently at Keigo and let out a sigh.

"At least that woke you up." He remarked quietly. I wanted to snatch my hand away as his comment offended me, but he kept his grip unyielding. "What are you doing here?" I hissed, "How come I have to see you everyday now?"

He ignored that comment, "I brought Rai over for Sai."

I didn't say something as Jirou handed him the gauze pad. He applied it gently onto my reddish hand and handed me the tablet. "Take it." He ordered in a tone that there was not going to be any arguments from. Without saying anything else, he handed me a bag, "These are Rai's things. You can keep him over the weekend since Yume's not here and I have a business trip."

I looked at him in shock. He was leaving my son with me? For two whole days? Why now? Why now after all these years? "Wh…" I began as I looked at him. "Don't ask me." He interrupted. "Yuushi's coming with me as well since he is my Financial Advisor." He explained, "Plus, it'll do him good to take time off."

"He'll see Sai before he leaves?"

"Yes." He nodded, "He'll stop by later. You know Yuushi once his mind is set up. He's at home with helpers and packing everything, he's selling the house." He explained as he leaned on the kitchen table. "He's acting too fast."

I placed my hands on my hips and looked at him. "He's you best friend." I remarked feeling sad for Yuushi. "Don't you think he's making a rash decision?"

"Don't worry, Fay," Kaede commented walking in with Rai. "This is Yuushi we're talking about. He is the most sane one out of this group." She said too sweetly making Atobe glare at her while her own husband smile in embarrassment. Atobe was going to taunt back when Sai walked out rubbing her eyes. "Daddy?"

I walked to her and lifted her. "Good morning, sweetie." I cooed as I moved a few strands of hair off her eyes. "Did you sleep well?" I asked her quietly. She nodded shyly and looked curiously at the three pairs of eyes that were watching her. She looked left and right and then back at me, "Daddy?"

"He's home tidying up some things." Atobe answered as he crossed his arms. "Why don't you change and then watch some cartoons with Rai."

"Rai-kun's here?" She asked excitedly forgetting about her father.

I nodded and stood amazed at her excitement. So Keigo knew that Sai was fond of Rai, interesting observation that ex-husband of mine has. "Come on, let me help you take a bath and then I'll give you and Rai some breakfast." I said as I walked with her to towards the bathroom.

"Fay, Jirou and I will go with Atobe to check on Yuushi." Kaede announced as she picked up her jacket. I nodded and bid them well while I helped Sai.

Throughout the day I spent it with the children. Although it was a time of sadness for us, I couldn't help think that it was death that brought my son closer to me. I still can't believe that Keigo just walked in and left him here with me. As I stayed with the kids throughout the day, I noticed that there were at times where Sai would go into a quiet spell, but Rai kept making her forget her melancholy and suggest that they do something.

By evening, I could tell that weariness had finally invaded the children's bodies. To change their environment, I had even taken them downstairs across the street to a fast food joint for a light snack and they enjoyed the toys they got with their kids meals. At first, Rai did say something about commoners' food, but I lectured the boy slightly and thinking at the same time what was Keigo implementing into his mind.

By the time we went back, we found…" Daddy~" Sai exclaimed running towards her father as he hugged her. "How's my baby girl?" Oshitari asked softly as he kissed her forehead. "Have you been giving Fay-chan trouble?"

She shook her head with a blush as she put her arms around his neck.

I held Rai's hand as he sleepily walked towards them with me and looked in awe. Yuushi looked so….normal, I thought. He looked at me, "Fay, thank you.' he said sincerely as he held Sai tenderly. I watched him sadly and let us into my apartment. "Didn't Kaede and Jirou come to see you?" I inquired as he placed Sai on his lap as she put her head on his shoulder. Rai took a seat next to her and just closed his eyes.

"Kaede's putting him through labor at my house; I want to clear things out."

I stopped when I heard that, I so wanted to lecture him, but I decided to be civil. "I think you're acting too rashly, Yui just passed away two da…."

"I know what I'm doing." He interrupted firmly as he felt Sai stiffen in his arms. He hugged her tightly and smoothed her long hair. "Are you cold, sweetie?" he asked as he found her sniffing. "No…" she sniffled, 'I have something in my eyes." She whispered trying to cover up her tears. Oshitari ruffled her hair and stood up, "Where does Sai sleep, Fay? I'll tuck her in."

"In my room, Yuushi." I answered as I helped Rai stand up as well. "I'm not scared." I heard Sai speak out embarrassed. I smiled at her, "I know you're brave, sweetheart, but I'm not as brave as you are and I need someone with me." I reasoned and to my joy, my reasoning seemed to sink in and she agreed thankfully.

As Yuushi took Sai to my bedroom so she could change, I leaned down and looked at my own son. "And you, young gentleman? Sleepy?" I asked him as I saw him yawning. He nodded shyly as well, but before I helped him into the guestroom he grasped my skirt lightly, "Um, can I speak to daddy before I sleep? I do every night."

This piece of information was new to me. I was learning something new about Keigo each day. It was ironic that it was our son that was teaching me these new things. I couldn't deny him that right, so I picked up my cordless phone and dialed Keigo's number, I didn't even talk to him when he picked, but handed the phone to Rai.

Once the children were asleep, I spent some time with Yuushi. The façade that he had put in front of his daughter was shattered now and I could see the weariness on his face. I sat next to him on the sofa as he removed his glasses and rubbed his eyes jadedly. "Are you overworking?"

He laid his head on the sofa and watched me as he nestled his glasses on his lap. "You may think of me as crazy…"

"I do already." I interrupted with a smile as I watched him.

He smirked slightly, but continued. "I sold our house." He said softly, "I don't want Sai to go home and be reminded of Yui, so I'm moving us out and into an apartment."

I thought of that for a second and then frowned. "Won't she object?" I questioned as remembered something. "That house is full of memories for her." I remarked quietly as I crossed my arms. "I spoke to her about it." He explained as he folded his arms behind his head. "She said she doesn't want to go back home because she's scared." He replied with a sigh. "That's why, Fay, if you don't…"

I knew what he was going to ask. "Yuushi." I interrupted again as I put my hand gently on his knee. "She can stay with me as long as you like." I offered with a smile. I loved his daughter and after all the help he gave me through my relationship with Keigo this was the least that I could do for him. He nodded and stood up, "Well, I'm off." He said, "I got a plane to catch tomorrow."

"Where is your busy business meeting?"

"Bangkok." He answered while walking to the door. "Wait.." I said as I held his arm, "You said you already sold your house, did you find a place to stay already?"

He smiled casually, "It was actually Atobe's idea." He told me softly, "When I come back, we'll be your new neighbor, two floors down." He replied as he pointed downward.

* * *

Finally, I was alone. I felt my energy literally drain out of my body as I fell onto my sofa. I was tired. I was exhausted. After going through all that, I had even forgotten about my burnt hand. However, even with feeling tired like this, I felt alone. The remorse of someone I knew that had passed away was starting to haunt my thoughts. I felt like I had a lot of responsibilities that it was starting to overwhelm me. I was grateful for everyone helping, but I felt engulfed. My eyes fell on my cell phone as it lay on the table; I hesitated but picked it up. I don't now what I was thinking, but I looked through my received calls and dialed a number that had called me a couple of days back.

"I won't say that I'm not astounded." Fuji spoke on the other end of the phone when I said hello. His statement made me speechless, I hesitated again, but decided to be truthful. "I'm sorry." I apologized, "I just…I just wanted to talk to someone without feeling that the whole world's responsibility lies on my shoulders."

"You sound upset."

I closed my eyes. "I'm not upset." I replied with a yawn. "I'm just exhausted." I admitted as I heard shuffling. "Okay… maybe I'm a bit upset, a friend passed away." I blurted as I placed my feet on the table.

'My condolences."

"Thank you."

He spoke to me for a while and then out of the blue. "I am invited to an engagement party tomorrow, would you like to accompany me?' He invited, "Maybe a change of atmosphere will help you feel better." He suggested with a concerned voice.

I hesitated, "I'm not sure…"I admitted as I thought that it would be difficult to leave the kids, but then I remembered Kaede, "Thank you for your offer, but… oh… aren't you going to go with your boyfriend?" I questioned suddenly. He chuckled softly, "Mishima. I told you before that he doesn't care for these affairs." He repeated casually, "I insist that you join me.' He pushed in a commanding tone. I hesitated again, "I don't know them…" I said reluctantly, "I mean…"

"He's a good friend of mine. He's in my circle of friends of pro tennis." He explained sincerely, "He'll love who I bring with me, plus they know me well enough to know that any lady friend I bring is a good friend of mine."

After a lot of persistence from his side, I finally agreed to his invitation. I wasn't sure if it was right for me to go, but I think his company would be positive for me during this time. I waited for Kaede and Jirou to come back and asked Kaede if she can watch the kids while I attend to something tomorrow, she actually encouraged me to go and said that that was exactly what I needed now. I was still hesitant, for we had a funeral a couple of days ago and now I was….but I shook my thoughts away.

I needed to do this.

The evening of the next day arrived before I knew it. I had chosen a simple black elegant knee length dress. It was strapless and had a lot of embroidery on it. I matched those with sandals and Kaede had blow dried my hair for me since she had knack for it. Surprisingly, I had an enjoyable day. The three of us took Rai and Sai to the beach and it was the first day since Yui's funeral that I saw Sai smile genuinely. I bid everyone a good night, picked up my purse, and walked out. I let out a sigh and waited for Fuji to pick me. I finally agreed to have him pick me up and he was pleased about that fact because he knew it was a sign of me trusting him more. I waited a bit when I found a limo pull up in front of me; I rolled my eyes wryly thinking of my ex-husband. "I didn't know you were attention seeking." I remarked as he helped me into the limo.

"And so are you with that dress on."

I rolled my eyes again and leaned back. "Thanks." I murmured softly as he offered me a drink. "I really needed this." I admitted as I accepted the glass from him. He nodded in agreement. "You did not sound like the woman in control that I knew over the phone." He added as he twirled his glass lightly, "However, I won't judge, you haven't opened up to me yet completely."

"And I won't at this stage." I answered humbly, "I'm sorry.' I apologized just as we reached. He didn't comment as we left the limo. He tucked my upper arm under his and walked towards the entrance. As we walked in, I realized that we were walking into a hotel. "Oh, it's here?"

"Yes, a small gathering in one of the smaller ball rooms."

Suddenly I stopped and he looked me oddly, "What is it?"

I looked at him discomfited, "I didn't bring any engagement gift with me." I said meekly as studied me. My statement made him smile, "you worry too much.' He said as he pulled me towards the floor of the party. As we arrived at the floor, I noticed a sign by the side of the door and it said:

 _ **~*~Engagement party of Yukimura Seiichi and Sawada Aya~*~**_

I read it again trying to register the names or at least think if I knew the couple but I didn't. As Fuji walked in with me I noticed that there weren't really a lot of people. The room was only filled with around fifty or so members, it really was a private engagement party. Fuji greeted a few people here and there. He walked me towards a gentleman that stood in the centre.

"Seiichi." Fuji greeted warmly as he shook his hand. I watched mesmerized at the man's face. He looked so beautiful that I almost mistook him for a girl, but his manly personality and the confidence that he possessed made you immediately change your mind and think of him as all man. The man's eyes intriguingly eyed me, "And you are Mishima Fay?" he asked knowingly.

I nodded and was going to congratulate him when I heard a murmur, "Mishima Fay? Mishima Fay?" the voice questioned making me, Fuji, and Yukimura turn. A tall man stood rubbing his jaw. He had his eyes closed and one arm crossed across his chest as his face was at me. "Are you not the Mishima Fay who was Ato…" he began, but I panicked. I immediately walked up to him and covered his mouth. My gesture surprised the other two men standing next to me. I gave a nervous laugh and looked at the intruder, "That is not public information I wish to share with anyone…"

"So you are Atobe Keigo's ex-wife?" Yukimura Seiichi remarked making me groan. I let out a sigh and moved my hand away from his mouth. "Damage is done." I muttered softly looking down. "Interesting." Yukimura perceived as he saw my expression, "Do you know that most of the people in here were actually acquainted with him during school?"

"Great." I mumbled sarcastically as I crossed my arms. Fuji put an arm around my shoulders and smiled. "Don't worry about it. We won't spread the fact that his ex-wife is here, for we know how many people might try and kill you just to get to him." He joked casually as he looked around. I smiled lazily and looked at the informer, "I'm sorry…" I apologized to him for my earlier action.

"I am Yanagi Renji." He introduced himself with a light bow. "Everyone calls me Renji, please do so as well, Mishima-san."

I acknowledged him with a bow of my own and found Fuji looking at Yukimura. "Where is your lovely fiancé?" he asked curiously. "I can't see her."

"She is lecturing Masaharu on the balcony." He answered simply as he put his hands in his pockets. "Apparently he was a cause of some screams earlier." He said with a shrug. "I'll go mingle with the guests and thanks for coming." He said leaving us. I stood there with Fuji and the new man called Renji. I was going to start a light conversation when Fuji started. "Isn't Niou older now for pranks?" he asked Renji in an inquiring tone. Renji actually smiled at that statement, "Masaharu is Masaharu, and he will never change."

"He's got somewhat of a bad boy reputation in his industry."

Renji rubbed his jaw as he thought for a minute. "True, but we make sure to keep him at bay."

Fuji looked around, "I don't see Sanada either." He remarked as he redirected his gaze at Renji. "I am sure a 100% that he is with Aya to make sure that she doesn't kill Masaharu." He said confidently as he walked away. As soon as Renji left, Fuji turned to me. "Interesting, Mishima." He murmured, "Standing in front of me is Atobe Keigo's ex-wife."

"Believe me that title is not as high and mighty as it sounds."

"I can imagine since you're his ex-wife now."

I let out a sigh and grimaced as well. "Let's…let's not talk about him anymore." I said quietly as he witnessed my discomfortness. Keigo wasn't exactly on my list of pleasant things to talk about at the moment. I just couldn't believe that I was mingling in his school circle. Life was indeed ironic. We spent some time mingling when I suddenly found myself alone. "Where is Fuji?" I whispered as I walked along the crowd. I frowned when I couldn't find him so I found myself going towards the balcony and decided to get some fresh air, but as I walked out I stopped.

"Niou, I am still disappointed in you." I heard a feminine voice scold in a very disapproving tone. "You promised you wouldn't do anything tonight."

I was on the balcony and there were three people on it, but they had not acknowledged my presence yet. A beautiful woman stood between two men. One was tall and handsome with dark hair and a serious face while the other with long silver hair was leaning on the banister without a care. My observation concluded that the woman was scolding the silver haired one who wore a suit, but it was very untidy attire. His shirt was un tucked, his tie was loose, and in one hand he had a small glass of a drink while a cigarette in the other. "Che… being engaged to my friend doesn't make you my mother."

She was going to slap him when someone caught her arm. "Aya, no." the other man said quietly. "Let's go back inside." He ordered as he pulled her away from Niou. They were about to turn when Aya snatched the glass from Niou, "At least make sure you don't get drunk. I know for a fact that you can't handle more than two glasses."

I was going to move since I could see them turning to leave, but a hand was placed firmly on my shoulder. "I'd like to introduce you." Yukimura Seiichi said rooting me in my place. I turned to him, "I'm sorry."

"Don't worry; I know you weren't here on purpose." He said kindly as Aya walked towards us with the other man. Aya's eyes looked furious, but the minute they settled on us, or more so on her fiancé, they softened. "Seiichi…"

"Don't worry, Aya." Yukimura said softly as he put an arm around her. "This is your special day."

"Our special day." She corrected sweetly as she held his jaw lightly. Yukimura smiled and looked at me. "Mishima Fay, this is my one and only Sawada Aya." He introduced as I shook her hand and congratulated her, "And this is Sanada Genichirou."

"His other one and only." Aya winked mischievously. She watched me, "Who did you come here with?' she asked curiously. "Fuji Syuusuke." I answered. Aya blinked at my answer, "Oh, but…"

"I know." I said quietly. "We're just friends."

Aya and I exchanged some conversation and then she excused herself with Yukimura. I stood there alone with Sanada, "I just came out to get some fresh air." I explained, "I didn't mean to listen on to your conversation earlier."

He nodded, "it is alright.' He replied back to me, I realized he wasn't a man that spoke a lot. In a while, he bowed and left as well. I found myself on the balcony, but not alone. The other man was still there, but he wasn't one that looked like he gave a damn, so I walked further and relaxed as a cool gush of wind hit me. It was comforting. I tried to ignore the other man, but my curiosity made me glance his way. He had still not acknowledged me and I don't think he was planning to. I walked closer to the railing…

"I wouldn't if I were you."

I stopped when I heard him speak. I looked at him, but his eyes weren't even on me. I pursed my lips as I thought what he meant by that. I ignored and I walked closer, but he spoke again. "Come closer to me and I might contaminate you."

"I'm not even walking towards you." I retorted annoyed by his lame comments, I leaned by the railing and in a minute I lost my grip at the sudden loose railing that I had failed to notice, "Shit…" I whispered, but he caught my arm and pulled me roughly towards him. I tripped forward and ended up in his arms. "The railing is loose." He said uninterested.

I pushed him away and glared at him, "You could've told me that you know."

He continued smoking and just leaned on his side. He finally looked at me and his eyes studied me carefully. He actually had the audacity to just look intently at me from head to toe and making me feel like I was being undressed. I reflexively hugged myself and looked away. "Pervert." I whispered feeling self-conscious.

"You don't even know me." He muttered flatly as he reassumed to his smoking. It's true that I didn't know him, but that fact that he looked at me that way made my skin feel prickly. I narrowed my eyes and looked at him, "Yes, I don't." I agreed, "And let's keep it that way." I added curtly as I turned to go away, but I found myself being pulled back. "This is very remarkable." He whispered in my ears. "You've got an attitude that I can live with, lady."

I let out a sigh. Why do I always find myself in this position when I meet someone new? I wondered. I put my hand on the arm around me, ready to dig my nails into it. "Do…you…mind?"

He let go of me as I moved away from him breathing hard. He was hitting my nerves way more than I wanted him to. Why is it that I always attracted the pushy ones? I thought wryly as I shook my head to clear my thoughts. I turned to leave, but his statement made me stop. "Mishima Fay, you will dance with me tonight, will you not?" he asked from where he stood. I didn't even glance at him, but just continued walking off.

When I walked in, I found Fuji. "Hey.' He said casually taking my hand. "I thought you bailed." He admitted as he took me to the refreshment table. We nibbled on some light snacks and conversed for a while. Although my encounter with that obnoxious man annoyed me I was starting to feel really good now. "You have good friends." I remarked, "But I am interested in how you know them so well."

He sipped his drink and looked at me. "I know Yukimura from school." He answered my curiosity. "However, we didn't know each other that well because he was rather ill. Since he spent most of his time in the hospital when he was younger and could not participate in lot of tennis tournaments, he decided to go pro to make up for all the time he wasted."

"You seemed to know his fiancé well too." I remarked from my previous observation. He smiled at that comment, "Aya's agency represents me." He replied, "She owns it."

"Interesting."

"Did you know that she is affiliated with your ex-husband as well?" he asked casually watching me. "Atobe's company is diversified into many things and her industry is one of them as well. Plus, I know for a fact they dated for a while…"

His last comment made me sputter my drink. I coughed a bit and looked at him grimly. 'I did not need to know that piece of information." I said sarcastically as he watched me innocently. "Good for her though, she has a wonderful fiancé now while I'm stuck by looking at my ex-husband almost everyday."

Fuji rubbed his jaw as he continued smiling, then he looked at me with his eyes open, 'I remember that he had a son, are you…"

"Oh! They're playing my favorite song!" I interrupted as I grabbed his hand. "Let's dance." I ordered as I dragged him to the dance floor. I could see that Yukimura and his fiancé were already in their own little world as they danced. Fuji took control as he put a hand on my waist and held my other hand, "Didn't you say that you loathed dancing once?"

I shrugged as I danced with him. I didn't want to into details of my son with anyone. It was bad enough that they knew I was married to Keigo, but I just didn't want anyone to know. I might be making a big deal out of it, but what if Fuji asked me that he wanted to see Rai? What am I supposed to tell him? My own son doesn't know that I'm his mother? I thought wryly. Whatever he was going to ask he didn't. I knew that he knew I was trying to avoid the question and I admired him for not pushing it. We danced quietly to the music. He was a good dancer and made me like dancing. He was right about me hating dancing, but it felt fun tonight. I was so into that I did not realize someone was standing next to us till Fuji stopped. "May I cut in?"

Piercing blue eyes looked at me treacherously. I turned to Fuji and saw that he was not happy at being interrupted, but he was more of a gentleman and did not want to cause a scene. "I'm not sure I should hand this lady over to you, Niou." He remarked calmly. Niou crossed his arms and didn't look fazed one bit, "Why don't we let the lady make a decision?"

I looked from Fuji to Niou. Something told me that if I didn't go with Niou then something terrible would happen. I already felt like I was intruding so I didn't want to be the cause of an uproar at someone else's engagement. "Fuji…" I said softly hating myself for saying the next words. "I'll give Niou-san this dance."

Fuji studied me and finally nodded. "Please be on your best behavior, Niou." He warned in a low threatening tone as he walked off.

The minute Fuji left I turned to Niou and glared at him. "I hate you." I told him bluntly as he stood in front of me. He didn't say anything, but just took my hand and led me to the corner of the dance floor away from the others. Before I could protest or even say anything, one arm came around me pulling me close and the other held my hand. However, that move left me with the predicament of where to put my other hand. "Afraid to come close to me?" he whispered in my ears as he saw me struggling where to put my free hand. On reflex my hand went on his shoulder and he vulgarly pulled me even closer as he moved to the music. The whole time my gaze was at his chest, for I refused to look at him and unlike how comfortable I was with Fuji while I danced, I was stiff right now. "Relax, Mishima. If I wanted to eat you I'd certainly not do it in public."

I looked up at him, "You're really trying to vex me, aren't you?" I demanded as I let my eyes pierce through his. He chuckled and being so close to him I could actually feel the light rumble of his chest as he did that. "Rest assured that I know that you're already irritated with me."

"Then why…" I began, but he held my chin gently and looked at me as he lifted my face. "Because Mishima Fay, you interest me." He said bluntly, "Probably the first woman who hasn't thrown herself at me, of course Aya is an exception as well, but oh well…" he shrugged.

I stopped and moved my face away from his hand. "I am not interested." I said through gritted teeth. Who did he think he was parading himself like that to me? Is he trying to tell me that women worship him all the time and I should be flattered that he finds me attractive? I wasn't vexed at the moment, I was beyond displeased. The corner of his mouth lifted and formed a grin. His eyes narrowed as he placed one hand on his hip. "It doesn't matter what you think because I always get what I want."


	4. Chapter 4

Apart from the fact that I enjoyed the engagement party last night, I was still annoyed in the morning when I woke up. We had stayed late and Niou had stuck close to me all night. Although he left me once the dance was over, but he was in my range of vision every time I conversed with someone. I wasn't sure if he was doing it on purpose or if it was pure coincidence. Fuji was just the best; he even invited me to the beach the week after as he was having a barbecue in honor of his brother's promotion.

I stepped out of my bedroom and decided that today was going to be a good day. I left Sai sleeping on my bed and peeked in on Rai and to my surprise I found him reading on the bed. "Good morning," I said cheerfully, walking into the room and standing next to him. "What are you reading?" I asked casually as I leaned down a bit.

He looked up and blushed as he saw me catching him reading. "Um…I am reading this," he admitted showing me a comic book. Now I understood why he looked embarrassed. I knew if Keigo found a comic book among his things, he would throw a fit. I patted his head tenderly. "It will be our little secret," I whispered playfully as I winked.

He smiled genuinely and nodded.

"Do you want some breakfast?" I asked as I opened the room's curtains a bit to allow some light in. I didn't want him reading in the dark. I turned back and found him absorbed in his comic book. I smiled and walked out, I found a sleeping Jirou walking out of the guest room rubbing his eye. "Your one and only?"

"Sleeping," he muttered wryly as he walked to the kitchen.

I followed Jirou into the kitchen and began preparing breakfast. It was starting to be a daily chore for me, but I didn't mind.

The rest of the day went smoothly. I was grateful for Kaede and Jirou's company. They were a blessing and the children loved them. Jirou was exceptionally good with kids. He even took them out to the park so Kaede and I could have some free girl time together. "So?" Kaede began as she chopped some vegetables for dinner. We were both in the kitchen preparing a Chinese dinner. "You never told us who you went with last night."

"A man I met."

Kaede rinsed some carrots and began chopping them as I soaked the noodles in the pot. "A man we shall see more of?" she asked curiously. I looked at her. "We're not like that," I explained quietly. "He is already in a relationship and we are only friends."

"I'm sure if you spend some time….."

"He's in a relationship with a man."

"That's nice," she remarked absently as she chopped, then she stopped. "I hope you know what you're doing." She said softly as she looked at me. "What are you doing spending time with him then?"

"I know you're not fond of same-sex relationships," I said as I boiled the noodles. "Please don't judge him like that because he is one of the best guys I've met," I said truthfully. I was appreciative that she did not push the matter any further.

"Jirou and I will leave tomorrow, Fay," Kaede finally spoke breaking the silence. "We're going to Yuushi's house to meet Kabaji and will probably spend the night there."

"And Kabaji is involved because?"

She smacked me lightly on the head. "Silly! Did you forget the Kabaji owns a movers company?" she reminded me, exasperated. "He offered to send some of his boys to help Yuushi with the move," she explained as she prepared the ingredients for spring rolls. "We're going to pack some of his stuff since he gave us solid instructions."

"Do you guys need help?" I offered.

Kaede shook her head, "Nope," she answered shaking her head. "You tend to the kids," she ordered, looking at me. "Now tell me. Did you meet anyone interesting last night?"

When I heard her question, Niou's face immediately popped into my mind. I groaned inwardly as I shook my head. "No," I answered curtly. "I did not meet anyone that interested me."

If my tone of voice indicated anything, Kaede didn't question me further about it. We talked more about many things and prepared the dinner table for us and Jirou and the kids when they get back. Today was indeed a good day.

Several days went by and the depression phase has almost passed. Kaede and Jirou had left and the kids were back to their own homes. Yuushi had finally moved and Sai seemed better since she lived below me. She'd come over sometimes and just stay over. I knew she missed her mother and I knew she just wanted to be with someone. Keigo had even offered to take her in during the weekends so she could spend it with Rai, but Yuushi declined graciously and said he'd rather keep Sai with him so they can spend the weekend together.

I was now home alone. I pursed my lips trying to think of what to do. I didn't really work; money was not an issue to me because I did work and invested a lot when I was younger and made a huge profit. Since I was also Rai's mother, a settlement went into my account as well, but I never touched it. However, it was there for backup. I did make money by selling my paintings as well. In my spare time, I paint on silk and sell them off to some galleries if they are interested.

Now I sat on my sofa, bored. I tapped my chin trying to think of what to do when my phone interrupted me. I picked it up without even bothering to check the caller ID. "Hello?"

"Found you."

I froze in place. As if by reflex, I immediately hung up. I stood, clutching my hand, and was going to walk away when it rang again. I hesitated, but picked it up. I didn't say anything though.

"Don't you know it's considered offensive to hang up just like that?"

The comment angered me. "What the devil are you doing calling me?" I demanded. "And how the hell did you get my number?" I snapped rudely at him.

He chuckled. "Mishima. Mishima. Mishima," he murmured softly. "Did you really think I was going to let you go away?" he asked nonchalantly. "Anyway, to answer your question, we have a rather open source for data if we want anything, but it comes with a price. So you should be privileged that I actually had to cough up some things to get your number."

"Privileged? How can you stalking me be a privilege?" I asked angrily, wanting to slam the phone, but his next comment stopped me. "Che… you really are unappreciative."

I raised my eyebrow. "You don't even know me," I hissed as I hung up the phone. I picked up my jacket and purse and left the house immediately ignoring the ringing telephone. I was fortunate that he did not have my cell phone number.

I spoke too soon. He got my cell phone number.

He called me once or twice, but I always ignored his calls. I was so perturbed that I just didn't know what to do. What did he want from me? Was he doing this so I would keep thinking about him? Even as I changed for Fuji's beach barbecue, I was still thinking about him. I actually wanted to confide in someone, but they would think I was overreacting. I even thought of telling Keigo when I was at Yuushi's making lunch for him and Sai, but I coughed up my tormented mind and told myself I did not want to give him anymore ego boosters.

I finished dressing and picked up my beach bag. Since the venue was at the beach I knew I needed a towel, slippers, extra clothes, and other things that I might need. For my own peace of mind, I decided to leave my cell phone and not take it with me.

The drive to the beach took me well over half an hour. I was also being careful as I drove for it was dark already. The barbecue was in the evening. When I arrived at my destination, I liked the fact that it was secluded. However, I could see a brightly lit spot as I walked and as I got closer I found a lot of people around. They weren't a lot, but at least 50 had occupied the area.

"Fay!"

I breathed in relief as I realized it was Fuji that called me.

"Hey~" I waved cheerfully as he hugged me lightly. Fuji Syuusuke was now what I called a close friend. Although we had known each other for only a short period of time, we clicked immediately and had full respect for each other. He took my hand and pulled me. "Come. I want you to meet Yuuta," he said, referring to his brother. As I whizzed by others I noticed that there were really a lot of people. Finally when Fuji stopped pulling me, I found myself in front of a rather younger man. He was talking to someone in a hostile manner.

"Fay, this is Yuuta." Just as he said it the other man stopped and looked at me. His glaring eyes softened and he actually smiled. "Hello," he said casually, "Thanks for coming."

Astounding transformation! I thought at the sudden change in his eyes. "Congratulations," I said sincerely. "I still don't know yet what you were promoted to…" I admitted as I glanced at Fuji. "He didn't tell me," I said accusingly, as I hit his shoulder lightly.

Yuuta rubbed the back of his head in embarrassment. "I've been promoted to the Sports Manager in my organization," he said sheepishly. "I handle the entire sports event in this region."

I was awestruck. "Impressive," I whispered with a smile and my comment only made him go redder. I spent a good hour with him asking him many things. I also found it hard to believe that he and Fuji were siblings. They were so different, and yet so alike. Finally, he excused himself and I walked around. I didn't really recognize a lot of people and Fuji was nowhere to be found. I was also feeling a bit insecure walking around in my swimming suit, so I decided to tie a sarong around me.

"Mishima."

I turned and found Fuji. He was standing next to another man with a unique hair color. It was silver and black. "This is Saeki Kojirou, a childhood friend of mine," he said. "Saeki, Mishima Fay."

He extended his hand and shook my hand firmly. I realized that Fuji had interesting friends. Or it showed that I lacked proper friends. All his friends seriously had accomplished something and it was commendable to praise them. After conversing with Saeki I walked away a bit to a secluded place. Although I tried to socialize I was still a loner at times, for I needed my space and quiet time. I found a nice little hill and walked up to it, but stopped when I saw three familiar faces. "Oh."

"Mishima-sama." Yukimura Seiichi smiled as he recognized me. He was on the hill with Aya and Renji. "Did you come here to escape as well?" Aya asked moving her hand through her fiancé's hair as he lay with his head on her lap. Renji was just sitting there reading something and holding a flashlight since it was dark.

"I'm sorry, am I intruding?"

"The more the merrier," Yukimura stated as he sat up. "Join us," he said as he scratched his hair lightly. "This is really the only time we can relax," he explained, "So we are taking full advantage of the place."

I chuckled softly as I took a seat next to Renji. "I'm not really into crowds so I needed some space as well," I confided as Aya poured me a drink and handed me a glass. I took it and thanked her. "Fuji's really popular though."

Aya nodded. "Yes."

"According to my data he does have around fifty two friends here and they're all close to him. I still don't see Tezuka though," Renji said with a frown. Aya rolled her eyes. "Yanagi, do you mind not stating data at this hour. I swear… Give it a rest. Why do you always have to know everything?" she asked wryly as she lay down on Yukimura's lap now.

I laughed at that, but suddenly remembered something. "Data?" I whispered recalling what Niou had said to me earlier.

 _we have a rather open source for data if we want anything, but it comes with a price. So you should be privileged that I actually had to cough up some things to get your number_

"Do… Do you charge people for information?" I asked nervously, looking at Renji. "If they were desperate enough." He answered straight away. Aya watched us and smiled. "Interested in someone…?" she was going to ask me, but I interrupted. "You're the one who gave HIM my number." I felt my anger mounting.

Renji turned his head to face me. He rubbed his jaw in puzzlement. "You mean Masaharu?" he asked as he looked at me curiously. Aya sat up straight. "Renji, you gave Niou Fay's number?" she demanded, half amazed and half irritated at that new piece of information. "You know you don't do that to nice ladies." She scolded. She let out a sigh as she saw Renji's indifferent look. Turning to me, Aya smiled weakly. "Just ignore him, Fay."

Yukimura sat up. "Come on, Aya," he said. "Masaharu's not like that." he remarked, "I apologize if you got a bad impression of him, Mishima-sama," he said sincerely. "Niou has a bad way of showing his feelings when he first meets someone."

I thought of what he said, but I had to say it. "I'm sorry, but that man was rude to me and not only me, but you as well." I told Aya softly. "It's none of my business, but I just found it disrespecting."

Aya watched me. "That's normal, Fay," she said. "I'm sorry if I made him sound bad as well, but he is like my little brother."

"Masaharu's two years older than you, Aya," Renji added.

She looked at him sharply. "You know what I meant."

The men went quiet while Aya and I talked about a few things. Keigo did come up a few times, but every time we both instantly changed the subject.

After some time together, I walked back down and decided to mingle. I couldn't help think about what they told me about Niou? Did I judge too fast? I thought as I looked around for Fuji when I bumped into someone and caused the man's drink to spill over his t-shirt. "Oh my god! I'm so sorry!" I said frantically as I pulled out a handkerchief from my beach bag and dabbed at the stain that has formed already.

The person grabbed my wrist stopping me. 'We're at the beach," he said as I looked up at him, but I couldn't see his face. "I'll just take it off," he explained as he removed his shirt. When the head emerged from under the shirt, I saw a mass of long blonde hair. I saw striking dark eyes watching me. "You look like Mishima Fay."

I stopped wondering where that comment came from. "And you know me from…?"

He laughed softly and introduced himself to me. "I'm sorry. I am Tachibana Kippei, a friend of Syuusuke's. I just assumed you were her because I remember him describing you."

I wrinkled my nose at his comment. "Why would Fuji describe me to a complete stranger?" I asked him bluntly. He looked at me in surprise and smiled, "We were discussing women and he said you were the first one he asked out, so I was curious."

I crossed my arms and looked at him. "Why are all of his friends so honest and why is Fuji discussing women?" I asked suspiciously.

Tachibana laughed again and rubbed the back of his head. "You're indeed out of the ordinary, Mishima Fay," he complimented me as he walked away. I watched him as he walked off and thought how peculiar he was. I spent the rest of the evening mingling with everyone, eating, and finally it was time to go home. I thanked Fuji for a wonderful evening as he walked me to my car. "I really had fun," I admitted. "It was a nice change for me."

We stopped by my car and he looked up. "I can't help feel that your smile was not a true one all night," he said out of the blue. "Anything you want to talk about? How's life?"

I surprised him as I smiled. I walked closer to him and hugged him. "You're starting to sound like my other friend. You worry too much about me," I said appreciatively, as he hugged me back lightly. "I don't let my problems bring me down," I told him. "In the past, I might've let it affect me, but not anymore."

He placed a hand on my shoulder. "Good girl."

We talked a bit more and finally I got into my car and left. I admired him and his care free way. He really did worry about me. I drove back home and went into my dark apartment. The first thing I saw was the blinking of my cell phone. I pursed my lips in annoyance and walked towards it. Picking it up, I found many missed calls. One from from Niou. Three from Yuushi and some other ones. I also noticed one message. I opened my inbox and my eyes widened as I read it.

 _"Spend a day with me. If I'm intolerable, I won't ever bother you again. A fair deal, don't you think? Niou XD"_

I narrowed my eyes at the message. Sincere as he sounded, I had a hard time believing it. I deleted the message and switched my phone off. It was late, past midnight, and I wanted to sleep. I took off my clothes and changed into my pajamas. I decided to wear something heavy tonight, for I was feeling a bit chilly.

* * *

Morning arrived faster than I expected. The doorbell woke me. I yawned lazily and sat up. Scratching my hair lightly, I walked to the door and opened it. "Well, you sure are a fright when you wake up."

"Shut up, Yuushi," I grumbled as he walked in with Sai. "What do you want? Its 9 o'clock in the morning," I complained as I fell onto my sofa. Sai walked up to me and kissed my cheeks with a good morning as Yuushi made some coffee in the kitchen. As Sai went to the TV room, Yuushi handed me a cup of coffee. "You promised to take care of Sai today."

I took it and sipped the bitter coffee. I hated coffee, but I knew it was the only thing that would keep me awake. "Hmm… You've been going out a lot lately," he remarked as he took a seat next to me.

I glared at him. "Did you move into my building to keep tabs on me?" I demanded loudly. He chuckled at my comment and stood up. "I'm leaving. I have meetings."

"You might need to invest in a babysitter, Yuushi. I'm not always around."

"I know Fay." He nodded in understanding. "Just give me some time - Sai refuses to be with someone she doesn't know. She doesn't like to stay with Yume either," he said, referring to Rai's nanny.

I stood up. "Yuushi?"

"Yeah?"

I hesitated, but asked. I had to ask. I had the right to. "Whenever you're free, can you tell me about Yume?" I murmured so quietly that I knew he could barely hear me. "Of course," he said as he left me alone with Sai. I let out a sigh and walked back inside. "Sai?" I called out. She ran out of the room and looked at me, "I'm going to shower and change. How about we do some shopping today?" I asked her.

"YES!" she said overjoyed as she ran back to the TV room.

I showered and changed into jeans and a shirt. Since we were going to be shopping, I decided to dress casually. I picked my cell phone and turned it on. I placed my bag and jacket in the living room and was about to call Sai when my doorbell rang again. I looked at the clock and frowned. Did Yuushi forget something? I thought to myself as I walked to the door. I opened it and…

"You don't give up, do you?" I asked as I crossed my arms. I was partially annoyed at him. He was literally stalking me. "Don't you work nor have anything better to do?" I demanded as he invited himself into my apartment. He looked around and whistled, "Nice place."

"Niou!"

"Che…" he whispered. "You really think I'm the type of person to take orders from someone?" he asked as he leaned against the wall and crossed his arms. "I'm a freelancer and a very bored freelancer at the moment," he said as he watched me while he blew at his nails, "You, my lady, interest me and I won't hesitate to make you fascinated by me."

I placed my hands on my hips and narrowed my eyes. "So I'm just a body to keep you entertained because you're bored?"

He shrugged. "Yeah why not?" he muttered, studying his nails. He looked around. "Anyway, don't flatter yourself. I'm not a stalker," he remarked. "I'm here giving out invitations."

"Invitations?"

He took out a card and handed it to me. I looked surprised at the fancy envelope in my hand and opened it. It was a wedding invitation. To Yukimura and Aya's wedding. "Couldn't you just mail it?" I asked suspiciously.

"And not have fun by delivering it personally?" he smirked as he watched me carefully. I was going to say more when we were interrupted. "Fay-chan," Sai whispered softly.

"Is this your daughter?" Niou asked as Sai hid behind me and hugged my leg.

He walked up to Sai and leaned down. "What's your name, angel?" he asked as he patted her head gently. The closer he got, the tighter Sai clutched my leg. "I'm not a bad man."

I looked down at Sai and then at Niou. I don't know why, but Yukimura and Aya's words came back to me. Is he really nice or is it an act to make me like him? Nevertheless, I put my hand behind Sai's back and pushed her forward slightly. "Sweetie, introduce yourself."

Sai looked embarrassed, but nodded. "Oshitari Sai," she said, politely.

Niou smirked, "Yuushi's daughter?" he asked, casually. He took Sai's hand gently and kissed it. "I am Niou Masaharu."

She blushed shyly and I rolled my eyes as I stepped in between the two. "Thank you for delivering the card to me," I said flatly. "You may leave now, for we have plans."

He walked closer to me and angled his lips over mine. I took a step back, but he stopped me with an arm around my waist. "Will you accompany me to the wedding?" he asked softly. I placed the palm of my hands on his chest and looked at him. "No, thank you for inviting me, but I decline."

Niou rubbed his jaw with his free hand. "You really hate me, don't you?" he questioned. "You need to give me a chance before you actually send off hate vibes," he remarked, "I don't know what that ex-husband of yours did to you, but not all men are asses."

His remark was spot on. Did Keigo really screw my thoughts up? I mean I was fine with some men, but I had never really dated anyone since my divorce - Fuji didn't count. I frowned at the thought. I really did hate men. I wasn't ready to be vulnerable again, especially since my emotions were still unstable. Is he the one to help me break it? I thought as I returned Niou's gaze. "What makes you think you're the one to help me? You were very rude and crude when I first met you."

He shrugged. "Bad day, really."

I crossed my arms. "So am I to assume you're going to act like a jerk when you're having a bad day?" I asked out loud. I looked down and found Sai eyeing us curiously. "It won't work," I said softly. "I have so many things going on, it just won't work."

"One day."

I looked up at him. "Huh?"

He crossed his arms and looked at me. "Spend a day with me. That's all I ask."

I was going to shout no, but he sounded so sincere. I hesitated, but looked at him. Again, I remembered his friends' previous remarks about him. I asked him the same question I had asked Fuji, "what do you wish to gain from me by one day?"

He grinned, and leaned forward and kissed me lightly. It was a gentle kiss, lips barely touching and before I could push him away, he pulled away. "We'll just have to wait and see how it goes." He remarked slyly. "I'll text you." he added as he walked out.

* * *

After hours, I looked guiltily at the shopping bags in our hands and let out a sigh. I remembered promising myself to never go shopping when I was upset. I wasn't upset, but shaken. Damn him for kissing me. And damn him for coming into my life. However, when I saw Sai's joyful face as she carried her toys and clothes, I was happy. We had spent the whole day shopping, playing, and had finally settled on some food. I drove us back home just as Yuushi called. "I'm home now," he said over the other end of the phone. "I'll drop her at your apartment then."

He thanked me and said goodbye. We walked to their floor and I found the door open already. "Yuushi?" I called as I walked in. "I'm here," he said as he walked in wearing casual wear. He had changed out of his suit and was only in trainers and a wife beater as he watched us.

"What have you two been up to?" he asked, eyeing our purchases. "Did you leave anything for the city, Fay?" he added dryly.

I rolled my eyes and handed him a bag. "What's this?" He asked as he looked at it. "Your dinner," I answered as I went to the kitchen and took out some plates. "You always forget to eat."

"You need to stop babysitting me."

I pulled my tongue at him and went to check on Sai. She was busy putting her things away with a smile. "Sweetie, let's do this again, okay?"

"Yes," She nodded as she hugged me. "Thank you."

I patted her head gently and suddenly remembered something. "Let's keep what happened to me today our secret, alright?" I said softly to make sure that Yuushi didn't hear me. I did not want Sai telling him about what happened today. Sai looked at me. "Niou-san?"

I nodded and kissed her forehead as she agreed. I walked back out and found Yuushi eating. "I'm heading back." He watched me and nodded. "Thanks, Fay, and you don't need to spend so much on her."

I waved goodbye. "I live to spend, Yuushi," I smiled as I walked to my own apartment. I walked in placing my things on the floor when my cell phone beeped. I checked the message and read…

 _"I'm picking you up at 10 AM tomorrow. Dress casually and get some extra clothes with you. Niou XD"_

I read the message repeatedly. I stared at it, dumbfounded, and immediately without even stopping to think, I replied his message.

 _"Where the hell are you taking me?"_

I walked back to my room and decided to put away my new things tomorrow. I wasn't in the mood to put them away now. As I lay on my bed, I heard the familiar beeping again.

 _"It's a surprise XD Don't worry Niou"_

I threw my cell phone aside and pitied it for all the brutality I put it through. I set my alarm for 9 AM and closed my eyes. I was too tired to change or make myself comfy. I slept and let my dreams take over for the night.


	5. Chapter 5

I was surprised. No, 'surprise' was the wrong word. I was amazed. I walked out of my apartment to meet Niou and found him standing next to a silver 911 GT3 with his arms crossed. "You're late," he remarked as he straightened himself. I didn't say anything as I walked towards him. He was dressed casually in jeans and a t-shirt. "I overslept," I answered flatly as I handed him my bag. It was a small one, but enough to carry some things I needed. I had also tucked a mace spray between my clothes in case I needed it.

"Che… You have attitude even first thing in the morning," he muttered dryly as I got into his car. "I'm not exactly here with pleasant feelings," I retorted as I crossed my arms. "This is kidnapping and assault, if you try anything."

"Mishima Fay," he chuckled softly. "You truly are amazing," he remarked as he brought his car to life. "However, you judge too quickly," he added as he pulled a cigarette from the glove compartment and lit it. I coughed at the smoke and moved my face away. "I don't like the smell of cigarettes."

"We come as a pair."

"Great going, Niou. You just gave me another reason to hate you."

He glanced at me through his sunglasses and smirked, "Hate, hate, and hate. Atobe Keigo must have done a number on you to make you the bitter woman that you are."

My cheeks flared as I turned to look at him. He already made that remark about Keigo earlier and I let it pass. That's it! I thought. I didn't really need to be here and listen to him. I turned to put my hand on the door handle and was actually going to jump out. "I wouldn't if I were you," he said knowingly. "Do you know how fast I'm going? It will only kill you."

"I don't care," I said quietly, looking down. Now that I think about it. What is death? It didn't frighten me really. Everyday that I tried to be happy, I still had a hollow emptiness in my heart. Fuji had been right when he said that my smile was not a true one, but when will it ever be a true one? I let out a sigh and glanced at Niou. What was I doing? I'm in a car with a stranger. I'm in a car with someone that has been stalking me. I'm in a car not knowing where it was heading. Was I really prepared for anything to happen to me?

"Where are we going?" I finally asked, not looking at him. I noticed that we were out of the city now and driving towards the country.

"We're meeting a friend of mine."

That was an unexpected answer. "A friend?"

"You will see," he remarked as he pointed ahead. "We're almost there."

I looked straight ahead and saw a mansion. I don't know why, but it reminded me of Keigo's. Niou drove into the driveway and we were greeted by a butler. "Welcome Niou-sama." The butler bowed respectfully. Niou took off his sunglasses as I walked out of the car, "Where's Hiroshi?" Niou asked as he walked up to the butler with hands in his pockets.

"The young master is by the golf course."

Niou rolled his eyes. "Typical," he muttered as he looked at me. "Come on." He took my hand and led me towards the other end of the house. I was still unsure of what was going on or where I was. He put me in the golf cart and drove. The whole time I was silent. I looked around until we reached a man who was busy practicing golf swings. He stopped as he saw us approach. "Masaharu."

"Yo." Niou grinned as he stood up in the cart and leaned against the window shield. "You're not bored?"

He pushed his glasses up and shook his head. "It relaxes me."

"You're always calm," he muttered as he pulled out a cigarette. He lit it and got out of the car. "Come out," he told me as pulled out a gold club. I looked at him and hesitated. Again I asked myself, what the hell was I doing here? The other man walked towards me.

"I am Yagyuu Hiroshi. Welcome to my home," he said as he shook my hand. "Are you the Mishima Fay that Masaharu's stalking?"

I looked at him in shock. Was he joking? No, I didn't think so. He had said it with all seriousness. I watched Niou as he stood in Yagyuu's place to swing and then back at the man in front of me. I looked at him wryly, "Is there way to make him go away?"

Yagyuu looked at me. "I'm afraid you're stuck with him for a while, Mishima-sama."

I looked at him and realized how different from Niou he was. I glanced at Niou and found him absorbed in the game. I wondered why he brought me here in the first place. Was he up to something? "Why are we here?" I asked him curiously. "I really thought he was going to take me somewhere and lock me up."

"We're here because he wanted me to meet you," he admitted as he watched Niou as well. "He can be quite a jerk to people he meets for the first time, but give him some time to show himself," he said.

"He is still not a saint," I muttered in an annoyed tone.

"That he is not," Yagyuu agreed.

We conversed a bit as Niou busied himself and I realized that they were both the complete opposite of each other. Yagyuu was a total gentleman while Niou, well, he was no gentleman as far that I had seen. I did wonder how in the world they could be such good friends. As we talked, I couldn't help think that the area was too familiar. "Where are we exactly?" I asked as Niou finally joined us.

Yagyuu rubbed his jaw and looked around. "We're at the outskirts of the city, a lot of country homes are here," he answered, looking at me. "I believe Atobe's is two houses away."

I grimaced. No wonder it all looked familiar. And as heaven's door shut and the ironic gateway of life opened, we actually saw my ex-husband on his horse exploring the area. What made me really want to die was seeing my own son riding alongside his father. I looked away as Keigo spotted us and actually came towards us.

"Yagyuu." Atobe nodded in courtesy as he reached us. "Niou, Fay…."

Yagyuu nodded back. "Hello Atobe," he said, casually. "Good day isn't it? And the young one?" he said looking at Rai.

Rai nodded and then looked at me. "Fay-chan!" he exclaimed, waving. I smiled and waved back. "I didn't know you ride, Rai," I said proudly as I watched my baby all grown up. He smiled proudly as well. I looked at Keigo and found him looking at me, but with a weird look in his eyes. "You're acquainted with these two _gentlemen?"_

I frowned. Somehow the way he said "gentlemen" made me think that there was a tone of disapproval in his voice. I narrowed my eyes. "Yes," I answered softly as I crossed my arms. As I said those words, I felt an arm around my shoulders. "We'll see you later," Niou replied as he turned me around. "Yagyuu, we'll meet you for lunch."

As Niou dragged me away from them, I felt my heart beating really fast. Keigo must probably think… I thought and then suddenly stopped and yanked my hand away from Niou's grip once we were out of eyesight. "Why did you do that?" I demanded as he turned to look at me. "He thinks…"

"Tell me something, Mishima," he said seriously. "Why is a son calling his mother by her first name?"

I stopped. I did not expect that. I seriously did not expect that question. I swallowed my pride and forced a light smile. "I… I'm not his mother," I said softly. I couldn't believe that those words actually left my mouth. Niou took my hand and pulled me towards him. "The boy has nothing of Atobe in him. You're clearly his mother, so why lie about it?"

I looked away. I didn't really know what to say. I clutched my fist and felt a tremor run through me. "Niou…" I said quietly, "Let's….let's not…." I stopped. "I'd rather not talk about it."

He narrowed his eyes and walked closer to me.

"Do you mi…" I asked as he backed me against a wall.

"You're a very complicated woman." He remarked in my ears. "A tough shell to break as well," he said as he leaned over and placed his lips on mine.

My eyes widened as he kissed me softly, I reached my hands out in instinct and pushed him away. "You're an asshole! Taking advantage of me like that."

He shrugged. "A woman cries, I don't really know what to do, so I kiss her."

"I wasn't crying!" I hissed angrily as I looked away. He put an arm around my shoulders.

"Let's go to the pool," he suggested as he pulled me away. As we reached the pool area, I remembered that I didn't have my swimming suit with me.

"I didn't bring a bathing suit with me."

"Have no fear," he said as he took out something from a bag and threw it at me. I held something that looked like a piece of string.

"What the hell is this supposed to be?" I demanded trying to understand what it was. He looked at me innocently.

"It's a bikini."

I threw the thing back at him. "You have a crude sense of humor," I said, disgusted. "Do you really want to see me naked that much?"

He smirked slightly and took off his shirt. "If I wanted to see you naked, I will do it with your consent," he replied back. "I don't need to resort to cheap tricks."

I didn't like his reply. It sounded so sincere; I was really confused about him. He confused me. I had gotten such bad vibes from him before, but now he was actually showing good ones. Again, Yukimura and Aya's words haunted me. And not only that, but even Yagyuu's. They all spoke of him like they knew another side of him. I didn't like his pushy attitude and the fact that he wouldn't leave me alone, but I wasn't going to allow him in. I had promised myself I wouldn't let anyone in. I was going to say something to him when my cell rang. I dug it out of my bag and picked it up.

"Hello."

"I'm surprised that you're up early."

I smiled. "I'm not a lazy ass, Yuushi," I said lightly. "I had a d…" I stopped. "I went out with a friend," I explained as I saw Niou in his swimming trunks. He was talking to Yagyuu who had joined him. "So is this a social call?" I asked cheerfully.

"Yes and no," he replied. "I do worry about you, so that's the social part of it and I also want to let you know that Rai's spending the night with us. So do you want to join us for dinner later on?"

My heart skipped a beat. I love you, Yuushi! I thought to myself. "Yes! Thank you!" I said sincerely, almost in tears. "I'd love to join you," I replied excitedly as I held onto my cell phone. "I'll come over as soon as I get back home."

He agreed and let me go. I saw Niou dive into the pool, leaving Yagyuu standing there. "You can change in the shower room, Mishima-san," Yagyuu said. "There are more decent suits in there."

"You seem to know him well," I remarked, as he walked me to the shower room. He looked at me and nodded. "Yes, he was my tennis doubles partner during middle school and I've known him since then."

"I see," was all I said as I went in. I opened a closet and found a lot of swimming suits in there. It made me think of one of those swimsuit parties. I tried to find one that would cover me whole. I wasn't exactly comfortable parading myself in a swimming suit, but I wanted to at least and try get through the day. I finally put on a one piece bathing suit and walked out. I found Yagyuu gone and Niou sitting by the edge of the pool side. He had one leg bent and the other in the water as he smoked. He looked like he was in deep thought as he smoked. He finally noticed me as I approached him. I took a seat next to him and hugged my knees. "I really don't like cigarettes, Niou."

He exhaled and put it out casually as he leaned on his elbows. "Having fun?" he asked as I moved my legs into the water and splashed a bit. "It's relaxing," I admitted, "and I like Yagyuu, he's nice."

"Unlike me, I'll bet," he said as he looked up at the sky. He sat up and said something unexpected. "Well, its good to see you relaxed. Even after the disapproving look your ex-husband gave you."

I watched him carefully and frowned. "If you think I care what Keigo thinks about how I spend my time then you're wrong about me," I remarked haughtily with a flip of my hair.

"I'm going to test something," he grinned as he suddenly sat up.

"Test wha….mph…."

He was kissing me, but not the light kisses he had given me earlier. What can I say? It was different. One thing I knew for sure, he wasn't hesitating in it at all. "Kiss me back…" he ordered between kisses as he continued. My mind was screaming no, but my body responded to his command. The next thing I knew, his hands were roaming around and he had me on the floor.

"Ow…" I winced as I felt the hard cold floor of the poolside stick into my back while he kissed me. He didn't even apologize as he continued kissing me. He had one hand on my bare thighs and was almost on top of me. Without thinking, I held his hand, stopping him from moving it further up my thighs and looked at him while my other hand placed itself firmly on his mouth.

To my surprise, his eyes gleamed and I could tell he was smiling behind my hand. "I was wondering at what stage you would stop me," he remarked, sitting up. He helped me sit up and hugged me. "Let's cool off, don't you think?" he grinned as he rolled us into the pool

* * *

My day was unusual. That's how I'm going to describe it. I was not only physically exhausted, but emotionally as well. Niou Masaharu had played with my emotions all day. One minute he was someone nice, the next he was almost a jerk, and then he would change again. He confused me to no end. One minute he would be pushy and impulsively kiss me, and then he distances himself. I felt like I was on a game show or like he was testing me trying to analyze me in all different situations.

I still scolded him every time he tried kissing me. Even though I responded to him, but I just met him and I didn't know him that well to be locking lips with him. I hated myself for responding to him. I blame his friends for putting all those nice things about him into my head.

The last straw was when he hinted about spending the night, but I rudely declined. He took it as a joke and said that one night it will happen. I told him even if it did then my mind would never be occupied with him. I let out a sigh. It was nerve-wracking. I looked at my watch and saw that it was seven in the evening. I really did spend a lot of time with him today and I don't know how he did it, but he had managed to make me his date to the wedding as well.

I lazily walked back to my apartment and changed into something comfy. I picked up my cell, picked up me keys and headed to Yuushi's. I was exhausted, but I ignored it, for Rai was an important person to me and I would take every opportunity to be with him. I knocked on the door and to my surprise, Keigo opened it. He just grunted and allowed me in. I looked around and found the children playing on the Playstation, but Yuushi was nowhere in sight. "Where is he?"

Keigo fell on the sofa and lifted his feet onto the foot rest. "He forgot some things at the office, he had to rush and get them."

"And you're gracefully babysitting?" I asked disbelievingly wondering why Keigo was here. He glared at me.

"He did come to you, but I told him you were busy with those two _nice_ men," he drawled as he closed his eyes. I cursed softly at his tone. What did he think I was? That I was some kind of whore playing around with two men? I wanted to kill him, but I held onto my temper.

"That still doesn't explain why you're here, of all people."

"Che…" he muttered as he ran a hand through his hair. "I was dropping Rai off and ended up doing it," he said with a sigh. I put my hands on my hips and looked around the kitchen. There was nothing prepared. Didn't Yuushi say dinner? I thought as I rummaged through the kitchen.

"Don't bother," Atobe explained as he folded his hands. "Yuushi is bringing food with him. He wanted to cook, but then had to go."

I smiled at that. "At least he can cook…"

My comment made him open his eyes. He sat up straight and looked at me.

"Are you referring to me by any chance?" he asked with a tone of annoyance in his voice.

"Do you see any other grown up men who can't cook in here?" I answered mockingly. Not once did he even bother in the kitchen.

He stood up. "Why do I even bother?" he asked himself as he walked to the door. "I don't have to be here anymore." He put on his jacket. "Rai! I'm leaving."

The boy walked towards him and hugged his leg lightly, I could've sworn I saw something tender in Keigo's eyes as he patted his head gently and turned around. "Bid Yuushi good night for me.' he said leaving and I winced as he slammed it shut.

"He takes things too personally…" I remarked as I joined the children. They were so into their Playstation game that I was starting to get bored. My muscles were too relaxed and I kept yawning as I sat with my legs crossed on the floor with them.

I didn't even know I had fallen asleep until Yuushi woke me up. "I'm not sure if that's responsible of you." he remarked as I sat up dazed.

"I fell asleep?" I whispered, suddenly feeling my head spinning. He held me lightly. "Yes," he answered, "and this young man kept you comfortable." He explained that Rai had my head on his lap while Sai had covered me with her jacket.

Rai smiled.

I held my head and felt greatly embarrassed. I was watching the kids. How could have I fallen asleep? Great going, Fay. Yuushi will probably never ask you to take care of the kids again.

"I'm sorry," I said and I was surprised that my voice came out hoarse. Yuushi placed his hand on my forehead.

"You have a fever, Fay," he observed softly and I noticed the kids watching me worriedly.

"I'll be fine…" I said as I tried to sit up properly, but I felt drained. Within a second, I found myself being lifted as though I weighed nothing.

"Yuushi…" I began, not even having the energy to argue. He walked to one of the bedrooms and placed me on the bed. "Get some sleep," he ordered as Sai and Rai each sat on the bed next to me. Yuushi covered me with a blanket, tucking me in properly and told the kids to leave.

When Yuushi left the room, he found two pairs of concerned eyes watching him.

"Will Fay-chan be alright?" Sai asked quietly as she held Rai's hand. Yuushi bent down and looked at her.

"Of course," he answered. "She's just tired and needs to rest. You guys can sleep in her room if you're worried about her."

They nodded excitedly as he stood up. "Let's eat now, I brought Pizza with me."

"Fay-chan didn't eat," Rai said as they sat around the kitchen table while Yuushi put out some plates. "I'll keep some in the oven for her; she'll eat when she wakes up."

That seemed to satisfy him. They all ate in silence and when done, the kids helped put the dishes away as Yuushi washed them. Rai and Sai then went to change into their pajamas and brush their teeth. Even before Yuushi told them to go to bed, both kids were already asleep on either side of Fay. There was a teddy bear in Sai's arms while Rai held onto Fay's hand. He let out a sigh and covered them all properly and walked out.

He actually wanted to speak with Fay today, but he guessed it had to wait. He didn't know what she was doing with her time or how he was going to approach this subject with her. After trying with Atobe, he had finally let go of his stubbornness and agreed to some things concerning Rai, but today Atobe seemed to be fuming about something and altered his mind again. He wanted to talk to Fay about what could have caused that. He wasn't one to really butt into other people's lives, but he could see the situation was hurting them both. Even Atobe, who claimed that he can handle parenthood on his own, found it difficult in some cases. Yuushi could finally relate to that now, since Yui was gone.

He picked up the things the kids had scattered over the floor and put them in their original place. As he cleaned up, he heard a cell phone ring. Knowing that the ring tone wasn't his, he looked around and found that it was Fay's. He picked it up to silence it and found that the caller was Kaede. Since he knew her, he picked it up.

"Hello."

"Oh!" came Kaede's voice. "Somehow I'm not surprised that you two ended up together."

Oshitari frowned. "If I pick up Fay's phone that doesn't mean I'm sleeping with her," he remarked. _What did she exactly mean by 'I'm not surprised',_ he thought, bothered. He ignored the remark. "Fay's here because Rai's spending the night, but she's sort of not feeling well so they're all asleep."

"Oh, what's wrong?"

"She is slightly feverish," he answered as he sat down. "Don't worry, she's fine."

"That's good," said Kaede. "What about you, Yuushi?" she asked, concerned. Coping?"

He rubbed his hair slightly. "Yeah," he answered. "I've been busy and I'm indebted to Fay for being here - it helps Sai a lot," he admitted.

"That's nice. Actually I'm glad you picked up the phone," she said, thankfully, "Jirou and I wanted to invite you guys over for next weekend. We always come to you guys, but you never visit."

He chuckled. "That would be nice actually. Who else is going to be there?" he asked as he stood up. He felt his muscles aching and couldn't sit or stand still as he walked around the living room.

"Well Choutarou said he will definitely come, because he misses everyone. I know Gakuto will just drop by for a while because he has a lot of work to do."

Oshitari nodded. "Sounds like a plan," he said. The two of them spoke for a while and then finally bid each other good night. Just as he hung up, he heard something in the guest room.

When I woke up I felt like a thousand drums were playing in my head. I was going to sit up when I felt something holding onto my hand while another was at my back. I blinked several times till I realized it was Rai and Sai. Sighing, I rolled to the side and watched my baby sleep soundly, still holding my hand. I felt a tug at my heart as I reached out with my other hand and caressed his cheek.

"Are you feeling better?"

I sat up and found Yuushi leaning by the door. "I'm sorry," I apologized as I got off the bed quietly so I would not wake the children up. "I feel like such a mess." He touched my forehead. "Well, your fever is gone," he said in a tone that showed he was relieved. "Why don't we feed you now?"

I smiled at him and nodded as I followed him to the kitchen. "That's normally my line," I added as I took a seat on the kitchen table.

"True," he agreed as he heated the pizza for a few minutes, "but we can spoil you once in a while," he placed the plate in front of me.

It smelled like heaven. In my current state, even cold pizza would satisfy my hunger. I ate it slowly, enjoying the taste as Yuushi made some tea for the both us. I laughed; he really knew his way around the kitchen. I doubt Keigo would even know where the utensils are. Suddenly, I remembered something.

"Yuushi?"

"Yes."

"I think Keigo's mad."

He looked at me. "I figured," he said. "Did something happen between you two some days back?"

I blinked. "Huh? What are you saying?" I asked, confused, as I munched on my pizza, "I meant that earlier today, I made fun of his cooking abilities and he stormed off."

Oshitari rubbed his jaw. "Hmm… not quite. He's actually been mad all day today." He went on to say, "and I got the feeling you were involved because we were talking about Rai's care and he sort of agreed a week ago so you can watch him over the weekend, but today he changed his mind."

My boy? In my care? All weekend? I was delighted, but then stopped feeling joy. "Why would he change his mind? What did he say, Yuushi?"

"He said something about the company you're in, but I really don't know what he…."

"Oh my god! He meant Niou!" I gasped, as I covered my mouth and recalled today's incident.

Yuushi actually stopped and looked me. "Niou? Do you mean Niou Masaharu?" he asked, taken aback, as he poured tea for the both of us. "How on earth are you acquainted with Niou?" he questioned as he placed a cup in front of me.

I groaned inwardly. "I met Niou at an engagement party I went to with Fuji," I explained, feeling another headache coming, "and I spent the day with him today." I decided not to go into details of how I actually ended up going with him.

He placed himself next to me on the chair. "Which brings me to my next question: How do you know Fuji, assuming it's Fuji Syuusuke we're talking about."

"I met him when I was at the hospital."

Oshitari rubbed his temples. "It's like middle school all over again," he mumbled. "It does explain Atobe's attitude though. Niou doesn't exactly have the best reputation."

"You really need to know him better, you can't just judge him like that," I said without thinking then I stopped. Oh my god! Did I just defend Niou? I thought horrified. I stood up abruptly. This is bad. This is definitely bad, I thought as I walked into the living room, holding my head. It made me think, why was Keigo mad? He really didn't have any right to be. I looked at Yuushi who followed me. "What business of Keigo's in who I spend my day with?"

"I imagine he's thinking of Rai's welfare."

His comment made me laugh sarcastically, almost hysterically. "Welfare? Welfare?" I asked over and over as I walked over to Yuushi and clutched the front of his shirt. "If he really cared for Rai's wellbeing then he wouldn't keep him away from me," I whispered, annoyed. "plus it doesn't matter who I spend my time with, it's not like my son is every waking hour with me." The minute I said it, I felt sadness. It was as if my sentence confirmed that to me. I let go of Yuushi's shirt and plumped myself onto the sofa.

"Are you and Niou serious?"

I swore softly. "No! No! No!" I exclaimed, "It's not like that! I met the man once and he took me out today! That's it!" I answered as I stood up. "Yuushi, Niou is definitely not someone I'm going to see seriously."

He put his hands in his pockets and eyed me carefully. "Then why did you go out with him?"

I stood up and saw my phone blinking on the living room table. "I don't know," I admitted. "It's complicated." I picked up my phone. I found one message and opened it.

 _"Today was fun! Thanks! I'll call you before the wedding so we can decide how to go. Niou XD"_

I looked at the message, irritated. Why was he so damn nice? The more I try not to like him, the harder it is for me. I decided not to answer. I actually wanted to put it past me and not talk about Niou anymore or see him. Why did I agree to the wedding? Because he asked you while he was kissing you, my mind reminded me sarcastically.

"Fay?"

I shook my thoughts away. "Yuushi…" I said softly as I walked up to him and kissed his cheek. "Thank you for tonight," I thanked him sincerely. "I'm going to head back to my own apartment. I need to resolve some things. I'll come by tomorrow before Rai leaves."

"I'll walk you back."

I shook my head. "The kids are alone," I objected. Plus, I did not want him discussing Niou with me anymore. I was already perplexed as it is. I picked up my things and walked out of his apartment. I went to mine and went straight to my bed. Why was I feeling like this? Why was my mind confused? I hugged my pillow tightly and shut my eyes tightly. I wanted these thoughts to go away. I shuddered as my mind asked me the question I was dreading all day.

 _Are you starting to like Niou?_


	6. Chapter 6

In the morning, Yuushi had come to my place. I tried not to show what a grouch I was as I helped Rai make his sandwich. Niou kept visiting in my dreams and I was annoyed as hell. I tried keeping him out by not sleeping, but it didn't work. "Oh, I forgot," he remembered suddenly. "Kaede called and invited us to go over next weekend."

"Jirou-kun's house?!" Sai asked excitedly almost dropping her sandwich. "It's fun! They have ponies! Jumping castles!" she exclaimed with a huge smile on her face.

Rai looked at Sai. "Can I come?"

Oshitari placed a hand on his shoulder. "Your father is invited as well," he told the boy. "If he can't come, we'll take you," he said sincerely as Rai smiled happily. "What about you, Fay?"

I frowned. "I'm invited to a wedding that day," I answered as I remembered Aya's wedding and it was a celebration I wanted to go to. "I'll drive with my own car after the wedding."

"Drive carefully," he advised me. "It will be late by the time you finish. If you want, I'll come back and pick you up."

I thanked him, but said no. There was no way I was going make him drive back and forth like that. It was a three-hour drive. They stayed for a while and finally left. I looked around and let out a sigh. I was bored. I tried to think of what to do when I suddenly decided that I might as well shop for a dress for the wedding and spoil myself by getting a new phone. I also decided that I could use some company for lunch. I looked at my cell phone and began text-ing.

 _"Fuji, want to have lunch?"_

I found myself at the mall. I was browsing through some boutiques when I heard my cell phone beep.

 _"Sure. And do you want me to forward the message to your Fuji-kun as well? Niou XD"_

I froze. No, I felt like my knees were going to give in. I felt the color drain from my cheeks. Did I…did I send that message to Niou? No, please tell me I sent it to someone else. Please tell me I sent it to someone else. I thought repeatedly as I checked the number over and over again and found it to be Niou's. Damnit, why did I save it in the first place? I need to sit down. I need to sit down; I thought as I walked out of the boutique and sat on one of the benches.

Beep

 _"So, where is my princess now? I'll meet you in an hour. And no I'm not going to ignore this message and save you from embarrassment."_

I stared horrified at it. He really liked playing with my mind. I held back my resentment so I would not text back something rude. I was in a predicament now and there was no way out of it. I hate myself as I text-bed back where I was, but that's all I wrote. I wasn't going to apologize or explain myself for why I did it. I looked around and regretted being at the mall. I was upset and when I was displeased, I tended to spend whatever was in my wallet. I knew I was doomed.

A good hour had passed and I already had six shopping bags with me. I didn't buy one evening gown, but two and now was trying to decide which one to wear to the wedding. I even had my nails done because I simply felt like it. Finally, I found myself in the mobile phone store. I wanted to get a new phone, but there were so many things to choose from. I wasn't one to really care for specifications either, so I was really clueless. Just about then, my cell phone beeped again.

 _"Where are you? Niou XD"_

I scowled and text-ed him my location as the sales representative showed me the different models and selection. He was babbling about the different features non-stop when I felt an arm around me. "What are we looking at?"

I moved his arm away and glared at him. "You should be ashamed of yourself," I muttered as I picked up the latest Samsung Note. It looked sleek and professional to me and the man explained to me that it was more of a business tool. "I don't recommend this one; it won't last with your temper," Niou added as I gave it back to the sales representative.

"Niou!" I hissed, not liking that comment one bit.

"Try this one,"' he said, ignoring my displeasure as he pulled out another Samsung model from the display. He placed it in my hand and I studied it. It was nice and different. Actually it was beautiful. I didn't think I'd ever seen a phone this sleek; it was almost as thin as my credit card. "Well?"

I looked at him. "I hate you, but I actually like this."

"It comes in black, silver, and rose gold," he explained as he read the brochure. I ignored him and spoke to the salesman asking some basics and how much it would cost me. I finally made up my mind and decided to get the black one. I was at the counter to pay for my purchase when I saw Niou pull out his wallet to pay for it. "Don't you dare…" I warned, grabbing his wrist.

He moved my hand away and ignored me.

"Niou…" I said his name angrily as I pinched his arm, and he yelped a bit and narrowed his eyes. "If you don't let me pay for this, I'm going to kiss you right here," he threatened seriously.

I grabbed his shirt and gave him a light peck on the cheek. I was not going to let him pay for it. I did not want to feel like I owed him something. I was not going to let him pay for it. He laughed and moved away. "Not that kind of kiss," he winked as he paid for it.

Niou picked up the bag, grabbed my hand, and dragged me out of the store. I was horrified. "Here," Niou said, as he handed me the shopping bag. I looked at him and shook my head. "It is insulting if you return my gift."

Insulting? He's been crude to me and I have been openly rude to him. Why is it offensive now? "Why did you buy it for me?"

He shrugged. "Why not spend a bit on a lady I like?" he asked as he took my hand and placed the shopping bag in it. "Now, let's go and have lunch," he commanded as he took my hand again and dragged me to the parking. "Where's your car?" he asked me.

"Where's yours?"

He lit a cigarette and exhaled. "Marui dropped me."

I looked confused because the name did not sound familiar. "Do I know him?" I asked, curiously. He shook his head as he placed a hand in his pocket. I let out a sigh. Why do I always get myself into these situations? I thought as I walked towards my car. All this time, not once did he offer to carry my shopping bags.

"Do you mind if I drive?" he asked. "There's someplace I want to take you."

Drive? Drive my baby? Allow him to drive my precious car that I never let even Keigo to drive? "Errr…" I began, but he grabbed my waist and kissed me. My bags dropped out of my hands. I was fighting him when he suddenly let go of me and grinned. "Thanks," he said as he dangled my keys in front of me.

"Give it back to me!" I yelled as I tried to take it out of his grasp. "I never let my ex-husband touch my car either," I referred to my Range Rover Sports.

He leaned forward and kissed me again. "I am not your ex-husband," he answered seriously as he got into the car.

"And stop kissing me!" I said annoyed as I forced myself to sit in the passenger seat.

He ignored my tantrums as he adjusted the mirrors and reclined the seat to get comfortable. He was taller than me so he had to move it back a bit. Niou checked everything and seemed pleased with his seat. He started my car and started driving.

As he drove, I snatched the cigarette out of his mouth and put it out. "There will be no smoking in my car, thank you."

"You really don't like me," he stated flatly, not looking at me.

I was fuming. I wanted to spend a nice and quiet afternoon with Fuji, not go off somewhere with Niou. I was going to say something really rude when my cell phone rang. "Hello."

"Want to have lunch?"

I groaned inwardly as I heard Fuji's voice. The fates were in a teasing mood again. "Fuji, I would have love to have lunch with you, but I'm sort of stuck at the moment," I said, seeing Niou smirking. "Do you want to have dinner instead?"

"I'm having dinner with Saeki and Tachibana," he told me. "Would you like to join us?"

"Are these the two guys I met on the beach?" I asked. He replied yes and I agreed. We chatted for a few more minutes and I finally hung up.

"I didn't know my lady was a busy woman," Niou remarked casually.

I looked at him sharply. "First of all, I am not your lady," I said harshly. "And second, what I do with my time is my business."

It was his turn to say something, but my cell phone interrupted us again. "Will you throw that thing away?" he said, annoyed at being cut off.

I ignored him and answered my phone. "Hello."

"Fay, Atobe here."

I stiffened. Why was Keigo calling me? For a second, I panicked. Did something happen to Rai? I was thinking of all of bad things that could've happened when he spoke first. "Are you free for dinner? We need to talk about something."

Dinner? With him? Did I have the nerve or the temper to have dinner with him? "I made…" I began, remembering Fuji's invitation, but then stopped as I changed my mind. "You sound serious," I remarked softly. "I'm free. When do you want to meet?"

"I have a meeting in the evening and I'm not sure how early I'll be done," he answered. "Be ready around seven and I'll pick you up once I'm done."

I agreed and hung up. After that, I fell silent as my mind began torturing me. What did he want? What was so serious? Is it about Rai? Why couldn't he just tell me on the phone?

"Everything okay?"

I looked at Niou and let out a sigh. "It's fine," I said without really caring. I picked up my cell phone again and dialed Fuji's number. When he picked up the phone, I apologized and said that I couldn't make it after all.

"Niou, can we just go home?"

"We're already here," he announced as he parked the car. When I got down, I realized it was the same restaurant that Fuji brought me to for dinner. As we ate, he made light conversation or light teasing I'd like to call it. I gazed up from my plate and it hit me that this was a Niou I hadn't seen before. We'd never really been out in a formal restaurant before. This Niou was serious, but I felt vulnerable as he watched me. Those eyes were studying me dangerously and I wondered what was going through his mind.

After lunch, nothing was really said. I offered to send him home, but he refused and said that he'd manage. I even argued with him, but he was more stubborn than I was. As I left him, he hugged me from behind and kissed my cheek. "If that arrogant bastard hurts you tonight, you can always come to me. I'll listen to you if you need an ear."

After he said those words, he left. I was even more confused now.

* * *

It was seven thirty and I was nervous. I kept tapping my foot as I waited for Keigo. I had dressed up. Blame my ex-husband for it, but I knew when he said dinner, he meant somewhere fancy. I picked up my evening purse and left my apartment. I might as well kill some time with Yuushi.

When I walked into the apartment, I was surprised to see Rai opening the door. "Hey, sweetie," I greeted as I smiled at him.

Rai looked at me and his eyes widened. "You look very pretty, Fay-chan."

"Thank you," I said sincerely as I walked in and looked around. I found Yuushi on the floor with Sai sitting on his stomach.

"You promised, daddy," she whined softly.

"Promised what?" I asked curiously making them both look at me.

Sai jumped off her father and ran towards me. "I saw a Bratz doll and he won't buy it for me," she complained as she tugged at the hem of my dress. "Fay-chan!"

"Fay already bought two dolls for you the other day," Oshitari said frustrated as he sat up. "Fay, you're spoiling her," he accused me gently.

I chuckled lightly as I moved Sai's hair behind her ear. "Daddy's right," I agreed. "You got two last week."

She pouted and ran to the TV room. Rai let out a sigh and followed her. "She is getting spoiled," I remarked as I helped Yuushi stand up.

"You look nice," he complimented me. "Date?"

I frowned. "I'm not sure if having dinner with your ex-husband is classified as a date," I said sarcastically as I walked to the sofa and sat down.

He looked surprised. "You're having dinner with Atobe?"

I nodded quietly and was going to say something when my cell phone rang. It was Keigo. I picked up and he said that he was downstairs. "I'm going," I told Yuushi. "Good night."

"Fay," he said stopping me. "Whatever he says, don't let him get to you."

I didn't say anything. I walked out of his apartment and made my way to Keigo's car as I came out of the elevator. For tonight I had chosen an open back matte jersey dress. It was dark red and I simply love how it flowed over my knees. An ankle strap sandal adorned my feet as I got into his car.

"Hey," he greeted softly as he moved the hand break. "I'm sorry I'm late."

Keigo? Apologizing to me? I was stunned. However, I wasn't in the mood to goad him, so I played dumb. "It's alright," I said. "You said you didn't know when you were going to finish."

He drove in silence. I was starting to feel a bit nervous. I had always tried to avoid being in the same room alone with him, but now we were having dinner together and it was starting to freak me out.

He drove into the valet parking of a hotel and I immediately knew it was serious. This hotel had a restaurant on the top floor with a city view, and we had frequented this place a lot - I felt uncomfortable at the memory. I hesitated as he placed his hand on my back and led me inside. It was not that this place was not a good one, but it held a lot of beautiful memories for me and I did not want them tainted. It's true that I am divorced now, but I did not want to create a bad memory of where Keigo had proposed to me. I did not want to fight _here_ with him.

I stopped. "Ke…Atobe, why did you bring me here?" I asked looking at him as we stood at the doorway. "I don't want to fight with you here."

"We're not going to fight," he assured as we walked to the elevator. He hit the last button and we were taken to the famous Chinese Restaurant. The minute we walked in, I bumped into. "Fuji!"

He blinked as he heard his name. "Fay," he said with a smile as he greeted me. "I didn't know that you dumped me for your ex-husband," he stated as nodded at Atobe.

I looked at him annoyed. "I told you I was having dinner with Keigo."

Fuji laughed and conversed a bit with us. We waited for a minute and the waiter came and showed us to our table. Fuji had already left to their table with Tachibana and Saeki.

The waiter seated me and poured a drink for me. I looked up and saw my ex-husband talking to the waiter. The waiter finally left and he turned to look at me. I also noticed that Fuji and co were sitting rather closely to our table. He conversed lightly with me a bit, but I went straight to the point. "Why did you bring me here?"

He looked at me and smiled slightly. "Always to the point, I see," he remarked. "Well, if you must know. It's about Rai."

My heart started beating faster. I wanted him to continue, but the stupid waiter had chosen that time to interrupt and ask us for our orders. "Still like the same thing, Fay?" he asked me casually.

"Yes," I answered not even caring about the food.

Finally the waiter left. He looked at me again, "Rai's in the stage where he is constantly asking about his mother," he explained. "I am willing to revoke the court order…"

My breath caught in my chest.

"But…" he began. "Fay, I want to raise Rai in the best way possible. Therefore, if I am to have you interfering in his life; I want to make sure the people that you are with do not get in the way of his upbringing."

I narrowed my eyes. "Explain your statement," I said flatly.

"Niou Masaharu. Fuji Syuusuke. All those people are not…"

"You really are a jerk, Keigo!" I exclaimed. "I really thought you were going to have a civil conversation with me. We are divorced! It shouldn't matter to you who my friends are. You know me well enough to make sure that my son will be well brought up," I said, heatedly.

"You're the one who's being difficult…" he began, but again I cut him off.

"You bring me here to the place where you proposed to me, you cut my son out of my life, and now you're judging my friends?" I asked as I felt tears in my eyes. I promised myself that I would never show him my tears, but he was pushing it. Without even thinking, I stood up. I threw the napkin that was on my lap on the table and walked out in a rush trying to cover my face. I almost smashed the elevator button wanting the damn thing to open fast.

"Fay," Atobe said as he reached me. He grasped my upper arm, but I pushed him away. "Stop making a scene," he hissed as the elevator door opened and he pushed me inside.

I ignored him. What did he want from me? Am I making a big fuss over this? He wants me to stop befriending the people I know for my son? I was trembling from anger as I waited for the elevator to descend. As soon as it opened, I wanted to dash out, but he caught my wrist. "Don't…" he murmured as he pulled me out and led me to the hotel entrance.

The minute he led me into his car, I lost it. I knew I was going to regret this forever as I started crying. He had finally broken me. It was bad enough that I was having issues with him concerning my son, but now it seemed like Rai was going to be taken away from me again.

"Fay."

"Shut up," I said through my tears as I tried rubbing them away. "I extremely dislike you."

He stopped the car somewhere quiet. Before I could even react, he pulled me onto his lap. How he managed to do that in his car, I was clueless. "How dare you," I snapped as I tried to hit him. He dodged my attacks and held both of my wrists. "Stop it."

I tried struggling out of his grasp. "I hate you! I really you do!" I screamed. "All you do is hurt me! All you do is torture me! You're not the same man I married! You're a bastard! You're…" I kept shouting and then suddenly went quiet as I hugged him. I was crying silently in his shirt as I sat on his lap. All the emotions that I had blocked in me and the farce smile that I had played on my lips were shattered now.

I felt his arms around me as he held me closely. I knew he could feel my hot tears against his chest. I finally moved away from him. "I'm walking home," I told him quietly as I got off his lap and opened the door on his side.

"Fay…"

"I am walking home!" I repeated flatly. "Goodbye."

 _Somehow that word seemed so final._

* * *

I walked home with the feeling of emptiness. My heart ached. My head hurt. My legs were killing me. Somehow I knew that the evening was not going to end happily when I agreed to have dinner with him. As I walked quietly, I felt a car stop by. I ignored it and didn't bother looking at the driver. However, it was when the car stopped and the driver stood in front of me that I stopped walking as well. "Fuji."

"Get in the car," he told me quietly as he placed his jacket on my shoulders. I didn't even say anything as I walked with him to the car. I saw Saeki and Tachibana in as well, but they were respectable enough not to comment. Fuji asked Tachibana to drive while he sat next to me. "Home?' he asked me.

I looked at him and suddenly realized that I did not want to go home. If I went home then Yuushi will be there. Also, Rai…immediately thinking of my son pained me.

 _If that arrogant bastard hurts you tonight, you can always come to me. I'll listen to you if you need an ear._

I shook my thought as I remembered Niou's words. I didn't want to give him that. I was going to ask Fuji if I could stay with him, but I overheard him telling Saeki that Tezuka was waiting for him at his apartment. I let out a sigh. "I'm fine," I lied. "You can drop me at this address. I'm staying with a friend," I said giving him a false address.

They dropped me and Fuji walked out with me. "I didn't know you were having problems," he admitted. "Do you want to talk one day?"

I hugged him impulsively. "Thank you, Fuji," I said sincerely. "I appreciate your friendship."

He nodded and bid me well. At first, he was hesitant but he finally left.

I pulled out my cell phone and hesitated. Did I want to do this? Did I want to call him? He's been nothing but pushy and annoying to me. Why do I want to call him? I looked for his number and called, but after the first ring I immediately hung up.

I let out a sigh and sat on a bench. Although it was pretty late at night, the street was crowded. There was a homeless man ranting about something loudly. Some coupled enjoying a night stroll and people walking. I was almost lost in thought when my cell phone rang. I looked at my new phone in my hand and knew it was Niou. I picked it up, "Hello."

"Nice surprise!" he greeted. "I was in the shower. I'm sorry I missed your call."

I hesitated. I needed an excuse. "I kind of lost my bracelet," I lied. "I was wondering if it's with you by any chance or if you have seen it?"

"Nope," he answered.

"Oh alright," I said. "I…I need to go Niou. I'm sorry to bother you at this hour."

He agreed and bid me a good night. I leaned on the bench and played with my phone strap. I was there for a good half an hour thinking horrible thoughts. I was a fool. I was a stupid woman. I actually believed my dinner would result in something good today, but I knew deep down inside I knew as well that I'll end up hurting. I am never going to look at Kei…no. It is Atobe from now on. I am never going to look his way again. I'll never…

"Niou?!" I exclaimed as my thoughts were interrupted. I found him standing in front of me. "What… what are you doing here?"

"You're a lousy liar, Mishima," he stated as he took a seat next to me. "You think I don't know that homeless guy's rants by now? I could hear him in your background," he explained as he crossed his arms behind his head. "Which made me think, why would Mishima Fay call me about a piece of jewelery late at night while she's on the streets?"

I didn't say anything. What was I supposed to tell him? I thought of you while I was upset? I wanted to spend the night somewhere where no one can give me the third degree about my ex-husband? I hugged myself and closed my eyes. "I'm sorry," I apologized.

"Also, Mishima Fay would never apologize to me unless she's upset," he added.

I held a fistful of my dress in anger and bit my lip. Actually, I was more upset than angry at the moment. "I'm really sorry," I repeated sensitively. "I don't like you, Niou," I admitted. "I don't why I called you when I was distressed. I don't know why I did that?" I sighed as I covered my face with both of my hands.

I felt him rub the back of my head gently. He didn't make any move to hold me, but just moved his hand through my hair and pushed it aside. "Let me drop you home," he offered as he stood up.

I shook my head. "I'm not going home tonight."

He raised an eyebrow. "Oh?"

I stood up. "If I go home, I'm going to be bothered all the time by people who will ask me what happened," I explained. "I just don't want to go home tonight."

"And what makes you think I won't ask?"

I leveled my eyes with his. "I know if I said don't, then you'll stop. I don't know you that long, but that much I know about you," I said as I looked at the cell phone that he gave me and switched it off. I was serious about not being disturbed tonight.

He took my hand and started walking. "So where are you going to go?"

I hesitated. "Honestly, I don't know," I answered truthfully. "I think I'll check into a hotel."

He stopped and turned to look at me. "You can stay with me if you want," he invited.

"I…"

"But Mishima," he interrupted as he raised my chin so I was on the same level as he was. "I am no gentleman." He watched me. "If you stay at me place, you won't be sleeping alone."


	7. Chapter 7

**[Author's Note: Hello everyone. Thanks for your reviews. I had written this story a long time ago. I do need to give credit to the kiss scene later in the chapter. It was written by a friend (Houseki)]**

* * *

"Get out," Oshitari Yuushi said firmly as he pointed his finger at the door. Atobe narrowed his eyes at his best friend. He had come straight to Oshitari after his disasterous night with Fay. He only came to pick up Rai. "Thanks to you she has switched off her phone and I don't know where she is now," he said angrily. Oshitari Yuushi was someone who would not anger easily, but this was the last straw.

"I didn't plan it that way," Atobe sighed as he sat down and ignored his best friend's outrage.

Oshitari studied him and realized that the powerful Atobe Keigo looked defeated. He was weary and he actually looked like he had aged a couple of years more. He rubbed his temple trying to relax. "Atobe, I thought you wanted to tell her that you want to try again?"

Atobe clutched his fist. "I was going to!" he confirmed. "I just lost it when I saw Fuji and the others. What the hell is my ex-wife doing hanging out with those undignified people?!"

Ohitari crossed his arms disapprovingly. "You really are an ass," he told Atobe. "Have you not learned your lesson? She is popular and well liked. She actually tells you to your face what she thinks," he explained. "That was the hardest thing for her to do when she went to any of your stupid social affairs."

Atobe looked up sharply. "What do you mean?"

Oshitari eyed him carefully. "Atobe, you were so absorbed in your own world that you never noticed how much Fay hated your business gatherings or social ones," he added. "Why do you think she was always quiet? It wasn't because she was bored. It was because she didn't want to say or do anything that would make Atobe Keige look bad."

Atobe let out sigh.

"I'm not saying that Fay doesn't have faults of her own. She wasn't exactly patient with you when you worked 24/7."

Atobe stood up. "Yuushi," he said. "Keep Rai with you tonight, I need to clear my head."

Oshitari was a bit surprised. "Atobe, there was a woman you were serious about before. What happened to her?"

"Che…" he swore softly. "She was a stupid and shallow woman. She hated Rai and kept making sure that he would never be there when she was," he answered. "I keep comparing them, Yuushi! It's as if that stupid ex-wife of mine put a curse on me!" he admitted. "I keep comparing them."

Oshitari stared in amazement at Atobe as he left. He couldn't believe that Atobe had actually confessed that he still thinks of Fay. He knew the only reason he had tortured her like that post divorce because it was Fay that had filed for it first. He was there when he saw the grim expression on Atobe's face as he read the divorce papers that were sent by her lawyer.

He slumped on the sofa and shook his hair off his face. _Why the hell am I always in between?_ He thought. _I wish Kaede's weekend would come sooner so we can have some peace when we go there,_ he thought as he closed his eyes.

* * *

I was not afraid, but terrified. I was sitting in Niou's living room and wondered for the tenth time what I was doing there. When he said that he wasn't going to let me sleep alone, I almost fled, but then realized he was teasing me.

I let out a yawn as I stretched on the sofa in the living room. The room was dimly lit and Niou had gone to his room to get me a change of clothes. He had offered me to sleep in his room, but I told him bluntly that I am gluing myself to the sofa. I didn't want to go anywhere near his bed. I almost fell asleep when I felt something fall on my head. I sat up and realized it was an oversized T-shirt. "Is this even yours?" I asked as I held it up in front of me and thought that two Niou's could fit into it.

"Yes," he answered, not looking at me. "I'll bet you're hungry. I'll order us some pizza."

I picked up the T-shirt and stood up. "Oh no, you don't need to do…' I said embarrassed, but he stopped me. "I haven't had dinner either, so I feel like pizza," he explained as he picked up the phone. "What type do you eat?"

"I'm not picky," I replied. "Whatever suits you." I saw him nod and talk on the phone as I went to the bathroom to change. I took off my clothes and let out a sigh. I was a mess. I was not only confused, but I was in a stranger's apartment. I still classified Niou as a stranger. It hasn't even been a month since I've met him.

I washed my face and brushed my hair with my fingers. Finally I put the T-shirt on. I frowned as it hung loosely on me. It really felt like I had nothing on as one side slid down my shoulder. I wanted to kill him for giving me such a thing to wear. I was glad that it fell below my knees though. I was not in the mood to expose my legs. I walked out of the bathroom and found Niou nowhere in sight. I frowned as I carefully sat on the sofa.

I have to admit that I was very surprised when I first stepped into his apartment. It was lavish and neat. I never really thought of him as this type of person. Niou finally came out, wearing shorts and a T-shirt. "Want to watch a movie till the food comes?" he asked as he opened a cabinet. I realized it was a DVD library. "What genre do you like?"

I forgot his question the minute my eyes fell on the stack of anime he had. "Oh!" I exclaimed as I looked at his collection. "You're into anime?!"

"Who isn't?"

My ex-husband I thought. I suddenly shuddered as Atobe's face popped into my head. Anyway, I browsed through his impressive collection and finally settled on one show.

Surprisingly, I was enjoying myself. I had thought that I'd end up feeling uncomfortable all night, but Niou was on his best behavior. It was too good to be true. We watched and he kept making remarks about the show that made me laugh. The food came and I realized we liked the same type of pizza. I'd asked him to choose because I didn't like to impose anymore on someone whose place I was staying at. I helped him clear the empty plates and clean up the place, then we resumed watching TV. However, this time I noticed that Niou placed himself on the same sofa I was sitting on. I didn't really object because he kept a fair distance between us. As Niou watched quietly, I was determining things in my head.

It was ironic that I was planning new resolutions as I sat there. I decided that I was going to distance myself from Yuushi. I knew Sai needed me, but I would make sure that I didn't stay close to him. I decided that I would not go to Kaede's weekend, for I knew Atobe was going to be there. I realized I had very few real friends apart from those connected to Atobe Keigo. I didn't care that he said he didn't want me associating with him. Maybe its time I actually accepted that Rai will not be part of my life anymore. As I made those new resolutions, I promised that I would stick to them and with those thoughts I drifted off to sleep.

* * *

Atobe Keigo sat in his car. He had always been too proud to admit something he didn't like, but even he had to admit that tonight was officially a catastrophe. When he saw Fay break down and cry, he felt his conscience scolding him to no end. He knew Fay was strong and she had put up a lot with his crap, but he had never expected of her to actually cry in front of him.

Atobe Keigo also knew that Mishima Fay was no longer his. When he had first met Mishima Fay, she definitely had been one of those rare ladies that kept his attention. She laughed with him. Joked with him. And teased him to no end.

He had asked her out and she had accepted.

One date had turned into many. Days with her turned into nights. Finally, he had proposed after seeing her for six months. A lot of people told him that he was rushing it, but he knew when his mind and heart were set on something, he would do it.

The first year of marriage had been bliss. She was everything he looked for in a woman. The day she told him that she was pregnant, he was so pleased that he took her to Paris to shop for baby clothes.

However, the year Rai was born was also the year that Atobe Daitaro had passed away and the Atobe Empire was handed to him. He already knew the business and how to run it, but with his father gone, it was a 24/7 job and Fay had not been patient with him.

He was always at meetings, on business trips, and rarely at home to see little Rai. When he came back home, he was too tired and only wanted to relax, not giving Fay much time to spend with him.

Also, in his quiet time he had wanted to only think of his own father and how it saddened him that he was gone. Although his father never spent enough time with him, he had promised himself that he would always give Rai his time, but began to see that it was an impossible task. It was him taking over the business that made him realize how much his father tried to settle some time for him, but he never could because of work responsibilities.

He remembered it was that last fight that caused Fay to send the divorce papers. When they had finally gotten some time alone and he wanted to spend it with her, she had talked about babies. By then Rai was almost a year old and she hinted that she didn't mind another sibling for Rai. He had bluntly told her no, he couldn't handle another child. He was rarely there for Rai and he wouldn't even have time for another.

It seemed that after they had that conversation, all they did was argue and fight. Four weeks after that, Fay had finally sent him the divorce papers. He hated the fact that Oshitari was there when he received them. The first thing he did when he got them was left everything at the office and went straight home.

She was there packing and they had done nothing but quarrel until the maids had actually stepped in and broke their heated argument. Fay was so angry that she just left without saying anything. He had been so furious that he immediately called his own lawyer and asked him to review the papers and remove all custody of Rai from her side, for she was not getting him.

And the rest was history…

 _What have you done, Keigo?_ He thought regretfully as he finally drove home.

* * *

I watched Niou as he slept soundly. It was 5 AM in the morning when I opened my eyes and I had found myself sleeping on the sofa with him beside me. The sofa wasn't that big either, but he was just laying there closely to me. I felt a rush of weirdness as I continued watching him. Why was I calm? I should be panicking by now.

He was sleeping on his side. One arm lay on his body, while the other acted as a pillow for his head. He looked too innocent as he slept, almost like an angel with his silver hair spread out like that. I sat up shivering from the cold and yawned. The room was dark and it was chilly. I saw a blanket on the other sofa and reached for it. I was about to turn around and resume sleeping where I was when I heard the answering machine go one.

"Masharu!" I heard a voice and immediately recognized it as Aya's. "You were supposed to meet us earlier today. You didn't come. I hope that everything's alright," she said in a worried tone.

I looked at Niou. Did he break his plans to come to me? I thought as an unsettling feeling hit me. I saw him open his eyes and look at me. "That wasn't meant for your ears," he muttered, yawning. "Damnit, I have work," he complained as he sat up as well and scratched his hair.

"Work?" I asked surprised. He actually works?

He knocked my head lightly. "Silly woman," he said softly. "I just have to finish a program. I am a freelance after all. I work at nights on my laptop."

"You look tired," I admitted, still surprised that he works.

He smirked. "I'm only tired because it took me a lot of self control to not kiss you." He winked as he moved his feet to the floor.

His remark made me look down. I don't get it. I remember one conversation I had with Yagyuu while Niou was in the pool at his house the other day that he was rather shy. If this is him being shy then I don't know what to expect of him when he's not.

Niou picked up the bottle of water from the table and drank it. He leaned back on the sofa and closed his eyes.

I felt my heart start beating faster at what I was going to say. "Niou."

"Hmmm…"

I moved a bit. "You can kiss me," I said quietly. I don't know what possessed me to say it. Was it because he wanted me and was not denying it? Or was it because I wanted to feel free out of my ex-husband's clutches and this was the only way I would feel liberated. He had kissed me before, but they were unexpected kisses and it was me fighting him most of the time. Now, I was telling him it was alright. "Niou…"

"I heard you," he remarked. "You come to me."

What? Was he that tired? I thought as I watched him. "Why can't you…" I began, but he grabbed my wrist and pulled me onto his lap. He held the back of my head gently and lowered my head since I was sitting on him. Since I allowed the kiss this time, it was different. I moved closer and cupped his face gently as he kissed my lips lightly.

My senses erupted at the feel of his soft lips ghosting against my own. His fingers found their way through the back of my hair and caressed the strands, while his tongue came out to tease my lips. My lips parted willingly, his tongue slipping in seeking my own out. Our tongues clashed, his taste sending my heart racing. Our mouths worked furiously, desperately. Perhaps, for Niou, it was a desperate kiss. The one he knew would decide it all. That made this kiss that much more exciting.

Needing air, but not wanting to escape his mouth, I pulled back and latched on to his bottom lip, pulling it with me. I sucked on it gingerly, enjoying the sounds of his excitement in his breathing. I briefly opened my eyes that I hadn't realized I closed, to look up into steel blue eyes. I couldn't help but shiver at the stare. His eyes expressed so much that it was making it hard to look away. Releasing the lip, I breathed in the air I needed before enveloping myself back into the heat of Niou's mouth. My eyes closed once our lips meshed together again.

This time, Niou didn't hold back, and he attacked my mouth with a lust, a want, perhaps even love? My arms wrapped around his neck of their own accord at some point, and his fell to rest on my lower back, kneading my covered flesh gently.

Our tongues began to dance with each other; they slid beautifully against one another. My body was tingling with desire, starting at my lips all the way to my toes. My body was on fire, and I could feel the heat radiating off of Niou's own body.

I captured Niou's tongue with my teeth, and sucked on the appendage with much enthusiasm as Niou gave heated moans. I released his tongue and escaped the lips that tried to recapture my own and instead trailed gentle kisses down Niou's face and neck.

I couldn't help but breathe in his scent. I felt like I was breathing in his entire being. My body felt like it was floating from his scents. Sweat, a certain cologne, and something that was just Niou. It was sending me over the edge. If we didn't stop soon, I wouldn't be able to control my body anymore. But, his smell. It made me want to lick, and taste, and savor. I nipped gently between his neck and shoulder, and he hissed appreciatively. Wanting to see if his ears were just as sensitive as the rest of his flesh, I decided to tackle that spot next.

He didn't disappoint me. The moment my tongue trailed up the outer edge of his ear, his breath hitched and he let out a shaky breath. I closed my mouth over his lobe and sucked on it sweetly and nibbled on it gently, and once or twice I'd bite down on it with my canine.

Now, wanting to know exactly what he would do with my last bite, I couldn't wait any longer. My lips trailed back down to his lower neck and licked, kissed, and sunk my teeth into his skin. Niou, once again, didn't disappoint me. His breath hitched and wrapped his arms around me.

"Son of a..." he exclaimed in surprise at the sudden pleasure. Niou's hands couldn't stay still now. They traveled all across my back. The sensations went through my body like wildfire and I sighed out my pleasure and released my hold on him.

Finally released from my grasp, Niou placed a hand on the back of my head and joined our lips together. This kiss was much more hot. Tongues slid across each other with no destination, but to ecstasy. My hands caressed his strong arms and down his chest, I wanted to see him. No, I needed to see him. His body. I reached down to the hem of his shirt and pulled on it, breaking from his lips long enough to pull the shirt over his head. He found my lips immediately once the shirt hit the floor. My hands roamed over his chest, feeling goose bumps rise. Niou's hands slid under my t-shirt and drew pictures of nothing on my back, making me arch back into his soft touch. He directed much of his attention to the small of my back, the most sensitive area. I couldn't hold back what I was feeling anymore.

"Niou…" I whispered softly with urgency in my voice.

He made to move and held onto me in a protective vise as he turned to lay me on the sofa, using one hand to support himself above me. His free hand roamed the contours of my side, his lips descending onto my neck, letting me feel the pleasure he had just experienced.

I wanted to feel everything that Niou had to offer, but this was all happening way too fast. I wanted him, but not like this. My mind was having trouble keeping up with the pros and cons of what we were so close to doing. My nerves were so sensitive to his ministrations that it was hard to think clearly. His lips were so soft, yet urgent. He started to lap at his intended mark, and latched onto me without warning.

Why is he doing this to me? Why don't I want him to stop? Why do I want him to stop?

He let go of my neck and started to make his way down, across my collar bone, and he moved the fabric of my shirt away as much as it would give, licking and nibbling on all the exposed areas. His hand started pulling on my shirt when my hand came down to stop him.

He looked down at me; his blue eyes searched my face, trying to see what he may have done wrong.

I sat up and made him sit up with me. I was shaking and tried to stop the shivers by hugging myself. "We're moving too fast." I barely managed to say as I pulled my T-shirt up trying to cover my shoulder. My whole body was on high alert and I could feel it screaming for Niou.

* * *

Niou moved and leaned back on the sofa. He pushed his hair back and tried to relax his breathing. He had not expected to react that way with her. As he calmed his nerves down, he felt a throbbing pain from his neck and he realized it was from her bites. Who would've thought that Mishima Fay who had been nothing but snappy and rude to him from day one would actually be this wild if pushed?

He didn't say anything.

I didn't say anything.

I think we were both a bit overwhelmed after what had almost happened. Niou finally stood up picking up his T-shirt from the floor. "I'm going to take a shower," he told me. "You can use the other bathroom as well if you want. They're extra clothes on my bed."

I watched him walk away. When I tried standing up, my knees almost gave in and I fell back onto the sofa. What is this? Why am I still shaking? Why can't my heart stop beating so fast? I tried soothing my nerves and I finally stood up. I went to the other bathroom and immediately took off my T-shirt after taking the extra clothes and went into the shower. Niou's scent. I wanted to scrub it off me. I stopped him, but why wasn't I feeling guilty?

I stayed in the shower for a good half-hour before coming out. I dried myself and put on the extra clothes that belonged to Niou. I dried my hair and walked out. I noticed that it was already bright and the sun had made her way in already.

I made my way into the kitchen and decided to prepare some coffee since it was early in the morning. Even before his arms came around my waist, I felt him there behind me. His scent was now buried within my senses and I was aware of his presence. "Good morning," I murmured leaning back into his arms.

He kissed my cheek lightly and moved me aside. "Do you want to get some breakfast?"

I shook my head. "No," I answered quietly. "I'm going to go home now."

He turned me around and rested his forehead on my mine. I realized that he's done that many times and it seemed to calm him down. "Go and get some rest," he ordered. "You won't get it here."

I moved away and nodded. I didn't get it. Yesterday I was fighting with my ex-husband and decided that it was finally over. Today, I was with Niou and I was comfortable. Am I allowed to be this at ease this fast? I thought to myself. "I won't be sleeping," I admitted. "I need to clean out my apartment and I've decided to start looking for a job."

"I thought you didn't need to work."

"Oh, I don't, I… Wait a minute. How do you know that?" I demanded, surprised that he had that piece of information.

He grinned. "Data."

I ignored that remark. I needed to think. I needed to do it without him around. I turned and decided to forget about the coffee. I picked up my things and put my shoes on. "I'm going to leave," I announced.

"I'll drop you off."

"No," I declined. "It will be…it will be complicated if you drop me off," I admitted. I knew if anyone saw him dropping me off then they would immediately assume that I had spent the night with him. Well, it wasn't technically a lie, but I didn't want them to think that.

I walked to the door. "Bye."

"Mishima," he said stopping me. I didn't look at him as he called me. "You can't ignore it," he said as a matter of fact. "I'll let you think for a while and clear your head. so I'll see you at the wedding."

I nodded and left.

I was thankful that I didn't run into anyone I knew when I walked into my apartment. The minute I entered my own home, I let out a sigh as my comfort surrounded me. I immediately took Niou's clothes off and went into the shower again. I still felt like I could sense him. It annoyed me a bit because I was trying not to let it affect me.

However, I was no fool.

I knew it meant something. The fact that my heart accelerates every time I think about it, proves it. I finished showering and put on a pair of shorts and a tank top. I sprayed perfume all over me and was satisfied that Niou's scent was almost gone now. Almost.

I hummed as I cleaned up my apartment. I actually emptied my closet as well and put aside a lot of clothes that I didn't want anymore or were outdated. Also, I checked out listings and openings for jobs. I circled a few and jotted down their application address. I was serious about working. I figured if I worked then my mind wouldn't be occupied by things that would stress me all the time.

It was also at this time that I decided to finally switch on my cell phone. It had been off since last night.

I found several messages. I browsed them. One was from Yuushi and he was worried. Second one was from Fuji and he was asking about me. The third one was also from Fuji and he wanted to spend the day with me. I looked at my clock and saw that it was 11 AM. I decided to call him from my house phone.

"Hey," I greeted as he picked up. "I just got your message."

"You sound much better than last night," he remarked.

I could hear something in the background. "Am I disturbing you, Fuji?" I asked as I heard lots of shouting, wind, and something else.

"No,' he answered. "I'm at a photo shoot actually."

I smiled. "I forgot that you were famous," I admitted as I lay on my stomach on the floor. "So do you still want to spend the day with me?" I asked, casually playing with the telephone cord.

"Yep, but do you mind if Tachibana and Saeki join us today as well?" he asked. "They're in fact staying with me for a while because their house is being repainted.

"I don't mind," I said, pleased. I actually wanted to meet his friends. I wanted to create a new lifestyle for myself. I wanted to stay away from anything that reminded me of Atobe.

"I'll be a bit late though. I might be done around 3 PM. Where would you want to meet?"

I thought for a second and then got an idea. "Fuji, why don't you guys come over for lunch?" I said. "I'll have enough time to whip up some delicious things if you will be late."

He laughed. "Delicious? It sounds tempting. I will take that offer,'" he said. "It's been a long time since we had a decent home-cooked food," he admitted sheepishly. "Once I'm done, I'll pick the others up and we'll come over."

"Great!" I exclaimed as he said goodbye. I went to my kitchen and checked what we had. I saw that I had enough things to make a proper lasagna and soup. I still needed some things though. I picked up my wallet and keys and decided to go to the convenience store opposite our building.

As I stepped out, I saw Yuushi just wanting to knock on my door. A part of me was so happy to see him and I was going to ask him to accompany me, but I remembered my promise last night. "Hi."

He observed me carefully. "How are you?"

"I'm good," I replied instantly. "I'm sorry, but I need to go and get some stuff. I have friends coming over for lunch," I said as I closed my apartment door and stepped out into the hallway. I sidestepped him, but he caught my arm. "Seriously, are you alright? You weren't here last night."

I moved his hand. "I'm always okay," I said as I walked to the elevator.

I felt him walk behind me as we walked into the elevator. "Are you brushing me off?" he demanded as the elevator doors closed. I looked at him. The question staggered me, but I wasn't going to concede. "I'm just busy," I answered. "I have friends coming over and I've been cleaning my apartment."

His eyes clouded for a second. "Rai was here last night. He was asking about you."

I felt a thump but I let it go. "That's nice," I said quietly. "It doesn't really matter any more. Take care of him for me," I said as I walked out of the elevator and went to do my shopping. I didn't even give him a chance to say anything else.

I had also realized as I shopped for ingredients that no matter how hard I fight for my son, I would never win. Atobe was not going to let go. I also knew that even if there was a 1% of me winning him back then I would be doing Rai wrong, for I would never be able to give him the lifestyle his father had given him. Don't get me wrong, I live comfortably, but his father lived to show off.

Could I do it? Could I pretend that Rai didn't exist? Was I ready to sacrifice seeing my son and just let go? I shivered at these thoughts and realized that no, I couldn't do it. I would take every opportunity to see him. But how could I do it without involving Atobe? How?

I let out a sigh and decided to get some stuff for a salad as well. I was in one of my cooking moods. I picked up some drinks as well, fresh bread, and other things that I might need. I also got some nachos and dip, if they were going to stay longer and might watch a movie.

It was 2 PM when I finished cooking and I realized I had probably overdone it. I changed my mind about that lasagna and instead had made rice, sweet and sour chicken, vegetables with garlic sauce, soup, and salad. They were all different cuisines and I hoped they actually liked it.

I stank by now from all the cooking and decided to shower. I realized that this was my third shower of the day. I quickly showered; blow-dried my hair, and changed into a miniskirt and a shirt. Just as I was done, the doorbell rang. I rushed to open it. "Hey," I said with a smile as I opened it. "You guys are…." I began, but stopped.

It wasn't Fuji.

It was someone completely unexpected.


	8. Chapter 8

Atobe Mizuko walked into my apartment and wrinkled her nose. I always found it ironic for her name to be Mizuko. The name indicated a pure character, but this woman was anything but pure. She was vicious and blunt. And she had always made it clear that she was never fond of her only son's wife.

I watched the older woman and wondered why she was waltzing into my apartment like she owned it. "Can I help you?" I asked. I was always respectful of my elders especially if they were my in-laws. However, this woman was an exception. She had made my life a living nightmare since I moved into their mansion.

I never really mentioned her before because I had always wanted to forget that she existed. Also, when I was at home I made sure that I was in my wing of the house and never went to her side unless it was necessary. She might be partially to blame for Rai not being sent to me, but I knew it was also stubbornness on Atobe's part as well. Both of them had this fixed idea that an Atobe had to be raised by an Atobe.

Even though I mentioned once that Atobe's father had said that a child born in his mother's care turns out weak. He was clearly wrong when he married this witch.

She looked around. "It seems that you have guests arriving soon," she said in a firm tone. "I will be straight with you," she stated. "I did not approve of your marriage to Keigo to begin with and _now_ he seems to have taken it into his head to try thisnwith you again for Rai's sake." She sounded exasperated.

I gritted my teeth and clenched my fist. Who the hell did she think she was? I did not even care what that stupid ex-husband of mine wants from me. I had deleted him from my life and thoughts last night. It did surprise me that he wanted to try again, but I did not want to do anything with him. "And your point is…?"

"I want you to say no," she replied curtly.

I bit my lip so I would not say anything that I would regret later. I simply walked to my door and opened it. "Please," I said softly controlling my tone so it would not show anger.

She narrowed her eyes at me. "Are you throwing me out?"

"I said please," I repeated quietly. "I do not plan on involving myself in your son's life anymore," I told her. "And you have no right to come here and tell me what I can do or cannot do. I have already made this decision on my own. I ask you to please leave so this would not be any more awkward than it already is."

She left haughtily without saying another word. The minute she left I leaned against my door. The new piece of information made me feel pathetic because I found myself actually considering it. He wanted to try again? If we tried again that means Rai would be with me 24/7. I shook my head. No! I won't live with him again! I hate him! All he did is hurt me! My mind was going to hunt me more, but it stopped when I saw three gentlemen watching me.

"Was that Atobe's mother?" Saeki asked curiously, pointing at the end of the hallway. "She did not look happy."

I smiled. "Hey," I said as Fuji hugged me tightly.

"Hello," he smiled back as he held me. "Are we late?"

"Nope," I said excitedly. "You guys are just in time." I led them into my living room.

I had guests so I made myself forget the conversation I had earlier with Atobe's mother. My day was good. The three of them stayed all day. I found them to be easy to talk to. I especially liked Tachibana Kippei when I found out he was a counselor for troubled kids. It surprised me because at first glance he seemed so wild and serious.

Saeki was cool as well. He modeled from time to time and was a freelance photographer on the side. I smiled when he told me that and admitted that he did have the looks for it.

When we ate, they cleared everything off and I was grateful. Fuji did joke and told Saeki to stop pigging out because he has a shoot tomorrow, but Saeki refused and said that it wasn't everyday that he got to eat like this.

Once we had eaten, they helped me clear the plates and wash them. I told them there was no need to, but they insisted. I really enjoyed their company because they were really comfortable to be around with.

It was around 7 PM and we were all lying on the sofa. "I can't breathe," Saeki mumbled. "First you serve a heavy lunch and then nachos and dip?! You're going to kill me."

We laughed and then I remembered something. "I want to apologize for last night, guys," I said. "I didn't mean to make a scene like that."

Tachibana watched me. "I don't really think you were to blame," he assured me. "It was your ex-husband, no?"

I grimaced and looked away. As I did that I saw Fuji watching me so I removed the scowl from my face and smiled instead. "I just didn't like what he had to say," I admitted truthfully.

Thankfully, they changed the subject. "So, Fay, will you be accompanying me to Aya's wedding?" Fuji asked.

I actually blushed. Uh-oh, I thought. Was I ready to tell him that I already had a date and it was someone he wasn't fond of? I saw three pairs of eyes looking curiously at me. "I…I already have a date," I whispered.

"Say what? We didn't hear you," Saeki teased.

I glared at him. "I said I already have a date!"

I felt an arm around me. "Do tell me who's taking my precious Fay away from me?" Fuji asked, intrigued.

I hesitated and let out a nervous laugh. "Let's discuss this later…" I tried changing the subject as I moved his arm off me. "It's not really important," I said and it was very evident that I was feeling uncomfortable.

"Hmm…interesting…" Fuji mused. "This only means I don't like the person you're going with." He rubbed his jaw. "Is it Niou?"

I winced.

Saeki almost choked on his drink as he heard the name. "Niou Masaharu?" Saeki gasped. "You…him…together?"

I blushed at his thoughts. "No," I answered. "We're not like that. I…He…He just asked me and I said yes," I said, not wanting to go into details. I still wasn't sure where I stood with Niou myself so I didn't want to publicize anything yet. "He, umm, just asked,"

Fuji looked like he was going to question me more, but fortunately Tachibana changed the subject. I nodded gratefully at him and he winked. Another few hours were spent on chatting before they left. I even spoke of looking for a job and Saeki offered to help me. He asked me to meet him for lunch in a couple of days because he needed some time to sort things out.

It was rather late after I cleaned up, so I decided to get some sleep. I checked my phone and saw two messages. One was from Yuushi.

 _Fay, I don't know what's happening with you, but I hope you're well. Call me when you're feeling better. Oshitari._

I felt bad. I didn't mean to do that to Yuushi, but I had to be strong now. I deleted the message and looked at the second one.

 _Good night. Niou XD_

I read it and let out a sigh. It was all starting to come back to me again.

* * *

I had spent the last couple of days job-hunting. I also tried avoiding Yuushi and made sure I did not come in contact with Atobe or anyone I knew from that circle. Kaede called me several times, but I didn't answer any of the calls except for one. She asked me about the weekend, but I told her that I wouldn't be able to come. I apologized sincerely. She did press me, but I told her firmly that I couldn't.

I held my portfolio as I looked around for Saeki. He had asked me to meet him at a restaurant. When I finally found him, I was surprised to find him wearing a suit. He really stood out. "Hey, Fay," he said as I joined him.

"I hope I'm not late," I said as I sat down.

He looked at his watch. "Nope, you're ten minutes early."

I chuckled as I looked at the menu. We spent some time talking and he finally asked to see my CV. I handed it to him and he read it. "You don't really have much experience," he remarked as he looked at it. "Impressive university you graduated from, though."

"Thanks," I replied. "I did several internships and worked as a marketing assistant after I graduated," I explained. "It's not much really, I know. A year after that, I got married and had to move here. So with all the moving and stuff, I didn't really look for another job. I did use my savings in many investments, so I'm comfortable."

He nodded. "What kind of job are you looking for?"

"I'm flexible because I'm a fast learner. I'd of course be happy if it was in my field."

"What about the modeling industry?"

I looked at him. "Er…as?"

"It's an interesting industry. Would you like to work in it?"

I raised an eyebrow. "Again I ask, as what?"

Saeki smiled. "The manager's assistant," he said simply. "It's for an agency and no one really knows who he is yet. You seem to have the attitude for it and I think you'll make a good one."

I pursed my lips. "Its sounds all right, but you're telling me this as if I'm already hired. I have to go through an interview with him as well. Oh, what's his name?" I asked curiously.

"His name is Saeki Kojirou."

Finally, the weekend had arrived. Saeki had hired me on the spot. I did tell him that I didn't want him doing it as a favor, but he admitted that he had been interviewing people all day and he liked my attitude. So we discussed the terms of my job and I accepted. He told me I could start in two weeks. When I woke up I found a message from Niou.

 _I'll pick you up in three hours. Niou XD_

I put my cell phone aside and showered. After that I picked up my stuff and decided to go to a hair salon and get my hair and nails done. I was in the mood to dress up. I was out for more than an hour and finally arrived home. I had just laid out my dress and accessories out when I head the door bell ring. I opened it and immediately felt weak.

"Fay-chan!" Rai said hugging my leg. "Where have you been?" he asked as I bent down and hugged him.

"I'm sorry sweetie," I said quietly. "I've been really busy."

He nodded in understanding. "I am happy," he announced. "Daddy told me that he will introduce me to mama soon."

I froze. What? Is…this…is this true? I asked in shock. As I was going to question him more I saw Yuushi standing above us. "Come on, Rai, we'll be late to Kaede's."

He nodded and ran towards the elevator.

I stood up. "Yuushi," I started, but he cut me off. "We're running late. Let's talk later," he said. "I think you should know that Kaede's very upset with you for not coming," he added. "I don't know what's happened to you."

I frowned at his remark. "Yuushi," I said, stopping him. "I've made up my mind not to be involved in anything Atobe is. I've got my own friends. I'm going to start working soon."

He didn't say anything to that. "Fay, he wants to try again," he told me. "I just hope that you would give him a chance."

"So I'm supposed to wait till he feels like it? I'm not going to go through that again! And why now, Yuushi? Why the hell now after all that emotional turmoil I had to go through?" I asked angrily.

"He found out about your miscarriage."

I stopped. I looked down at the floor and just turned around and went into my apartment. I had hoped to never be reminded of my miscarriage. I remember when I had asked Atobe about giving Rai another sibling he had said no. we ended up arguing that night, but ironically it did result in my getting pregnant as well.

I was so stressed when I found out about my pregnancy and I was also scared of him. He had clearly stated that he didn't want another child and at that time I had been pregnant. I was scared of what he would do or make me do. I was also so stressed that I had stopped eating and was constantly worrying and fainting. Finally, I think my body had lost hope in me and I ended up getting a miscarriage. It was after that that I filed for my divorce.

I shrugged as I went to my room to finish dressing. If he knew then he knew. It was two years ago. It was part of my past.

I changed with less enthusiasm than before. I decided to wear a Ruffled and ready to party, with sweetheart neckline and cascading mesh ruffles. Fit-and-flare shape. It was imported polyester/spandex bodice with nylon skirt

I was almost ready for Aya's wedding and was in the process of putting on my earrings when my doorbell rang. I walked to it and found Niou. I actually blinked for a second.

Niou?

He was in a proper suit and he looked…

He looked good.

He walked in and hugged me. "I like this dress," he said, taking in my scent. I watched him and smiled. "I'm surprised you're in a suit," I admitted moving away from him.

"Yukimura's orders," he told me. "I can't disobey Yukimura,"

I studied him carefully. Something… Something was a bit off. "Niou?"

"Yeah?"

I frowned. Why did I feel a bit weird? He watched me carefully and walked towards me. I just stayed still as he put one arm around my waist and lifted my chin. He kissed me. As I kissed him back, I felt withdrawn. There was something peculiar about this situation. Without thinking, I pushed him away. "You're not Niou," I said, wiping my mouth. Am I crazy? I thought as I blurted those words out.

Niou stood in front of me. I watched him as he smiled slightly. He took out a cell phone from his pocket and dialed a number. "Masaharu, do come in now. I believe she's passed the test."

I stared dumbfounded at the door as I saw another Niou walk in. I narrowed my eyes at the imposter. "Who are you?" I demanded.

"Sweetie, don't be angry," said the Niou who had just walked in. "This is Yagyuu, and I was just testing a theory."

"Aren't you two old to be playing switching games?!" I snapped, irritated. What were those two thinking?

"I apologize, Mishima-sama," Yagyuu said, bowing lightly.

"And do you mind changing back to yourself? It's freaking me out seeing two Nious. It's bad enough I have to put up with one."

Yagyuu actually smiled and walked to the bathroom after asking where it was. I crossed my arms as Niou walked towards me. "Sorry," he whispered. I looked away. "Don't be like this," he whispered pressing his lips onto my neck. "I just wanted to see if you knew me well enough," he explained.

I pushed him gently away. "Stop it," I said moving away. "I still need to finish getting dressed."

He muttered something under his breath and took something out of his pocket. I realized it was a lollipop as he removed the wrapping and put it in his mouth. "Yuck! Too sweet!"

"What are you doing?"

"I need to keep my mouth busy, I quit smoking, you know. You said you didn't like it."

I stopped. He… He quit smoking? Did he actually listen to me? I was surprised. I didn't say anything, but walked to my bedroom and he followed me in. "Did I invite you in?"

"I don't need an invitation," he answered, sitting on my bed.

"Make yourself useful then. Yagyuu's outside. Make him some tea while I get ready," I ordered, applying touches to my makeup. He totally ignored my request and came up to sit behind me. "Hello…" he said mischievously as he wrapped his arms around me.

I pushed him slightly away. "Niou, no!" I snapped. "Just don't…" I began confused, moving my hair away. Niou was Niou… He seemed to have more of a physical effect on me than anything else. With the news of my ex-husband and son, I just didn't want to move too fast into anything. I was relieved as well that nothing happened between Niou and me the other day.

I stood up. "Let's go," I said, picking up my evening purse. We both walked out and found Yagyuu waiting. "I'm sorry," I apologized. "I didn't offer you anything to drink."

"It's alright, Mishima-sama," he replied. "We need to get going."

"Yes, we're driving with Hiroshi," Niou told me. "My car is being serviced."

I nodded and followed.

I actually whistled as I witnessed the setting before me. It was beautiful. The colors, the flowers, the arrangements were simply breathtaking. It was crowded as well. We were there for a while and when I saw Aya I almost cried. She was gorgeous.

She wore a beautiful white dress. It was a tube gown that flowed all the way to the ground. Long white gloves adorned her arms till her elbows and her hands held a beautiful bouquet of beige roses. Her hair was pulled back and held securely with a small crown and a veil tied to the back of her hair. Gold jewelry gave the last touches with a necklace she wore and a pair of shiny earrings.

Yukimura was handsome as well. I could say beautiful, but I didn't want to call a man beautiful. He wore a suit that fitted him well. His hair had an extra sheen to it today and he looked too good to be true.

"Stop drooling over Yukimura."

I elbowed Niou in his side as he said that and he swore softly. A swift glance from Sanada told him to not continue that or else. I was amazed that there were people that Niou actually listened to.

After the ceremony, the bride and groom again waltzed to their own music in their own world. In between dances, I found myself somehow dancing with Sanada Genichirou one time. "How has Masaharu been treating you?"

I blinked at his question. The question didn't faze me; it was the fact that this man actually said something. I had judged him to be a man who did not have much to say, so why was he suddenly asking about Niou? However I did not ignore his question. I looked at him. "Well, Niou is Niou," I answered quietly. "We're just friends."

His next question hit right on the spot. "Does he know that?"

I halted and looked at him. Before I could answer him, I felt another person take me away. I looked up in to see who I was dancing with. "Oh," I said as I noticed that it was Yukimura. "Congratulations."

"I apologize if Sanada is giving you the third degree about Masaharu," he said.

I gave him a smile. "You shouldn't be worrying about me, This is your big day. Let me handle Niou on my own."

"Mishim…"

"I am only someone to distract him from his boredom," I said. I stopped for a second. Where did that statement come from? I asked myself. I saw Yukimura watching me and felt like he could read my confusion. I excused myself and walked away to the rest room.

I looked into the mirror and frowned. Is that what my subconscious has been hiding from me? I thought. Was Niou someone to me because I'm hurt and lonely? And was I just a way of ending some boredom in his life?

Damnit! Why are you torturing me like this?! I shouted at my mind. I held onto my head. If I knew Niou means nothing to me than why did I almost lose control like that with him the other day? Why did I do something stupid like that? Even when I remembered how I had acted, my cheeks reddened.

 _It's not you_ , my mind told me. _Your body betrays you every time he kisses you. When he holds you, you feel alive. When he kisses you, you feel loved. When he's there, he's pushing the loneliness away._

"But, I…"

 _No. It's not love. You do not love him because I am still thinking of someone else,_ my mind admitted. _You don't even like, Niou. As much as he is using you to be with someone, so are you._

"Who…who am I still thinking of?"

 _You already know._

I went out again and saw Fuji. I ignored the empty void within my heart and spent some time with him. Niou joined us too and he and Fuji got along for my sake. Finally I bid the married couple goodbye and left with Niou. Aya looked so happy that I envied her. I recalled my own wedding and it actually made me teary-eyed.

"You look upset," Niou remarked as he drove. I felt him watching me and brushed a tear away.

"Weddings always upset me," I said, putting out my tongue at him

He actually smiled. "Want to get a drink?" he asked. "The night is still young."

"Sure," I nodded, not minding some more company.

He drove to a hotel. "Nice place," I whispered as we entered the grand lobby. "This hotel opened a couple of months back, right?" I asked as he put an arm around me.

"What are you doing?" I asked him suspiciously.

"I'm holding MY lady, is that a problem?"

I looked at him through narrowed eyes, which indicated that his statement did not amuse me. Of course, being Niou, he ignored my reaction and just kept on walking. I was going to move his arm off my shoulder when we reached the elevator. To my utmost shock, Atobe walked out of it with his mother.

"Did we really have to come here, Keigo?" Mizuko said snobbishly. "I'd prefer a seven star hotel than this place," she announced, waving a hand in front of her. She stopped when her eyes settled on me. "Well, hello, my dear," she said sweetly. A little bit too sweetly for my ears.

I stiffened and I was sure that Niou felt it because he tightened his own arm around me and pulled me even closer. I noted that when Niou did that, Atobe did not look the least pleased. "And who is this _gentleman?"_ Mizuko asked and I immediately sensed the hostility when I heard it.

Niou let go of me and took her hand gently just as he had Sai's. "I am Niou Masaharu, Madame," he said politely. "I have heard nothing but greatness about the beautiful Atobe Mizuko."

I cringed. I even saw Atobe cringe. Was he for real? Why is he putting on a stupid charming act now? I wanted to snatch his hand back and remove it from hers. However, when I looked up… Atobe Mizuko was… Atobe Mizuko was _smiling_ and… blushing. She was actually _blushing_.

I looked at Atobe and he looked at me. It was one of those rare silent understandings we had. In the same moment, he pulled his mother away while I pulled Niou.

"What a charming young man," Mizuko said, smiling at Niou. I have never seen this woman ever smile genuinely and I felt rather thankful I hadn't. It was scary. "You must come to one of my galas," she said. "I'm sure you'll enjoy it very much."

"I would be honored," he said smoothly. "Would the lady like to join us for a drink?"

Over my dead body, I thought, horrified. Even Atobe looked like he would rather die than have a drink with us. He wasn't exactly on my favorites list and I didn't think Niou was on his at the moment either.

"Mother, we have an arrange…" Atobe began.

"Oh, we'd love to!" Mizuko exclaimed, holding Niou's hand with hers. "I'd like to learn more about you, Niou-san."

I stared, dumbfounded. I grabbed Atobe's sleeve. 'Do something, you idiot!" I hissed in his ear. "We are not doing this."

"I am delighted. I can't imagine a beauty as yourself already a grandmother. It truly stuns me to say that you are rather young and beautiful still." Niou continued charming her he tucked her arm under his and led her to the elevator.

"Che… You fell for that crap too!" Atobe said to me, watching in pure hatred as his mother flirted outrageously with Niou.

"Shut up! Get her away from him! She is making a f…"

"Don't!" he interrupted. "Don't finish that sentence." He gave me a sharp look. Suddenly looking as though he had just thought of something, he grabbed my hand. "Come," he said, and pulled me in the opposite direction.

Niou was getting impatient. He knew it was a mistake. Even at first glance of Fay's disapproving look he knew he should back off and stop the teasing, but he wanted to see Fay's reaction. It had been a good fifteen minutes already as they sat at their table and Atobe was still gone with Fay.

Every time he had tried to get up and look for Fay, the older woman had practically clutched to him and told him _another_ one of her stories.

 _Damnit where are they?_

 _What is he doing?_

 _Damnit!_

 _Damnit!_

"What do you think you're doing?"

He had pinned me to a wall. It was an empty hallway on one of the top floors of the hotel. I glared and pushed him, but he caught my wrist. "I'm sorry," he whispered into my ears.

I stopped struggling when I heard that.

He moved his hand to my stomach. "I'm so sorry," he repeated using his other hand to cup the side of my face. "Why didn't you tell me you were pregnant?" he demanded, his tone suddenly harsh.

I avoided his gaze. "What would you have me do?" I questioned, moving away from him. "You told me you didn't want more children. I panicked. I didn't know what to do." I sat down on the floor. "You were always away and I was alone."

I turned to him and then looked away again. I knew the business had been suddenly handed to him, but I had been at a time that I needed my husband. His mother had also been intolerable when he wasn't there and I didn't want to cause conflict so I always kept silent.

"I hate you," I cried quietly. "I really hate you." I tried to rub my tears away. "You hurt me. You literally killed me when you took Rai away from me. And now you keep coming to me and Rai is always in front of me. I don't want to be part of your life anymore."

"Fay…"

"I don't," I repeated sternly, standing up. "I will never forgive and forget you for what you did to me."

"I'll learn how to cook," he said quietly. I was stunned. "I'll cut my working hours short. I'll be always there for you and Rai! Damnit, I'll even move into your apartment to keep my mother away from you," he said, arms coming round to hold me. "I want a sister or brother for Rai…"

Atobe looked sincere. I looked down while he held me and struggled to hold onto my sanity. I thought we were done with all this. I had kicked him out of my life, my mind, and my soul. Why was he coming back to me like this?

 _You want this…_

 _You said you would do anything for Rai…_

 _Take it…_

No, I thought stubbornly, moving away from him. I want Rai, but not like this. He was asking me for another chance, but this was Atobe Keigo who had done nothing but hurt me lately.

 _He is still the Atobe Keigo that you loved and married…_

"NO!" I shouted, shaking my head roughly. I knew he must've thought I was shouting at him. "Go away," I said holding onto my head.

"Fay…"

I pushed him and ran.I didn't care where I was going. I just ran.


	9. Chapter 9

It's been three weeks since Aya's wedding.

Three weeks since my mind telling me the truth about Niou.

Three weeks since my confrontation with Atobe.

Niou had contacted me that night and demanded what happened when I left him there with Atobe Misuko. I knew he was furious because he had been left there with her for more than two hours.

I apologized to him and asked him if he could give me some time to settle my life. I needed time to think. I needed to do something. I was glad once I started working for Saeki. I've been two weeks at the job and already exhausted.

Niou called once or twice, but it seemed like he had completely backed off. I'm not sure what was going on, but I was thankful for some peace of mind. I saw Rai a couple of times and took him out once with Sai when Yuushi came over and begged me to watch them because an emergency had come up.

I was slowly getting into a new life pace and getting busy, but it all shattered when I walked into my apartment from work and saw both Oshitari and Kaede there.

First, I was angry because they had gone into my apartment without my permission. Second, I was worried as to why they were there and finally, I was sad because I realized I missed Kaede so much when I saw her. "From the looks on your faces this tells me that you're not here on a social call."

Kaede looked at me. 'What has happened to you?" she demanded angrily. Kaede was not one to lose her cool so quickly, so I knew whatever was on her mind. She was not happy about it. "You think you can cut us out of your life just like that?"

"I did not cut…"

"Shut up!" she whispered. "You've hurt us all."

I looked stunned. Hurt? "I hurt you all?" I asked. "I was the one hurting," I said. "I had to put up with my son being paraded in front of me all day without him knowing about me. I had to put up with my ex-husband everyday. I'm the one who had to sacrifice a lot of things." I narrowed my eyes. "You have Sai!" I pointed at Yuushi. "You have Jirou," I told Kaede.

Kaede and Oshitari looked at me speechless.

I took off my business suit jacket and sat down at my kitchen table. I was feeling warm and heated and I just wanted to cool off.

"This is none of our business, Fay," Kaede said quietly. "But, we want you and Atobe to seek a marriage counselor."

Marriage counselor? If today was April Fools day I would've actually thought they were pulling my leg. "Must I remind you that we are divorced?"

"We don't care if you are divorced," Kaede answered simply. "You don't hate him and he doesn't hate you. So I think you should both give each other a chance for Rai. This situation has gone out of hands and poor Rai doesn't even want to be at home anymore. Atobe's away most of the time and Mizuko's very strict with him."

"He is burying himself in work because he's trying to avoid his issues. You know how proud he is?" Oshitari remarked. "Mizuko is being too strict with Rai. The woman scolds him for his table manners, walking etiquette, and what he reads. For god's sake Fay, he's only four years old."

"Fay, you've also gone out of control," Oshitari finally added. "You're working 24/7 and if not, you're spending a lot of time outside with strangers. We are your friends."

"We know he wants to try," Kaede said walking towards me. "What I don't understand is why you are being hard headed? You said you would do anything for Rai and this is one of those things."

"You just won't undersa…"

"Listen to us." Oshitari interrupted raising his hand. "We want you to do what we will tell you now."

I stood up and looked suspiciously at them. "What…are?" I asked in a whisper. " I had a feeling I was going to hate it.

* * *

 _Three Days Later_

"I did not agree to put up with this," I shouted furiously at Atobe who walked into my apartment. I can't believe they tricked me into consenting to this. He had four designer suitcases behind him as one of his servants helped him bring them in.

"You think I did?!" he shouted back at me. "I was officially blackmailed! No one blackmails Atobe Keigo," he said dramatically with the flip of his hair.

I could not believe this. When I heard of Yuushi and Kaede's suggestion at first I actually threw them out and told them to come back when they were sane again. They had told me to have a trial phase with Atobe and allow him to live with me for a week and see if we can work out our differences.

I had shouted no. I had screamed no. I had almost beat them with the word 'no'. They had both prepared themselves for the worse of my temper and had actually tricked me into agreeing. I shouted the word Satan and demon at them and that they were inhuman beings, but they said that Atobe would be there in three days and to prepare the apartment.

I clenched my fists. A gesture I had been using a lot lately to control my anger. It was also my way of preventing me to punch someone out and right now I was itching to give him a black eye. "Atobe, why do you have luggage for three months," I hissed. The tremors in my voice were obvious to him that I was controlling my fury so it won't come out.

"Che…I can't be wearing the same thing every day."

I rolled my eyes and ignored him. I looked at the servant. "Put the things in the guest room, please," I ordered calm now. I left Atobe alone and went to prepare dinner.

 _And so it begins…_

* * *

 _ **Day One**_

Atobe ate in silence as I sat down. All day he had been on the phone and laptop sorting out work. He was still a worAyalic. I frowned noticing that he looked really worn-out. Also, I was a bit amazed that he wasn't complaining about the food, for I knew that he was accustomed to gourmet meals everyday.

I was curious about one thing. "Atobe…how on earth did you agree to this?"

He scowled slightly as ate. "I'd rather not go into details."

'You said they blackmailed you," I recalled. "You said you wanted to try and yet they blackmailed you."

He glanced at me. "You should know me by now that if I wanted to do something I do it on my own accord. I won't resort to being blackmailed," he mumbled as he lay his fork down. He removed his napkin off his lap and picked up his plate, placing it in the kitchen.

"Wh…what are you doing?" I whispered. He…he was picking up his own plate.

"My blackmailing came with terms."

"What on earth did Yuushi blackmail you with?" I demanded following him into the kitchen. I could've sworn I saw him wince at the question, but he ignored it. "It's not important.' He waved his hand.

"And you agreed to do this just like that?" I asked disbelievingly. I didn't think that he was the type of man to just concur.

"He also threatened me." Atobe leaned against the wall as I washed the dishes. "He said if I didn't then he would handcuff me to you. Knowing Yuushi I know he would do it,' he added. "The bastard actually did it once to me when we were in middle school."

I didn't say anything. I finally cleaned up everything and went to my room to check on my cell phone. I was surprised that I still did not hear from Niou. It was surprising because he had been after me all this time and suddenly no news from him. I was actually worried about him. I decided to call him, but his phone was switched off. That really did worry me.

I sat down on my bed when my own cell phone rang, startling me. I did not recognize the number. "Hello?"

"Mishima-sama."

The voice was new and yet somehow familiar. "Um…'

"Yanagi Renji on the phone," he explained.

"Oh."

I heard him fumbling on the phone and I could hear a lot of chaos in his background. "Renji-san," I began quietly. "I am glad you're fine. I was worried about Niou."

"Masaharu's fine, Mishima. Physically anyway," he answered. "Aya and the others spoke to me about something and I wanted to personally tell you regarding Masaharu. Would you like to meet me somewhere quiet?"

I agreed and hung up. I quickly dressed and picked up my things. I walked out and realized Atobe was there. I let out a sigh, "I need to go somewhere," I said walking to the door. "I'll see you later." Not giving him a chance to say anything.

I arrived at the place where Renji asked me to meet him. It was actually an office when I walked in. "Hi," I said with a smile as he let me in. "Is this a private office?"

"Yes, I'm an investigator. A private one."

"No wonder you're data accessible," I muttered sitting down.

He didn't say anything. He sat in front of me and folded his arms. "Mishima, Masaharu's going through a tough time now," he told me. "He is not someone to show it, but a dear friend of his passed away two weeks ago."

I looked at him with sad features. "This friend…"

"This friend is someone he loved from middle school. She was the captain of the tennis team and got paralyzed when she was with him in a car accident. Masaharu was wild in those days and she somehow helped him to reattribute."

"Why are they not together?"

Renji offered me tea and continued his story. "Her parents moved because they wanted her to settle anew," he explained. "They kept in touch sometimes and she was going to visit him because she was getting better. Even after all these years, they were still fond of each other."

The question I wanted to ask was why he kept…

"You reminded Masaharu a lot of her, Mishima," he finally said answering my unasked question. "The first time I saw you with him, I immediately remembered her as well."

Somehow what he told me made me feel better. I was happy to know that Niou and I were just two people that needed each other. I was also happy that he had someone that he loved. I was also relieved. "Why are you telling me this now?' I asked forgetting what he had said earlier.

"She passed away, Mishima."

I looked at him and to my astonishment I felt tears slid down my cheeks. "I'm sorry," I said softly. "Oh, poor Niou!" I covered my face. To lose someone that you love…I remembered Yuushi for losing his wife.

"Genichirou took him to Hiroshi's estate and he's staying with him for a while. I think you know by now that his cell phone's switched off."

I nodded silently.

"It's best that…"

"I think it's best that I don't contact him for a while," I finished his sentence. If I reminded him too much of her then I would only be causing him pain. "Renji-san, Niou and I we're not like that. I think I only went out with him because he kept pushing me and him with me because…you know…"

"Yes," he agreed. "He is a good friend, Mishima. Please keep him as that in your mind."

I stood up. "Thank you for confiding in me," I said thankfully. I walked to the door and stopped my hand resting on the doorknob. "Did…Did I look like her?"

"75%"

I went back home. To lose someone that you love so dearly, I wonder how painful that is.

 _Didn't you lose someone as well? It is the same painfulness that they are feeling._

Considering what Renji had told me I actually wanted to speak with Niou. Should I drive to Yagyuu's estate and see how he was? I thought contemplating the matter.

I made up my mind and turned my car.

I wanted to see Niou.

I wanted to sort everything out, so there were no mixed feelings. With Atobe around, I really need to settle where I stood with him. I am not planning on going back to my ex-husband, but I want to make sure I don't lose Niou as a friend.

I finally arrived and walked onto the courtyard. As soon as I did that, Yagyuu appeared. "Renji told me that you were coming."

That devil! I thought to myself. He set me up, I thought infuriated, but I didn't let it show me. "Can I see Niou please?"

"He's by the pool side."

I nodded and walked towards it. I found it weird that the same day my ex-husband was living with me; I had to sort out some things with Niou. Entering the pool area, I saw Niou emerge from the pool. He immediately stopped and found me standing there. His eyes clouded for a second and I knew he was seeing her and not me. I walked towards him, "Niou."

Without saying anything he drew me into his arms and held me. I wanted to scold him for getting me wet and dripping all over me, but I remained silent. I was relieved because all this time he was thinking of someone else. "My condolences, Niou. I didn't know…"

He raised my chin and kissed my forehead. "It's alright. I'm sorry for not telling you," he apologized. "I like you Mishima, you helped me and I know you want me, but I can't give you the Niou love."

I poked him, "You're really full of yourself," I muttered hugging him again. "I like you as a friend, Masaharu."

"Likewise, babe! Likewise!"

I was happy. We stayed for some time talking and he actually looked better now. I apologized for leaving him with Mizuko the other night and he apologized for stalking me endlessly.

We made our peace with each other. I was not confused anymore about his feelings for me and was finally at ease. When I looked at my watch I sensed that it was late and the drive back will take long, so I excused myself and left. He walked me to my car and kissed my cheek lightly. "Goodbye," he whispered in my ear. "Drive safely."

"I should be telling you that." I winked as I drove away.

"Did she buy it?"

Niou turned to see Yagyuu standing behind him. "Yeah," he answered quietly. "She is rather gullible."

Yagyuu walked back with him to the pool. "Why did you do it? You told me you were serious about this one."

Niou sat down and pulled a cigarette from the pack that was on the table. He figured it was alright to go back to smoking now. "Although Atobe Mizuko hates her, she still admitted that she was the best woman her son had. Plus, they have a kid Hiroshi. I don't want to be the cause of the kid's unhappiness if his parents decide to get together."

Yagyuu watched his friend in amazement. When he had gotten Niou's call and he told him about his plan. He had refused at first hand, but once he heard of his reasoning. He finally consented to it. He knew it will take a while for Niou to forget about her, but knowing Niou he was sure that he would pretend that he was alright.

* * *

When I went back home I found him watching TV. He was listening intently to the news and didn't even look at me when I walked in. However, I should've known that he was more aware of his surroundings. "Where were you?"

Where…where was I? I glared at him. "Excuse me, but you have no right to ask me where I was! You don't own me."

He stood up. "I'm not questioning you; I was just curious where you were all this time…"

"Atobe! Don't start this with me…"

He let out a sigh. "Fay…"

"Goodnight!" I interrupted rudely going into my bedroom. However, Atobe Keigo was Atobe Keigo and I found that he had followed him. "This is difficult for me too," he said bluntly. "You think I enjoy doing this?" he demanded.

"Look Atobe, we can ignore each other! The goal is that we do not kill each other by the end of the week."

He sat down on the bed. "They said that the longer we take to acknowledge each other the longer we'll have to put up with this."

I looked away. "I still don't get why you're doing this. You're a grown man! You can sue them," I said as I picked out my pajamas from the closet. "We don't hurt Rai when we argue, he doesn't…"

"He knows."

Pause.

I almost fainted if he didn't catch me. "He knows," Atobe said softly. "We told him this morning…" he added. "He said he got his birthday wish because he wished for Fay-chan to be his mother."

I felt tears. "Where is he?"

"Now is not a good…"

"Atobe, where is he?"

"He's with Yuushi."

I pushed him away and ran towards the door, but he grabbed my arm and stopped me. "No," he said firmly. "You're not seeing Rai until we get through this properly," he told me, but he stopped struggling with me as he saw me crying. "Fay…"

I cried so much. It was so true yet it hurt so much. He finally knew. After all these years, he finally knew. How was I going to speak to him? What was I going to tell him if he asked me why I never told him? "What am I going to tell him if he asks me?" I whispered afraid.

He didn't answer me.

I was sure he didn't know what to tell me.

* * *

 _ **Day Two**_

He drank his coffee silently. "Why are you working?"

I peeled an apple and ate it. "Because I'm bored," I replied instantly. "I really have nothing better to do," I added standing up and putting on my jacket. I moved my hair back and tied it.

"When Rai stays with you, are you still going to work?"

I picked up my laptop and eyed him carefully. "Please don't say things like that unless you mean it,' I said leaving the apartment and slamming the door in the process.

I was angry. Although I know he was trying and my son knew I was his mother, I still doubted his true intentions. No one can pull all those mean things and then suddenly want to make it better. I was afraid that if I indulge in this then I'd end up hurt again.

I went to work and found Saeki waiting. He wisely chose not to comment about my cold attitude that morning. I liked Saeki, for he was very professional. On my first day, I found myself in a meeting with him and Yuuta. I was happy to see Yuuta, he seemed to be doing well and he was content with his promotion.

I helped out Saeki the whole day. As my day ended and I was heading home, I found Fuji by the main door of the office. "Fuji~" I said hugging him. It felt so good to see him. I always welcomed his friendly smile.

"Would you like to do some shopping with me?" he asked. I was going to say yes, but stopped when I remembered a rather annoying being at my apartment. I cursed softly under my breath and apologized to him.

I went back home and scowled as I saw Yuushi in the elevator. I decided to ignore him, but he interrupted the silence. "Don't be like this."

"I'm annoyed," I said irritated. "You've gone too far butting into my life."

"I just don't want you to end up like me, Fay," he remarked leaving the elevator when the doors opened to his floor.

I felt bad. I forgot about Yui for a second. I let out a sigh and walked in. the minute I did, I could smell burning and the kitchen was in utter chaos. I also found two maids there cleaning. "What the hell happened in here?"

Atobe walked in only wearing pants. "I messed up."

I looked at him and then back at the maids. I calculated what could have happened and narrowed my eyes. "Please tell me you weren't trying to cook!?"

He didn't answer me sitting on the couch. I didn't know even know how to react to the news. I ignored the predicament at the moment and picked up a shirt. "I do not want to see you walking half-naked in my house," I said firmly. "My house. Therefore, you live under my rules!" I stated clearly. "Now put this on!" I ordered giving him the shirt.

He snatched it without a snide remark and put it on, but he didn't bother buttoning it up. "And since you managed to burn everything in the house," I added looking in the fridge to see nothing there. "I suggest you order something and feed us."

"Why don't we eat out till they finish cleaning?"

I stopped. Somehow, it all seemed fishy. "The last time we had dinner, it was a disaster if I may recall correctly."

"Just dress up," he muttered. "It's not like we're going to talk. We're going to eat. I've been in meetings all day and I don't want to go and eat at Yuushi's. I want something expensive."

"What makes you think I want to have dinner with you?"

He narrowed his eyes. "Fine, then I'll go alone."

"You do that!"

We kept arguing when one of the maids interrupted. "A…Atobe-sama," she whispered. We both looked at her clearly not amused at being interrupted. "Mishima-sama," she said bowing. "We will need to do some dusting and airing so you will have to leave the apartment."

I clenched my teeth. "Fine, then I'll go downstairs to Yuushi's."

"You can't," he objected. "Rai is there and we agreed that you will stay away till we sort things out," he explained. "Just get dressed, Fay. One dinner with me will not kill you," he commented going to the guest room to change.

I wasn't in the mood for him so I just wore black pants with a gold lace tuxedo shirt. He wasn't kidding when he said he wanted something expensive. He took us straight to the most expensive seafood restaurant in town. I ate in silence. I knew if we even talked, we would end up arguing. He did make small talk, but that was all to it. I did not want to do this.

I had one question though. How was he able to do this with his mother around? Although she wasn't able to control him, I knew he respected her well enough to think about the things she said. "Where's your mother?"

"She's doing her annual shopping in Paris," he answered automatically sipping his drink.

We finished dining and walked out of the restaurant. I suddenly remembered something out of the blue. "Atobe?"

"Yes?"

"Tell me about Yume, please. I want to know what type of person is taking care of my son," I admitted getting into his car.

"She was my nanny."

"Oh." That truly surprised me. I had always thought of her as a young nanny that had more time with my son than I. "Rai is with Yuushi because Yumi's gone to Paris with mother," he explained further glancing at me.

I didn't comment further. A part of me finally relaxed knowing that. It's not like I was fully at ease. I just figured that the person that brought him up is qualified to take care of my son as well.

We reached my apartment and walked in. the elevator ascended and stopped at some floors allowing people in and out. We were almost to ours when the elevator doors opened again. I was stifling a yawn from boredom because I wanted to get to my apartment. However, something woke me when I heard…

"Mama."


	10. Chapter 10

My heart stopped.

My breathing stopped.

My sanity stopped.

I felt like I would have collapsed if the person next to me had not held me in place. Mama. One word. I never imagined it to have such a powerful effect on me. I fell onto my knees slipping out of the person's grip and looked at Rai. "I'm sorry."

Rai walked in and held my hand. "Why…"

"Rai!" Atobe interrupted sternly. "We said we wouldn't ask her."

Rai looked at his father and his newfound mother. "Is daddy and mummy together?" he asked curiously.

"Do you even know what together means?" Atobe muttered wryly, watching me hug Rai. I picked him up.

"No, we were just having dinner," I answered quietly, placing a kiss on his cheek. "Do you want to stay with mummy tonight?" I asked.

"Fay…" Atobe scolded.

"Don't… Don't deprive me of this!" I was a bit surprised though when I shouted that sentence. My son was taking this too easily. I mean, I had thought a lot of drama would be involved, but he seemed to have accepted the fact that I was his mother already.

He was not smiling at that. Somehow, I had the feeling he was angry because Rai had disobeyed him and come to our floor. "I'm staying with you two in the same room. I don't want you filling his head with crazy things."

"The only thing crazy in this whole situation is you," I hissed at him in annoyance. I ignored him, still carrying Rai and walked to Yuushi's floor. I wanted Rai's belongings since he was staying with us tonight. Fortunately, Atobe was wise enough not to follow me and went to my apartment instead.

Yuushi greeted me, but I gave him the cold shoulder. It was because of him that I was in this situation. "How long are you going to keep this up?" he asked, handing me Rai's bag.

"When you decide not to butt into my personal affairs," I replied haughtily, leaving.

"Is mummy mad at Sai's daddy?" Rai asked me when we walked into my apartment.

"Rai," Atobe interrupted me before answering his question. "Didn't I tell you to address him as Oshitari-sama or Uncle Yuushi. It's all about respect."

Rai looked down.

I rolled my eyes. "You scold him too much."

"I want my son to grow up with the proper attitude."

"Just like his father?" I asked sarcastically, going into the bedroom. He followed me.

"What was that supposed to mean?" he demanded angrily. "If you're implying something then say it to my face."

"You already know it…"

We argued.

He was shouting.

I was shouting.

However, I suddenly stopped when I heard crying. Rai was crying out loud with his face covered on the bed. "Sweetie…" I began, trying to hold him, but he moved away.

"No…" he whispered, sniffling. "Daddy and mummy are mad at me."

I looked at Atobe and then back at Rai. "No, no, sweetie," I soothed, rubbing his back. "We're not mad."

Rai kept crying. "You're shouting," he said between tears.

I looked at Atobe again pleading that he would say something. "Your mother's angry with me because I broke something," Atobe lied, sitting on the bed next to where I was holding Rai.

Rai was still not convinced rubbing his tears away.

"Be a man, Rai," Atobe added. "Didn't we say no crying in front of women?"

I smacked Atobe on the head. "You really are an idiot!" I hissed, pushing him away. I felt Rai tear up again, but this time Atobe pulled him onto his lap. "Didn't I say no crying in public?" he said rubbing Rai's tears away with his shirt sleeves. "It will upset your mother."

Rai nodded, still sniffling.

I saw Atobe talk to him quietly and Rai finally calmed down. "Fay, give me his pajamas."

I watched in amazement. I didn't know that Atobe had this impact on our son. I always thought he was too busy for him. I stood up, picking up Rai's bag and pulled his pajamas.

We both dressed him and I took him to the bathroom so he could brush his teeth. When we came out, I saw Atobe asleep on the bed only in his pants. I wanted to yell and throw him out, but I didn't want to upset Rai again. He jumped onto the bed and hugged Atobe's arm. "Good night."

Atobe patted his head gently and smiled.

"Sweetie, get some sleep," I said quietly. "I will be next door…"

Rai sat up. "'Mummy won't stay with us?"

"No, you have…"

"Please…" he said with puppy eyes. I looked shocked. I wasn't even aware that he knew that trick. I was always a sucker for that trick. Sai had pulled it on me several times, but I'd never see him do it. "Fine," I muttered. "I just need to change."

"Yay!"

 _Yay indeed,_ I thought sarcastically.

* * *

 _ **~*~*~Day Three~*~*~**_

I woke up in the morning to only find myself on the bed. I turned to look at the time and gasped when I saw that it was eleven. "Damnit, work!" I shouted, falling off the bed. I rushed to get dressed when a note caught my attention.

 _We both tried waking you up, but you were dead asleep. I called work for you and told them you were sick._

 _Keigo._

I was dead asleep? I don't remember ever being a heavy sleeper. I cleared my head from the sudden rush of getting up and went to the bathroom. I don't know why while washing my face I thought of Niou. It was still…weird. I was used to his constant calling and messaging and suddenly it was gone.

My cheeks heated up again, recalling what had almost happened between us. How would the situation really be right now if we had… I shook my head. Stop thinking about it, I scolded my mind.

I walked out of my bedroom and found the place empty. "Where is everybody?" I asked, but it was not a surprise that there wasn't any answer. I let out a sigh and busied myself in the apartment. It was late so I did some cleaning and cooked something for dinner. I wasn't in the mood for lunch.

After I was done, I went to take a shower.

* * *

Atobe came back home and found no one there. He heard the shower running and went to the guest room to change. He walked back out, wearing casual clothes, and went to the kitchen. _So she's been busy,_ he thought, noticing the many dishes on the stove. He retraced his steps and went into the living room. He noticed a bookshelf. He moved his hand across the many books, looking for something to read when he saw something peculiar.

Atobe curiously looked at the black leather, pulling it out. Why was it tucked behind everything else? He pulled it out and flipped through the pages. To his surprise he found it to be an album only of Rai. He held it and went to the sofa placing it on his lap. He flipped through it page by page and was trying to decide the events in the album.

His eyes settled on one picture and he actually smiled. It was a picture of Rai when he was a baby. He was a fat baby with gorgeous gray eyes and mass of dark hair.

I walked out of my room, after I showered and dressed in something comfortable. I found Atobe in the living room reading something. I approached him and saw that it was Rai's album that he was looking at.

"This is him at two months," I said quietly, watching him from behind the couch. I extended my arm and touched the picture. "He was heavy for me to carry around," I muttered lovingly. I flipped some pages and showed him my favorite picture. "I love him here. He said his first word here…"

"What was his first word?"

"Da!"

"I don't see any pictures of him when he's walking." Atobe observed, but he stopped, realizing his mistake. He turned his head immediately.

I heard him turn, but ignored him. His remark hit right on the spot. I never saw my son when he started walking. I went to the kitchen and busied myself at the sink, trying to wash some of the utensils that I had been using earlier.

"Fay…"

I didn't turn around as I did the washing. "Please don't call me that."

"Fay."

I heard my name again and felt his hand grasping my shoulder. He squeezed it hard and turned me around. My hand was holding a wooden spoon and it was covered in suds, but I was too surprised to make any move. Atobe cupped my face and he started kissing me. He was kissing me hard.

"I'm sorry," he whispered against my lips.

I tried moving, but he pushed me back against the sink and held my waist tightly, hugging me close to him and used his other hand to support my head.

"Ato… Ah…." I murmured against his lips, dropping the wooden spoon.

He angled his lips several times over my own and trailed them passionately all over my face.

"Stop!"

"Let's forget everything for now. I want us to feel _us_ just for now."

I stopped and looked at him. He was watching me carefully, his hands cupping my face again. I was confused. It hurt so much, but it felt magnificent. My body loosened itself from the stiff posture I was holding and I closed my eyes. I moved my hand and placed my palms over his chest, I opened my eyes and looked up at him. He was watching. He was waiting.

"Don't do this to me," I said softly. However, my hands moved of their own accord and wrapped themselves around his neck, and I lowered his head gently.

Something exploded.

I'd felt this passion before, but to my horror, I had felt it with someone else. We were kissing like we had never kissed before. Lips were furiously working against each other, tongues engaging in a dance, and his hands felt very good as they moved sensually all over me.

Distantly, I felt the sink edge poking my back, but I didn't care. I was more aware of the hands that were firmly set against my lower back and moving up and down. I was crushed against him and it felt wonderful. How many times had we been like this? How many times had it felt as superb?

For a second, he moved his heated lips away and hastily unbuttoned his shirt. I could sense the heat radiating from him. It scared me. I actually moved away, but he slapped his hand hard across the sink behind me and caged me in again.

I looked up and saw a different set of eyes. He jerked his shirt off and pulled me even closer with the other arm. There was love, tenderness, and something else in those eyes. It was a look that I'd seen many times before.

"You know I never leave things unfinished, Mishima," he said, raising my chin.

I thought he was gong to kiss me again, but instead he started trying to unbutton my shirt. He tried, but in his haste didn't seem to be able to do so. The buttons were remarkably stubborn and refused to yield. "Did you wear this on purpose?" he demanded.

"No, why would I do…"

RIP

"Atobe…" I whispered as his lips descended on my own again. My shirt was half-torn, he was invading my mouth and he had his arms tightly around my waist. This time I realized that I was kissing him back. I pulled him tightly against me with his hair and kissed him angrily. I was furious with myself and also angry with him, but I didn't care. I wanted to feel this passion.

He lifted me up and threw me onto the nearest sofa. I sat up, but he leaned over me, stopping me. "Help me take this off," he ordered, tugging at my loose comfortable pants.

I looked at him and realized how utterly sexy he looked. "No," I said, looking away. My mind and body were screaming for him, but I was being stubborn. I knew I wanted this, but I was being stubborn.

With a quick tug, he pulled them off. My cheeks flared, but I still looked away. "Mishima Fay," he whispered, biting my ear lightly. "I've seen you." He kissed my neck. "I've seen _all_ of you." He kissed my eye. "You and I made our little Rai together." A kiss on my nose. "Why are you so shy?"

He didn't let me answer. He just bent down and kissed me, loosening his hold and then he was not just leaning over me anymore, but he was on top of me. Our bodies were crushed together as we kissed, legs entangled, and much more.

"We're finishing this, Fay," he said against my lips. I was too drowned in my emotions to even reply. However, somewhere faraway in the back of my mind, someone was telling me to stop. I knew I had to listen, but if it…

RING

We both stopped. I looked at him when he pulled his lips back. He looked at me. He had a devilish look to him. His eyes were narrow and hair tousled and falling over his eyes. We waited. Ten seconds. Twenty. "Ignore them," he muttered, leaning back down.

RING

With all the energy I had left, I rolled away from underneath him. I was angry at myself for responding to him like that. I realized that if that bell hadn't rung then, I would've… Damnit, why was I so weak when it came to men when they kissed me? My mind recalled when I was with Niou and now… With Atobe? What the hell was wrong with me?

The doorbell rang again. I picked up my clothes quickly, ignoring Atobe's swearing and rushed to my room to put on another shirt. I walked to the door and as I did, I passed by the hallway mirror. I realized that my hair was messy and my face was a deep red. There was no way on earth that I was going to be able to open the door looking like this. I swore softly and held onto my face with both hands. I turned and saw him behind me. "Go wash your face," he said quietly, now wearing his shirt again. "I'll handle whoever's at the door."

I wanted to hit him for making such a remark, but I just went to my bedroom. Before I could go into the bathroom, my cell phone rang. I didn't even look at the caller ID before picking it up.

"Yo…"

My heart started beating really fast. "Niou?" Why was I feeling nervous? I thought. It's not like Niou and I have something going on. "Hey…" I was waving at my face. Damnit, why is it still heated? I thought annoyed.

"Bad timing?"

I hesitated. "N-No…" I answered. "I have guests over."

"No problem. I'm just wondering if you wanted to do some shopping with me. I need to buy Aya something for her birthday and I'm not good when it comes to shopping for women. Yagyuu said he would do it, but he had to cancel. Then I asked Renji, but…"

Is he explaining himself to me? "Niou,' I interrupted. "You can still call me you know and go out with me if you need anything."

"I just hope you don't feel uncomfortable if we spend some time together."

 _But the question is: how comfortable will you be with me?_ I thought to myself. We chatted for a while and I was finally interrupted when Atobe walked in. I immediately felt embarrassed. I hung up after bidding Niou goodbye and stood. "Who was it?" I asked, not looking at him.

"It's Yuushi and the kids. They're still here," he answered, leaning by the door.

I didn't look at him.

"Fay…"

"What happened earlier will not change anything," I said firmly, standing up. "It was a mistake and you caught me at a bad time."

His eyes clouded. I felt he was angered by that, but he didn't look like it. "So am I to assume that every time you're feeling vulnerable, you'll end up kissing someone?" he asked crudely. "I don't think I would like to share…"

"Don't finish that sentence!" I snapped. "Do you really think of me as a wanton slut?!" I demanded, tightening my fist. "You caught me off guard, damnit! I've never kissed anyone since we divorced other then you and…" I immediately covered my mouth.

Atobe straightened himself up. "Do continue that sentence, my darling ex-wife. I'm curious to know who else has tasted those precious lips of yours." He crossed his arms, challenging me.

I moved my hand from my mouth to my forehead and fell onto my knees. "Why do you keep saying cruel things to me?" I whispered, placing both hands on the floor. "Do you hate me that much?"

"No, Fay. It's the complete opposite," he answered. "You still want me. You want me as much as I want you," he said, leaving the room.

I placed my fingers on my lips and felt the bruise. Do I really want him as much as he wants me? I let out a sigh. I do realize that he's making an effort and he's trying to adjust. I do realize that. I loved him at one point and I knew… I knew my heart was betraying me and it was allowing him in again.

I'm afraid to ask myself if I want this. Am I falling in love with him again? Is this why I can't stop thinking about him? Is this why I responded to him? I'm actually thinking about him.

I ignored Atobe for the rest of the evening. I'm sure even Yuushi noticed that something was wrong. I was also thankful that Rai was spending the night with a friend, so that meant that I wouldn't be seeing Atobe when I sleep.

I turned in the minute they left and decided not to think about anything. I was meeting Niou in the morning and I did not want to think of anything else.

* * *

 _ **~*~*~Day Four~*~*~**_

"You… You look tired, Mishima."

I looked up from my juice at Niou and gave him a weak smile. I hadn't slept at all last night. Atobe's stupid kiss kept repeating itself into my mind. I had woken up really early to shower and change, so I would not have to see him. I still prepared his breakfast for him before I left. It was also strange that I found him sleeping on the living room sofa. "I didn't sleep…"

"Ex-hubby keeping you busy?"

I froze. I looked at him again and this time, I felt… I felt hurt. Without thinking, I stood up abruptly, but he grabbed my wrist. "I was only kidding."

"Well, don't joke like that! It's not funny! I am not with him! I hate him…" I pulled my hand away from his grip.

He narrowed his eyes. "What about Rai, Mishima? Don't you think he deserves good parents?"

I looked down. "Don't say that. How can I be with someone who hurt me so much?" I asked him, sitting down again. "They all want me to try. I mean… He's living with me for Rai's sake, but…" I placed my elbows on the table and leaned my chin on my hands. "I don't want you to tell me that too, Niou. Not you…"

He stood up from his place, circled the table and sat next to me. "I didn't have happy parents, Mishima." He put his arm around me. "My father used to beat my mother up."

I didn't say anything. Why was Niou confusing me again? "I still get mixed feelings from you. If I hadn't known about your ex-girlfriend, I really would have thought that you and I had something going on," I admitted, looking up at him.

He just hugged me without saying a word. I guess it was stupid of me to mention his ex-girlfriend who had passed away. I looked at him and I felt him lean even closer. Wait a minute… Does he want to kiss me? He got closer, but then my cell phone interrupted us. Startled, I moved away from him and rummaged through my bag to pick it up. I finally found it. "Hello?"

"Where are you?"

Where am I? I gritted my teeth. He really was getting intolerable. "Atobe, you have…"

"Fay, it's an emergency," he interrupted. I felt like his voice was on edge. "Rai's in surgery, his appendix ruptured earlier."

I felt my breath hitch. Oh my… My baby was in pain. I asked him which hospital they were at and stood up. "I need to go," I told Niou frantically. I turned around to leave, but he grabbed my wrist for the second time that day. "Let me drop you off."

I so wanted him to, but I stopped him. If Niou dropped me off then it would cause conflict if Atobe saw us. Although I was not involved with him, Atobe would think otherwise and being in the state I was in at the moment, I did not want any clashes. "I don't think it would be a good idea."

"I thought you said you didn't care what your ex-husband says," he remarked, watching me. "Plus, it's not like we're sleeping with each other."

I looked up at him dryly. I realized that it might be a mistake to see him. Was it too soon? He was still vulnerable perhaps. I put my hand on his chest and he held it. "Niou… I have to go now," I said quietly. "Maybe… maybe we should not see each other for a while."

He leaned down and kissed my forehead. "Yes," he agreed, holding my hand. "I've kept you. Go to your son, Mishima."

I turned around and left. I had a feeling that I was not going to see him for a while. Did we make a mistake? I don't know… I couldn't think at the moment. I needed to go to Rai.

I rushed to the hospital and looked around. I felt relief when I saw Atobe there. "Atobe?"

He stood up. "He's still inside." He looked at the door. "It might be a while." He returned to his seat and sat down.

I sat down next to him. Unconsciously, I reached for his hand and held it. My baby was in there under a knife and I need assurance. He turned my hand and held it in his own instead. "He'll make it Fay, don't worry. Appendicectomy is an easy procedure. I'm just thankful I was able to bring him here in time."

I wasn't even listening to him, but I did hear my phone ring. I looked at the caller ID. "Fuji…"

"How are you?"

I hesitated, but told him that I was not in a good shape. He spoke to me for a while and hung up. I watched my surroundings and felt my heart ache. It's only been four days since Atobe had come to live with me, but why are so many things happening?

Does fate want us together as well?

Will I ever be able to forgive him for what he did?

Will my heart ever let him in?

I was pondering over these questions when he nudged me. I saw a doctor walk out and he immediately came over to us.

"He will be fine, but he'll need some time to recover from surgery." The doctor wrote something on his clip board. "I'd suggest that you two go home and rest. You can see him in a couple of hours."

I wanted to say no, but Atobe took my hand and pulled me up. "We'll do that," he said, pulling me towards the lobby after thanking the doctor. I stopped halfway.

"I want to stay."

"It won't do you any good."

I felt like being stubborn. "I want to stay," I repeated firmly. "I don't want to go home." If I went home then I would be forced to be there with you. I'll have to keep seeing you and what happened yesterday will keep coming back to me. I don't want to be alone with you.

 _Why are you still holding his hand?_

I stopped and my eyes went to the hand that I was clutching so tightly to. I immediately let go and looked away. Why are you doing this to me? Why are you torturing me like this? Why do you keep talking to me about Atobe?

 _I am more of your subconscious... Your inner self. You are confused. Even after you had that conversation with Niou, you are still confused and can't stop thinking of your ex-husband._

"Fay…" He reached for my hand, but I moved away.

"No," I said softly, holding my arm. "Please… Please just go." I looked away. "I just can't handle you at the moment."

He ignored my request and turned me around. The next minute, I felt being pulled into his arms. "Atobe?" I exclaimed, my voice muffled against his chest.

"Do you think that I was not terrified when I had to drive him to the hospital? All the pain he was in… But he still refused to cry because he said that it would make his mother sad." There was an edge in his voice. "Fay… I can't do it anymore. I can't raise him on my own. He needs his mother."

I wanted to say something, but he just let go of me and left.

 _What will you do now Mishima Fay?_

* * *

 _Later_

Oshitari Yuushi was looking over some documents alone at his apartment when he heard the furious banging of the door. Sai was staying at Kaede's and he was just enjoying some time on his own. He was startled at the sound and went to the door, opening it.

"Look at me…" Fay whispered, crying. "Look what you've done to me! I feel so pathetic." She fell on the floor. "I don't know what to do. I don't know what to do," she cried, covering her face. "I hate you, Yuushi. I hate you so much for putting me through this."

Oshitari calmly studied the situation and bent down. "Why do you keep doing this to yourself?" he asked, patting her head gently. "You still have three days to go and already you've caused so much drama."

He felt her seize his shirt and he thought she was going to slap him, but instead, she just fell forward and hugged him. "I'm such a mess… I'm such a mess… He told me things… He told me things that were so beautiful, but I can't believe him. No matter how sincere he sounds, I just can't believe him anymore." She moved her hand to his back and was clutching onto him so tightly that he knew he was getting a bruise there. "Yuushi, please stop this and tell him to leave. I can't take it anymore. I'm begging you. He is confusing me. One minute I hate him and then the next, I lo…" I stopped mid-sentence when I realized what I had just almost blurted out.

He gently took hold of her arm and moved it so she would not hold onto his back like that. "You need to calm down." He stood up, pulling her with him, but she was immovable. He ended up back on the floor. "Fay, this is for your own good. You just admitted that you loved him still."

And finally it came.

SLAP

Oshitari was actually stunned at that action, but he didn't show it on his face. He watched her rub her eyes and then surprised him by standing up and walked away without saying another word.

I didn't go back to my apartment. I roamed around the city for a couple of hours and then headed back to the hospital. I regretted slapping Yuushi, but I was so angry and upset that I didn't know what to do. How dare they plan this? Did they plan that I fall in love with him again? Nobody had the right to manipulate my life like this. I don't care if people told me that getting back together with Atobe was good for me. They had no right to say those things to me. They do not know what I had to go through. However… Sadly, it seemed to be working a bit.

When I walked into the hospital, I saw Fuji in the lobby. I didn't say anything but just hugged him tightly. I wanted to ask why he was here, but I could not find the words to speak. I was losing my sanity slowly and I felt like any little thing would trigger my tears so I remained silent. I had a feeling that Fuji knew it was something else and not Rai that had me in tears.

"Who caused these tears, Mishima?" I heard him ask. "Atobe or Niou?"

"I just want to see my baby," I said quietly as he held me. Fuji put his arm around me and walked me to Rai's room. He said he had already asked where he was staying.

We found Rai still asleep. There was a nurse next to him, but she left quietly once we were there. I sat next to him on the bed and held his hand.

"Fay, what's going on? You look like you are going to break down any minute."

I shook my head. "I just want my baby, Fuji, nothing else. I don't care about anyone else." I moved Rai's hair off his face and caressed his cheek. He chose that moment to wake up. "Ma… Mama…" he groggily whispered, blinking several times.

I leaned forward and peered into his face. "Hey sweetie," I whispered, rubbing my nose lightly with his. "Mummy's so proud of her little boy. You were very brave."

Rai tried to smile for me, but it was obvious that he was still under the influence of anesthetic. He held my hand and touched my hair with the other. "Daddy?" he asked curiously. I frowned because I didn't want to see Atobe, but I knew I couldn't deny a son of his father. I was going to make up an excuse, but…

"I'm here." He walked in, dressed in casual wear.

I didn't look at him, but I heard the light exchange between him and Fuji. The next thing I felt was that he was standing next to me. "How do you feel?" Atobe looked at Rai.

"I am hungry."

I chuckled, but then went serious. "You can't eat yet, sweetie."

Atobe ruffled his hair. "Your mother is right. If you eat now, you'll only throw it up."

He blinked, but nodded. "Can I go back to sleep then?" he asked, trying to move. He winced a little.

"And no moving either," I added. "Your stitches are still not healed."

Atobe looked at me, but I did not look back. I felt that gaze. I could feel it so bad. "Stay with him, Fay. I'm going to arrange to move him to our private hospital now. The rooms are more comfortable there."

I looked at him and when I did, I felt like it was wrong of me because my heart started beating faster. The way he was looking at me, did not help either. I instantly looked away. "I don't think it's a good idea to move him." I moved to stand up, but Rai held my hand and had that look in his eyes. It was then that I realized my baby was feeling very vulnerable. "It's alright," I said, poking his nose. "You're my brave little man. I will stay with you."

I stayed by his bed until he slept. Fuji stayed with me while Atobe left to make arrangements. Strangely, when I had disagreed with his earlier comment, he didn't say anything.

"Your ex-husband… He seems more tolerant these days."

I realized what Fuji meant by that. Normally Atobe would argue with me. He would be giving disapproving looks to my friend, but somehow today… I don't think he cared about anything. His focus seemed to be entirely on Rai. I felt tears in my eyes because my mind was starting to hassle me again. "Fuji," I whispered, covering my eyes.

He held me. "Tell me, Mishima," he urged. "I can help you."

I finally broke down. I told him everything. I told him about my divorce, I told him about how Rai was not with me, I told him everything.

Fuji moved his hand through my hair. I felt a tenderness that I never felt before. At the same time, it made me think of Niou. Although he came on too strongly at the beginning and he was always around, it made me sad to think of him. The thought of not seeing Niou for a while did that to me. My feelings were jumbled up, but I knew I would never go further with Niou as long as he has someone else on his mind. It made me wonder… When he tried to kiss me today - was he thinking of his deceased ex?

Fuji let go of me and my mind went to the dilemma that I was in at the moment. Even thought I was trying to ignore it, but I knew I had to seriously think of the situation I was in with Atobe.

"Maybe you should consider it," he suggested. "It might not be easy from the start, but it seems like it might help you both." He patted my head like a kid. The action made me frown. "He might've hurt you a lot, but I could tell for a fact that he places Rai over everything else."

Just then, Atobe walked in with a couple of nurses. They worked together to move Rai gently and then whisked him away. Atobe pulled out a card and handed it to me. "Go home and get some rest. You can come back and see Rai later. He will be at this address."

"I know where the place is," I muttered. I had given birth to Rai over there. He stopped when he heard my comment and turned to look at me. "Yes," he said, rubbing his jaw. "You gave birth to our baby there." He let out a sigh then and shook his head. "I'll see you later."

What… What just happened?

* * *

 _Another place, another mind…_

Niou stayed by the balcony. It seemed to be his favourite place these days. It was Aya's birthday and he was there with everyone else to celebrate it. However, he was not in the mood to celebrate. He spent a few hours with them as they danced, cut the cake, and shared the gifts. After that, he had quietly withdrawn to the balcony where he could be alone with his cigarette.

He knew he shouldn't have called her to ask her to help him with Aya's gift, but that was the first number he had dialed and however badly he wanted to admit that he was alright with letting her go, he was still not ready to do so.

He was deep in thought when he finally felt a hand on his arm. He turned to see Aya standing there with a pashmina around her shoulder. "You're not cold?" she asked him quietly, leaning on the balcony as well.

He turned and leaned his back against it. "I'm fine," he said, blowing smoke into the sky. "I'm fine."

She turned to him and raised her eyebrow. "It sounds more like you are trying to convince yourself that you are." She looked up at the sky as well. "I never realized you loved her so much, Masaharu."

"Che…" he muttered, sliding down and sitting on the floor. "I told myself I'd never like someone again." He looked down. "I almost did something stupid as well." He let out a sigh, recalling that he had almost kissed her unintentionally. "I need… I need to stop thinking about her." He rubbed his hand across his face and closed his eyes. He pulled out another cigarette, but Aya pulled it away from his mouth and sat down next to him. She placed her head on his shoulder. "You just have to be patient, little brother."

"I'm older than you," he mumbled, but he put his arm around her. "Is it wrong of me to wish they would never get together?"

Aya didn't say anything.

* * *

In the evening, I received a call from Kaede. She was asking about Rai and I told her that he was alright. I felt there was something else she wanted to say, but I didn't really give her the chance to say it. I was home packing an overnight because I was staying with Rai. Atobe had arranged to put him in a suite and told me to stay with him. It was not like I needed his consent on the matter… I had planned on staying anyway.

I picked up my overnight bag and walked to my door after switching the lights off. I went to the elevator when the doors opened and Yuushi walked out. I stopped and looked at him. He looked at me as well. However, I was too angry with him, so I simply sidestepped him and walked into the elevator. "I'll talk to you later," I said, pressing the ground floor button.

He placed his foot in just as the door closed. "Why do you and I always have issues by the elevator?" he demanded, walking back in. "You owe me an apology, damnit! That hurt!"

I stared at him and narrowed my eyes. "I am not apologizing to you. You deserved it." I crossed my arms.

We both glared at each other and then somehow as we descended, we calmed down. "Where are you going?" he finally asked, walking with me to the door.

I wanted to ignore him, but I realized that he wasn't really at fault and I was partially to blame for slapping him. "I'm going to spend the night with Rai. Atobe's arranged it and I don't want to leave my baby alone."

"Fay?"

"Don't you dare say anything with Atobe's name in it or I will slap you again," I threatened. "I just can't tolerate this kind of talk at the moment. My only concern now is my baby boy." I walked out. "Now, do you want to come with me or not?" As I said that, my stomach let out a rather annoying growl. I immediately hugged myself, embarrassed.

Yuushi smirked. "How about I feed you first and then we go see Rai?" he suggested casually. "Also, Atobe is joining us. I was actually supposed to meet him for dinner."

I don't know why, but I felt like I was set up. I was too angry to even argue with him.

Surprisingly, dinner was going rather well. Although I didn't say much, but Atobe and Yuushi had been conversing non-stop for hours. Even though it was all business, I was just thankful that it was not a noiseless dinner.

"So Yuushi, when are you going to introduce me to her?"

The question made me stop. Actually I almost dropped my sushi. Somehow, it seemed rather a weird question. I stopped picking up my sushi and eyed Yuushi who was just looking calmly at Atobe. I waited and waited for him to answer, but he didn't. "Who?" I finally asked out of curiosity.

"Since you're so busy causing drama in your life, you wouldn't know that Yuushi's been seeing someone lately." Atobe eyed me dangerously.

His comment was just asking me to blind him with my chopstick, but I ignored him and looked at Yuushi. "Yuushi, since you're butting into my life so much, I think I have every right to know," I declared, pointing my chopsticks at him.

Atobe rubbed his jaw. "Actually it was stupid of me to mention it. It's better that you don't get involved in this, or we might have another Yui incident"."

That made me stop.

That made Yuushi stop.

I realized that even Atobe somehow realized that he had done something wrong.

I eyed the both of them. "Explain your sentence, please…"

They were both silent. I felt like I had intruded big time into a very private secret. "Atobe…"

He stood up. "I'm sorry, Fay. This is one time which I'm going to say it's none of my business. I'll leave it up to Yuushi if he wants you to know or not," he said seriously. "I'll excuse myself for a minute. I need to wash my hands." He walked away to the restroom, leaving me alone with Yuushi.

I felt edgy. Something just didn't seem right. I waited for him to say something, buy he didn't say anything. I watched him as he picked up his wine glass and drank it in one gulp. That made me realize how stressed out he was. "Yuushi?"

"The night Yui drove out of the house was because we were arguing, Fay. Somehow Yui had a mental image that I was having an affair with someone…"

My eyes widened. Was that woman crazy? I shook my head suddenly, remembering that it was not good to speak ill of the dead. I waited for him to continue. However, my mind still went to what he said. How could Yui have thought that? Yuushi adored her…

"She thought it was you, Fay."

I didn't say anything. I just stared dumbfounded at him, but I wisely chose to stay quiet. Fortunately for me, Atobe had decided to join us at that moment. I finally spoke. "Is that why your so persistent, Yuushi? Are you feeling guilty?"

He looked up. "Persistent?"

I didn't answer his confused look. I placed my napkin down and stood up. "Atobe, I'd like to leave please," I said, not looking at him. "Can we go to Rai?"

He looked at Yuushi then back at me. He finally nodded and stood up. The waiter brought our coats and I thanked Yuushi quietly and walked out. We both stood still and looked around. "I'll get us a cab, since my car is not here and driver had to leave earlier."

I stopped him. "Can we walk? It's not very far."

He thought about it and finally nodded. He reached out and took my hand. I stopped and looked at him. He stopped as well and the look on his face made me realize that he had done it unconsciously. I felt my heart pounding.

"It's ok," I finally said. "I'm cold."

We walked in silence when he finally broke it. "Were you ever serious about anyone?"

I looked at him, trying to think of his question.

"Serious?"

He shrugged. "Physically."

I stopped walking as he walked ahead, but stopped and turned around to face me. "What are you asking me, Atobe? Are you asking me if I've slept with someone? Or are you asking me if I've been close to someone?"

"I'm asking if my ex-wife had someone she was serious about since our divorce. I keep feeling that you're comparing me to someone else."

I looked at him and realized that for the first time in my life I am watching Atobe Keigo vulnerable. Am I comparing him to someone else? Am I comparing him to Niou? Uh-oh… I looked away. "I'm not comparing you, Atobe. I don't have anyone to compare you to."

"Fay…" he reached for my shoulder, but I moved away.

"But I know you do, Atobe. I know how many women you've been with during the last two years."

He grabbed my upper arm and lifted my chin. "Do you really think I was serious about them?"

"But that doesn't hide the fact that you have been with others, Keigo!" I said, using his first name. "Damn you." I cried, rubbing my eyes. "You took everything from me, Keigo. I was happy. You took my boy. You took my friends. You took _everything_ and then you shared them with others. And I don't know why after all this and after all the horrible things you've done to me, I still can't despise you properly. I try, but I can't! Every time you do something horrible, you end up doing something nice ten times better! Do you _seriously_ plan this?"

Atobe looked at me and he pulled me gently into his arms. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry," he kept repeating. "But you owe me as much, damnit! You asked me for a divorce! How do you think I felt when I saw the papers?"

"I lost my baby! I lost my baby! I wanted it so much, but I lost it." I cried softly. "It hurt too much and I kept remembering it in my dreams. You weren't there. Nobody was there for me. Yuushi only found out by accident. If my own husband wasn't there for me then who would be?"

He let out a sigh. "I was a bad husband, wasn't I?"

I looked up at him. "Yes, you were the worst kind." I moved his hair off his eyes as he rubbed my tears. "You'd probably win a crown for it."

He moved his thumb gently across my lower lip and kissed my forehead. It was tender, not forced. It felt real and I actually felt loved. He took my hand again. "Let's go to our son, Mishima."

Back at the hospital I watched as Rai slept soundly. I had read something to him before he went to sleep. My mind went to the conversation I had with Yuushi when he dropped me here.

 _Now I understood a bit more why he was doing all this. I think he was trying to feel less guilty about Yui's death and he wanted to prove that there was nothing going on between us. What better way to do it than get me back together with my ex-husband?_

I still didn't know why Yui thought he was having an affair with me. Is it because he spent a lot of time with me? She should've known me better than this. I would never do anything like that.

I let out a sigh.

I had three more days with Atobe. The walk here had opened a whole new set of emotions for me. I saw my ex-husband's vulnerable side. A side he had always kept hidden. A side he had never exposed to anyone, not even to me.

Was I ready? Did I want the days to end? Did I want to continue this? I stood up and kissed Rai's forehead. He murmured something, but then smiled and relaxed. I walked to the other bedroom and found Atobe sound asleep. I was thankful that he was fully dressed. It made me wonder though. He always made sure he changed clothes before going to bed. Why he is fully clothed? Is he _that_ tired from the walk? I walked up to him and hesitated, but I placed my hand on his forehead. I thought he was sick, but no fever. As I withdrew my hand, he grabbed it instantly, almost making me scream.

He blinked dazed, but let go of my hand and sat up. He rubbed his face and let out a sigh. "I didn't mean to fall asleep." He stood up, but he almost lost his footing and I grasped his upper arm.

I rolled my eyes and pushed him back on the bed. "Go to sleep," I ordered, pulling the blanket and covering him with it. "Why do you men always have to act macho? It's obvious that you're exhausted."

"Shut up," he muttered, rolling to his side and closing his eyes. "Just let me sleep," he said, contradicting himself.

I picked up the pillow next to him and walked out of the room. This is a suite, but where the hell am I supposed to sleep? I thought, looking around the lavish living room. It only had one guest room and the other room was occupied by Rai. I didn't want to disturb my son. I looked at the couch, but it really looked uncomfortable. I let out a sigh and decided to sleep on the floor, but the minute I did that, I saw Atobe walk out. "Go back to the room," he ordered, rubbing his now bare chest.

As usual, my stubbornness came out. "I'm fine," I muttered, lying on the floor, but cursed inwardly when I felt the hard and cold floor. I just gritted my teeth and closed my eyes.

I heard him mumbled something and then I heard another sound, which I assumed was him dialing a number. "Housekeeping, could you please send us an extra bed?"

I groaned inwardly and thought what an idiot I was. I forget we were in a luxurious place. However, I wasn't prepared when I felt myself being lifted up. I stayed stiff and refused to say anything. He walked back to the room and I thought I was going to be placed gently on the bed, but found myself dropped like a sack of potatoes onto it.

"You…" I glared, but winced as I felt a slight pain at my back.

He smirked. "Why do you insist on being stubborn, Mishima? Didn't the walk back here clear your mind?" he asked, hands on his hips. "I thought you said you'll try to stop hating me."

"I don't need to try."

He raised an eyebrow and walked towards me. "You've got serious issues. One minute you fight me, and then the next minute I find this longing look in your eyes… It's like you're dying to be kissed."

I stared at him dumbfounded. "Are you drunk?" I demanded, remembering that he had drank a bit when we were sitting with Rai earlier. He was on the bed now and was crawling towards me. The closer he got, the more I backed away.

When he was finally in front of me and I had nowhere else to go, he just stared at me.

"You know… I think I am," he admitted, scratching his head. He shook his head and to my surprise, he placed his head on my lap and closed his eyes. I looked down and realized that he had passed out. What the hell…

I moved his hair off his eyes and it hit me that he wasn't even faking it. I frowned. As I watched him, I started to feel weak. It looked so real and it looked so beautiful. It was beautiful when we first got married. Could it be beautiful again?

 _You need to decide…_

I let out a sigh as my mind talked to me again. It was starting to really bother me these days.

 _This is my final confrontation with you, Mishima Fay._

 _Your ex-husband wants you._

 _Are you willing to accept him?_

It was finally…

* * *

 _ **~*~*~Day Seven~*~*~**_

I don't know what I had hoped to gain from the seven days that Atobe stayed with me. I'll admit that we went through a lot of things and my heart had opened up a bit towards him again.

Rai was recovering nicely and he could walk around a bit already.

I was sitting in front of my mirror, staring at my own reflection. In front of me I saw another me, all dressed up. My hair had been blow-dried and I had put on a pair of earrings. I'm not really into accessories, but I was told to dress up and go out with Atobe for a last dinner.

I was in such a 'blah' mood that I didn't really argue. It really was weird for me… We had our fights and once we had our heated moment as well. I just didn't get it. Why was I confused like this?

I was confused…

I was confused even now as I sat in front of him.

I was also annoyed because we were at _that_ restaurant. My last memory of it had been disastrous and I hated him for bringing me here again. I looked up at him and felt that something was off. He looked preoccupied, like he had something on his mind. It had been seven days, but even I had to admit that something had changed.

I wasn't sure what it was, though.

I ate in silence.

He ate in silence.

He finally tried conversing a bit. Our conversation was pure crap, but we were trying to at least look normal in this place. He looked up from his plate and picked a strand of my hair. "You look beautiful tonight."

I raised an eyebrow, pushing his hand away and picking up my wine glass. "I am always beautiful."

He chuckled. "And you call me vain?"

"I have the right to say I'm beautiful," I said gracefully, moving my hand through my hair. I knew I had drunk more than one glass and it was getting to me. "Your personality sucks, so you have no right to say you're beautiful."

"Not beautiful. I would say I'm more handsome."

"No," I disagreed. "You are attractive, that even I admit, Atobe Keigo." I watched him. I didn't want to admit it, but I would have to be blind to say he wasn't a good-looking man. The fact that he made a lot of women stop and stare at him when he walked in to a place proved it. However, the question that my mind was asking me was: Why the hell are you giving his ego more boosts at the moment? I was probably more drunk than I thought.

"It's the same as handsome."

"No."

"Fay?" he said stopping me. "We don't have to do this."

I was going to answer, but the waiter chose that moment to clear our table. When our plates were taken away, he finally looked at me. "How do you feel, Fay?" He looked at me and ignored our previous conversation.

I picked up my glass again and sipped the wine. "Feel about what?"

"Us."

Us. One word. I thought about it and I didn't know what to think. I wasn't sure what to think. Should I listen to my instincts and go for the happy family and concentrate on my son? Or should I abandon my ex-husband and just stick with my little boy when he was free?

He stood up. He looked around and I realized that there was no one around on the terrace where we were. "Fay… I thought of this seriously…" he said, standing next to me. "I thought of doing this before that stupid blackmail that ended up with me staying with you." He knelt down.

My eyes widened in shock when I realized what he was about to do. "Atobe, don't…"

Pulling out a box from his pocket, "Mishima Fay, will you marry me again?" He held the box open in front of me, revealing a beautiful diamond ring.

* * *

 **[Author's Note: Hello everyone... The next two chapters will be the different endings. One where Fay says yes, while the other when she declines his proposal. I hope that you will enjoy them]**


	11. Ending 1

My heart ached for what I was about to do. I clasped his hands and closed the box that he held in his hand. "I'm sorry," I whispered helping him stand up. "Atobe, my heart…my heart will never allow you back in," I said quietly. "This past week has been wonderful and I've learned so much about Rai, but I can't love you anymore. You've hurt me too much."

He looked stunned.

The truth was my heart was not alright with it. As much as I tried to make it work, I was afraid of letting him back in again because of what I might go through. I was a coward. That I admit.

The months that Rai was not with me and knowing that I was officially divorced, hurt me so much. I wanted to die. I actually contemplated killing myself. I knew now that Rai was old enough to acknowledge me and stay with me on weekends.

"Fay…"

"I'm sorry," I said walking away fro him. The situation wound me too much. I walked away from him, forever.

I let out a sigh and went back home.

I buried myself in my work the following weeks. I ignored Atobe. He didn't come near me and I didn't go near him. Rai was officially mine three times during the week and I was working part-time so I could be with him when he was staying with me.

One night I was at the supermarket shopping when I bumped into Aya. I looked at her and smiled, "Hey," I greeted. "It's been a while."

Aya smiled. "Yes, I haven't seen you around for ages."

I nodded. We chatted for a bit and she suggested having dinner since we were both free. I agreed walking with her to a restaurant after leaving our purchases in a car. "How have you been?" Aya asked sipping her fresh juice.

"Alright, I guess," I answered. "I've been busy with work and taking care of my son."

"Isn't that a hubby's job?"

I laughed sarcastically. "Yeah, right…" I muttered. "Not really. I get Rai three times a week."

Aya blinked. In fact she looked surprised. "I thought you got back with your ex-husband," she remarked. "I'm sorry I don't mean to be nosey."

I let out a sigh. "No, you're not being nosey," I admitted. "He wanted to, but…I said no. My heart was just not into him anymore. It never was…"

Aya remained silent. We ate quietly when she finally spoke. "Have…Have you seen Masaharu?"

I shook my head sadly. "I haven't seen Niou since I went to give him my condolences for his friend dying. It's so sad for him to lose someone he loves," I admitted pushing a strand of my hair behind my ear.

"Fay…"

I looked up at Aya and noticed that there was something serious about the way she was looking at me.

"Masaharu made all that up."

I blinked. "He…made all that up?"

Aya nodded and spoke to me quietly. I was stunned hearing what she was telling me. Niou…Niou wanted me? Although it does fit in why he suddenly backed off, but…damnit! It was my decision to make, not his! However, I could not find my voice to say anything.

"Does this change anything for you?" Aya asked interrupting my thoughts continuing to sip her juice.

"I…I don't know," I admitted looking down playing with my glass. "I wasn't expecting this."

We finished eating when Aya finally asked the question I didn't want to hear. "What are you going to do?" she asked as we both left the restaurant. We walked to her car and I was still silent. "Fay…"

"I don't know…" I whispered shaking my head. "I really don't know," I said. "I'm sorry, but I need to go. Thank you for dinner, Aya." I bowed. "And thank you for telling me."

She nodded and told me to take care of myself. I left her and walked to my car. The realization just hit me. I was angry as well because I really felt bad for him when he told me, but all this time he had been lying? And his friends helped him? I gritted my teeth and drove straight to his apartment. I wanted to confront my anger.

I slammed my car door shut when I arrived and stomped to his floor. I knew where he lived and I didn't care what time it was. Although it was late by the time Aya and I had dinner, I really didn't care.

I knocked and knocked till he finally opened the door. My eyes narrowed at him and I did not care that he was only clad in a towel and his hair was wet. "You lied to me," I accused crossing my arms because I knew if they were not doing anything then they would be hitting him.

It was his turn to narrow his eyes. "Who told you?"

"It doesn't matter who told me!" I said angrily. "Why did you do that? It was my decision to make. I had no plans on returning to…hmph…"

"I missed these lips…" he murmured against my lips while holding me. My anger lessened in seconds and I put my arms around his neck. "I hate you," I whispered kissing him back. He kept kissing me and lifted me as I held on tighter. The idiot knew he had a physical affect on me as we kissed. I didn't care what this brought and I didn't care what would happen even after he took me to his bedroom.

* * *

I stirred in the bed that was not mine and moved my hand to only find that the space next to me was cold and it was obvious that the person who had occupied the bed with me had been gone for a long time. I sat up slightly and looked around Niou's bedroom trying to adjust my eyes to the darkness. Normally if it were my own apartment, I'd say that he had left but I was at his place so the question in mind is where was he? I moved to the foot of the bed and placed my feet on the cold floor. I looked down to see if there was anything I could put on, but didn't find any so I just dragged the bed sheets around me and stood up. I walked through his apartment trying to find any source of life or light, but it was so dark that I almost stumbled. Finally after searching for some time, I found a light from a distance room and walked towards it. When I walked in I realized that this room was apparently a study, for it was equipped with a library, computer screens, and it wielded me to see a lot of gadgets on the floor.

"Snooping?"

His voice startled me. I looked around till I found him by the large window sitting on a chair. He was only in boxers and as usual one of his hands occupied a cigarette and he had a drink settled on his desk. That didn't surprise me, but what did was the fact that he was in front of a laptop typing. I hesitated, "What are you doing?" I asked as I walked towards him carefully so I wouldn't step on anything that was on the floor. He placed the cigarette in his mouth as he typed, "one minute."

I finally reached him and being this close to him engulfed my sense of smell. He had apparently showered again and he smelled so good. It was then that I noticed that his hair was wet as well. As I leaned by his shoulder to take a look, but he turned in his chair startling me. "Nosey."

I coughed at the smoke of his cigarette and waved my hand in front of my face. "I'm not nosey, just curious," I muttered. "Didn't you quit smoking?" I coughed again.

He crossed his arms and watched me, "That looks good on you." he remarked referring to the bed sheets. He took my hand and pulled me closer nestling me on his lap and turned the chair so we were facing his laptop. "I told you I was a freelancer." He explained as he continued typing. "One of the things I do is write software's."

That didn't surprise me, but shocked me. Here I thought that he was a total bum, but writing software's? "That is new to me..." I admitted softly leaning back. "If I have time to chase after you during the day that doesn't mean I don't work at night." He mumbled with a cigarette still in his mouth as he typed. I put my head on his chest and closed my eyes. I realized I missed this. I missed his warmth. I missed his feelings. I missed his craziness. "You're so warm…" I murmured nuzzling against his neck.

My statement stopped him from typing. "Eh?"

I didn't look at him, but played with some strands of his hair. He hadn't tied it and just kept it loose "You're warm." I repeated moving my fingers through a strand of his silver locks.

He took the cigarette out of his mouth and threw it in his glass. I felt his arms come around me while I still lay like that. He lifted my chin and gave me a gentle kiss. I cupped the side of his face and looked at him. "What does this change?" I asked quietly searching his face.

He took my hand that was cupping his face and kissed my fingers. "Nothing, except that you are mine," he answered as a matter of fact trailing his lips from my fingers to my arms.

I shuddered slightly at the Goosebumps that were rising, "Niou…" I said moving my arm away. "I have a son."

"I am Niou Masaharu, Mishima," he stated bluntly. "I will worship anything that belongs to you." he kissed my neck. "Even though it horrifies me to know that he's half of that arrogant ass, but we can make our own complete little Mishima and Niou, no?"

That made me stop when I realized what he was saying, "you want kids?"

"No," he answered standing up and lifting me in the process. I put my arms around his neck. "Anyone wants kids. I want kids with you," he said loudly and clearly walking back to the bedroom.

* * *

 _Epilogue_

Today, I am happy that I bumped into Aya that evening or I would've never known of Niou's feelings for me. And somehow that evening I realized I had feelings for him too when I found out.

I had moved to a bigger apartment. No, we both had moved to a bigger apartment. That is when we got married. After that night, Masaharu proposed to me after a year. It did take a while, but we were both comfortable. During my wedding, I had asked for a small and simple one. I did not want to go through the Atobe Gala again.

I think the fact that he was married shocked a lot of his friends, but he loved surprising them all the time. I also liked the fact that Rai liked his new step dad, they seem to have bonded immediately and even Aya started liking him. I did laugh the first time Rai met Masaharu, he went all defensive, Atobe style.

However, Rai was overprotective of me, but not as much as he was over his little sister. I watched as Rai held her little hand while she was taking her first baby steps. My little girl was growing up beautifully and unfortunately she already had all of her father's mischievous personality in her.

Masaharu had really surprised me when she was born. He would wake up at nights with me when she needed attention. He'd take care of her when I needed him to and he was always there for the both of us.

I watched him as he picked her up from Rai and held her. She squealed in delight at her father and patted his cheeks. At the same time I saw her godfather walk in as well. I waved at Fuji as he walked in and gave him a smile. Fuji had been nothing, but supportive of me since the beginning. I will always love him, for he was like a brother to me.

I looked at my small family and smiled. I did go through a lot of hardship and emotional turmoil in my life, but the end result was beautiful. I will never regret what I have now.


	12. Ending 2

I clasped the box that he held in his hand and gave him a tiny smile. "I don't need a ring to marry you again, Atobe," I said quietly. However, he ignored what I said and opened it again. He took it out of the box and gently took my finger and slipped it through. He brought me close and held me gently, "This time I'll make sure you don't slip out of my life like the last ring," he whispered into my ears.

I looked up at him. Somehow I felt my heart thumping, "are you comparing me to a ring, Atobe?" I demanded looking up at him.

He let out a sigh. "You seriously have a bad habit of killing someone's mood," he muttered pulling me even closer and kissing my lips lightly. He grabbed my hand and led me out, "Move…" he ordered pulling me with him. "We're going to pick up Rai and do this properly."

I never thought Keigo would propose to me that night or let alone me say yes to his proposal. When we picked up Rai and his father told him of the news, he let out a shout of happiness and hugged me tightly.

His mother had been left speechless when she heard of the news, but I could've sworn I heard congratulation somewhere in her mumbling statement. She didn't look too happy, but I was glad that she didn't look angry either. Once the shock of the news was forgotten, she had immediately started planning for a grand wedding, and before I could intervene Keigo stopped her and said it will be a small wedding because he wanted to marry me the next day.

That was the number one shock for me and his mother. The second one had been when he announced that he was going to live in my apartment for a while and then we'll move into the mansion because he still wanted to spend some quality time with Rai and myself.

I was in my apartment now chopping vegetables for dinner when I felt a familiar pair of arms around me and a rather impatient lip on my neck. I moved my head away. "Keigo," I said annoyed trying to finish chopping. "I told you a thousand times don't do that when I'm holding a knife."

As usual, being the Keigo he is, he ignored my scolding and hugged me even tighter. His hands moved to my tummy and placed his hands on it gently. "When are we going to tell Rai?"

I bit my lips and actually blushed. Yes, it is true that I am pregnant now. This time he wanted it, but I didn't because I was new to this environment. I still had my doubts sometimes and I was afraid. I was afraid to love and be let go again. "Not yet, Keigo," I said quietly putting my hand on his. "I still have to come to terms with this myself."

"You agreed to marry me, but you're still having problems trusting me. We've been married for seven months now."

I leaned back, "I'm sorry. I'm really sorry." The truth was that I hadn't been ready to tell him either, but my morning sickness and mood swings immediately made him guess that I was indeed with a child. It irritated me when he was always alert about his surroundings.

He didn't say anything, but continued holding me. I finally moved away a bit and resumed chopping. It was a daily chore for me, to make dinner. I had two healthy boys to feed and sometimes three if I included Yuushi.

He didn't leave me, but leaned on the counter and watched me. "When are you ready to move back to the mansion?"

I stopped chopping and rinsed my hand. "Do we have to?" I asked honestly. "Aren't you comfortable here?" picking up a towel and wiping my hands dry with it.

"It's not that," he started. I had the feeling he was trying to choose his words carefully. "Once the baby comes, it will be easier for you back at home."

I walked up to him and clutched his shirt lightly. "You're using the baby as an excuse again," I whispered in his ears. "You promised that you wouldn't. You just want to go home because you're bored here."

"Don't put words in my mouth, Fay." He took my hand and led me to the bedroom. "I just want you to be comfortable and there are help there that can assure that."

I found myself on the bed with him. For the past days, I did notice that he was tired. However, what surprised me was that he just liked to lie on the bed and hold me. I was wondering if I was a stuffed teddy bear for him that he missed at home. I didn't move away though. I laid my head under his jaw and played with the buttons of his shirt. "We can move, but…not yet," I admitted. "I just want this a bit longer."

I was afraid. I was afraid once we move into the mansion, everything would change again. His controlling mother, the overwhelming help, and his disappearance would initiate again.

I stayed like that for a bit when I finally felt him relax, which indicated to me that he was asleep. The arms that were around me softened their hold and I moved slowly. He was asleep with light strands of his hair on his eyes. I brushed them away and moved him gently to his side and lay him fully on the bed.

I walked out and went to continue preparing dinner. I had a feast in mind tonight, for it was Aya's birthday. I had also ordered a cake for her and asked Yuushi to pick it up. He argued with me about that, but I told him there would be no objections.

* * *

 _Later_

"Make a wish, sweetie," I told Aya gently as she looked at the huge cake in front of her. It was a small gathering, but filled with her loved ones. Her father, Rai, Keigo, and Fuji were there. I knew my husband was not fond of my best friend, but I admired him for not saying it out loud. I was disappointed that Kaede and Jirou couldn't make it, but they sent their love and they sent it wrapped in three huge boxes for her.

Keigo surprised me as well, he had bought her clothes and lots of designer ones. Full outfits with shoes, accessories, and whatever she could want. In addition to that, he got her dolls as well.

Yuushi had gotten her ears pierced as a promise and she was gleaming with her new sets of earrings. I was also surprised to see Fuji handing her one of those new consoles a gift, but he didn't get her one only, but got Rai as well. "A DS LITE?" Rai exclaimed, "For me too?"

"Why is Rai-kun's blue and mine's pink?" Aya asked.

Her statement made us laugh. While everyone had some cake, Keigo offered a piece to me, but I suddenly got hit by an attack of nausea. I immediately withdrew and went to the bathroom. This time it kept coming and coming until I almost collapsed on the bathroom floor. I finally steadied my breathing, washed my face, brushed my teeth and walked out dazed.

That was really a hard one, I still felt woozy. I almost lost my balance if Yuushi didn't hold my waist. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine," I answered holding his upper arm. I still felt shaken.

"You were throwing up for a long time," he added. "Are you pregnant?" he speculated rubbing his jaw.

I looked at him wryly. "I'm fine," I said quietly walking away from him. "The cake smelled too sweet for me, that's all," I confirmed going back to the living room.

Fuji walked in and looked at Oshitari, "She's pregnant."

Oshitari nodded. "That she is," he answered as a matter of fact.

* * *

 _Epilogue_

When I was seven months pregnant and showing, Keigo finally persuaded me to move back to the mansion. I wasn't in the mood to object or argue because I had been too tired from my pregnancy.

It felt weird though when I was back there. I was so used to getting my own things done that it annoyed me to have someone at my beck and call. I wasn't complaining, but it just annoyed me. I was also feeling like I was being watched all the time. I wasn't free to move around like I wanted to or go out without getting the third degree from his mother, but I ignored all those.

However, it was still alright because he had managed to be at home a lot. Come to think of it, I don't think I ever really spent this much time with him at home before.

I was now in the reading area of my wing nestled on a couch with a book on my lap. I decided to do some reading as I had nothing much to do with me being in this condition. The one thing I realized as I read was that I really missed Yuushi and Aya. Aya had cried so much when we moved and I actually scolded Keigo, but I knew he was only thinking what was best for the family.

Rai spent a lot of time and asked a lot of questions about his sibling. I was patient with him, for I knew what a curious boy he was. He was back to nursery now and will start school next year.

I spent a lot of time with Fuji and I finally met his boyfriend. It wasn't what I expected. Unlike Fuji who was so carefree and smiling all the time, Tezuka was serious and you could rarely know what he was thinking of. It didn't matter. I knew he made Fuji happy and that's what matters.

Nioh called from time to time and I met him a few times. It was a refreshing change for me and I liked his company. That one time that we almost had something going might've changed my life, but it didn't. He respected me and so did I.

I thought back to all the things I had to go through in my life.

My divorce.

My fights.

My friends.

My son.

I will admit that to this day I was still having problems letting Keigo fully into my heart. It's true that we were married and acted like a couple in all aspect, but I was still hesitant. I was even more terrified being pregnant. The closer that I was nearing to my due date, the more worried I was getting. I'm sure that he had sensed my uneasiness and withdrawal, but he was trying. I knew he was trying. Maybe this was the hardest thing he had to ever try in his life.

Standing up, I walked to the balcony but didn't go outside. I looked down at our garden and saw it busy as usual. People were maintaining, gardener was tending to the flowers; and my mother in law was having her daily tea with some guests.

I felt it again. His arms around me. He joked several times that even with me being this pregnant, he can still put his full arms around me. "You're early," I said quietly placing a hand on his upper arm.

"Yes," he remarked. "How are my girls?"

"What makes you think it's a girl?"

"It is a girl because Ore-sama says so."

I rolled my eyes. "I was wondering when I was going to hear that title of yours again." I moved away from him and turned around. "Well if you must know, I didn't ask for the sex of the baby and I'm not going to."

He hugged me. "I want a girl, Mishima," he whispered in my ears. "But I will still love it equally even if it was a boy. A girl I can spoil more though."

"Like Aya?" I asked wryly thinking how much Keigo has spent on her already.

"Exactly."

I moved in closer to him. "Keigo, I'm terrified," I admitted placing my head on his shoulders. I put my arms around him. "I don't want to go through what happened with Rai not being with me. I don't think I'll be able to live through that again." I looked up and searched his eyes for any acknowledgement. I searched it frantically for comfort and reassurance. "Keigo?"

"We'll work this out, Mishima I promise you that."

And after that, surprisingly we did and what Keigo didn't know was that I…

I was pregnant with twin girls.


End file.
